Humorous Cheese sticks conspiracy theories

Are my conspiracy theories

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  • Meh

  • Bad

  • Terrible

  • Funny

  • Funny and amazing

  • It's shouldn't for me to vote (don't vote for this)


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Today's theory:
Dinosaurs are not real:
Dinosaurs are not real. How do I know this because they are so big and apparently birds are their relatives but how did something so big become so small dinosaurs were used to cover up ALIENS. The aliens planted bones so people focus on that instead of trying to find them. So dinosaurs are not real.
 
My theory:
The Clothier was trained by goblin sorcerers since he uses shadowflame powers to defend himself which are a goblin-exclusive art.
So he was either trained by rogue goblins who tried to help humanity or he was part of a goblin cult/clan and then thrown back into human society.
OR..... he is actually a goblin disguised as a normal human (doesn't mean I forgive him for what he did to my mechanic though)
 
Today's theory:
we are aliens:
We are aliens. We live on a planted and can travel through space after about a year of preparation. If aliens saw us we would be aliens technically making us aliens and that leads to my next theory aliens are real:
Why do you think stars flash it is the aliens sending us signals and shooting starts are alien space ships. How else would something move that fast without crashing into earth because of gravity. Which leads back to the flat earth theory meaning gravity wouldn't exist without flat earth or else it would fall down and that is why aliens send signals because they study our odly shaped planet to one day invade or even destroy. Meaning people want to wipe out the human civilization at first they tried FAKING DINOSAUR EXISTENCE like in my other theory to scare us off so now they are observing us waiting to strike or even BLOW UP EARTH USING THE SUN WIPING OUT THE SOLAR SYSTEM how I know this the sun has gas that can explode and it has been proven the sun will eventually explode killing us all.
 
Today's theory:
Life is an apple pie:
Life is an apple pie. You eat it and it's great but then U eat to much and start projectile vomiting everywhere and it's not so great which pretty much describes life. (Short Theory prob will do another one later)
 
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