Dapling
Duke Fishron
How about rather than inflicting confusion on taking a hit, it pulls from a random pool of debuffs and inflicts it on enemies around you? This wouldn't be great, but imagine if it pulled something like betsy's curse? Obviously it couldn't do anything like Darkness or Slowed, but it would still at least have a chance to be useful and still would work thematically. (Because confusion in games generally refers to something random happening.)
Another idea (thanks @ShadeDB) is to be granted a random buff on every hit. This could either be extremely helpful (well fed) or useless (gills) but it would allow for interesting strategies such as taking a bunch of hits in a row from a weak enemy in order to find a floating island.
A third option is taking both and giving a 50% chance for each. It would be at least a fun item, if not a very practical one.
Another idea (thanks @ShadeDB) is to be granted a random buff on every hit. This could either be extremely helpful (well fed) or useless (gills) but it would allow for interesting strategies such as taking a bunch of hits in a row from a weak enemy in order to find a floating island.
A third option is taking both and giving a 50% chance for each. It would be at least a fun item, if not a very practical one.
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