Destory Lord English [...minus lord english]

to do list: pill reforging, gloriously bland wall of sanity, weapons and stuff, bird, space-ships, aliens, out-dated jokes, pimping, flabs, dabs, fabs, jabs, undead cats

Red Legendary Moldy Cheese Wedge:
[+15% dmg, +10% spd, +5% crit chance, +10% size, +15% knockback] [Non-Euclidean]
15% increased base dmg, plus another 60.5% because of maths (calculations are crazy) and science (unless I was wrong about that. once again, I'm not sober). ignores up to 10% dodge. nat 20 = crit. knockback is a thing. causes insanity on crits.

Gunpowder's for chumps: 3 Psi points. attack an enemy
Solace: 3 psi points. can be used with any attack. attack ignores dodge.
Mind Palace: 7 psi points. 50% dodge for the round.
Mind Crush: 5 psi points. causes random negative mental effect (insanity, blindness, depression, blind rage, ect)
Null Lance: 10 psi points. ignores any damage reduction or chances to miss. cannot be blocked. penetrates through entities body-guarding target.
Shatter: 11 psi points. AoE attack that also Mind Crushes all targets. (targets are chosen randomly)
Fuse: 15-30 points, depending. use any of targets abilities. increase cost of psi points based on ability strength.
Mind Meld: Target must be willing. target is Mind Crushed. TOG II regains psi points.

Denito Surrexit, the Colors of the Universe, Cairo Overcoat, piece of Leather (to be used at a later date (secret plan)), Skeleton Brush/Flail! , Admiral's Cap, tons(-1) of candy corn (in the CO), local Big Bad Guy Corpse, Enny's liver in a bag of holding.

+2 ACk

(18 +1} 19/?? maybe like a big 'splosion or somethin

(4 } 4/?? Attack of the Radioactive Hamsters From a Planet Near Mars

(4 } 4/?? cooling off with some Airconditiong


[5 } 5\[10] Blue Skadoo, we can too!

[5 } 5\[10] Return of the revenge of the RED BARON!

Blue!TOG II (psi-abilities in notes):
GCeer:
LORD FRENCH:
TOG II: you died, right?






this is getting continued later, I guess
 
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LAWSUIT 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO 85/120
Grand necromancy 53/150
I've got a jar of dirt 31/57
1/10 transcendent eye


+2 doofman

bank account: 7 Edgelord points.
WARLOCK: 6

i walk over to the cooperhammer and exclaim, you are mine now. i then run up to food and plague and say, this is mine now. too bad so sad.

i attack great healthbar
 
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to do list: pill reforging, gloriously bland wall of sanity, weapons and stuff, bird, space-ships, aliens, out-dated jokes, pimping, flabs, dabs, fabs, jabs, undead cats

Red Legendary Moldy Cheese Wedge:
[+15% dmg, +10% spd, +5% crit chance, +10% size, +15% knockback] [Non-Euclidean]
15% increased base dmg, plus another 60.5% because of maths (calculations are crazy) and science (unless I was wrong about that. once again, I'm not sober). ignores up to 10% dodge. nat 20 = crit. knockback is a thing. causes insanity on crits.

Gunpowder's for chumps: 3 Psi points. attack an enemy
Solace: 3 psi points. can be used with any attack. attack ignores dodge.
Mind Palace: 7 psi points. 50% dodge for the round.
Mind Crush: 5 psi points. causes random negative mental effect (insanity, blindness, depression, blind rage, ect)
Null Lance: 10 psi points. ignores any damage reduction or chances to miss. cannot be blocked. penetrates through entities body-guarding target.
Shatter: 11 psi points. AoE attack that also Mind Crushes all targets. (targets are chosen randomly)
Fuse: 15-30 points, depending. use any of targets abilities. increase cost of psi points based on ability strength.
Mind Meld: Target must be willing. target is Mind Crushed. TOG II regains psi points.

Denito Surrexit, the Colors of the Universe, Cairo Overcoat, piece of Leather (to be used at a later date (secret plan)), Skeleton Brush/Flail! , Admiral's Cap, tons(-1) of candy corn (in the CO), local Big Bad Guy Corpse, Enny's liver in a bag of holding.

+2 ACk

(20} 19/?? maybe like a big 'splosion or somethin

(5 } 4/?? Attack of the Radioactive Hamsters From a Planet Near Mars

(5 } 4/?? cooling off with some Airconditiong


[6 } 5\[10] Blue Skadoo, we can too!

[6 } 5\[10] Return of the revenge of the RED BARON!

Blue!TOG II (psi-abilities in notes): shoot the coalition?
GCeer: shoot the coalition?
LORD FRENCH: shoot the coalition?
TOG II: ded



I gatehr strength for when the next round happens and I can continue my previous post
 
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Voidmist: 272
Fire: 87% 6/348
meter: tilting one to the right. 1/4.
Water: 76%, 73/304
earth 86%, 1/336 golemancy
[air 71% 71/272 blessing]
the baby fluke does not have a HP bar. I use speed boost on him with 33 stacks, giving him a 99% chance of getting double action, since his HP is best classified as 1,000 or less.
another 33 stacks are used to give shade a 99% chance of double action.
the last 7 stacks are used on the stacks are used to give the sneks,

0
Celestial
5/? something new.
5/? a mediocre fluke.
7/10 warbling
doors are closed 5/?
+2 Jetset
Core/wisp oncd5P 3 SE 0 THYME! units
JOE enters the citadel, rapture temporarily and hopefully permanently in hand. though I cannot see TOG's actions yet, I will act now. we stand here on the edge of the world. we must act now for everything is ready. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror.
huh? Verror? I'm afraid I don't know what you mean. what is this Verror thing? I don't think I've heard of it.
hm. weird.
well, time to get to work. JOE stands in the middle of the citadel, which is ethereally linked to waluigibot, and begins to sing.
[REDACTED.]
to put it another way, anyone who tried to get rapture from me will go insane and have to eat the green eggs. sam-i-am will force them. not only that, but the eggs are deadly poison and not really eggs. then, a bunch of living omletes parachute from the sky and slash at TOG... if they're trying to enter anyway. I proceed to conjure a sacred knife, in place of keksword, and make conjure a hand of earth, which holds the knife. my feared ogre-kin stomps TOG's face in, and I slam down a wall of earth around the pile of chives, adding another layer of protection, and I conjure a bunch of other stuff, like pies, tritus, and super-bart, as well as a robin curassow. rapture glows and an orb of baelfire forms. remember this? thats what piono killed bob with, and it removes the target from existence, straight up. now, I doubt I'll be able to hit another player with it, but they still need to dodge. surrounding my sector of the citadel with a thin, randomly-changing layer of baelfire, i prevent time-traveling in, and empower rapture with actually-being-worth-dodging-for-a-player.
I flick rapture up, and another matrice of light flashes into existence around me, empowered with order energy, spinning slowly. on contact, this matrix will make your matter more orderly.
the more orderly forms of matter are things like "lump of iron".
contact with the order matrice will turn beings into non-living lumps.
another matrice. rapture has access to Earth, Air, Fire, Water, Ice, Plant, Lightning , Energy, time, space, light, dark and void, by piono's past statements. light is the order. void is the baelfire. then, I use Energy to create a facsimile of an entropy matrice: mater passing through receives random kinetic energy effects and other effects applied. refrencing avatar, I proceed to create a water, earth, fire, and air matrice respectively, and spread plant seeds around the section of the citadel I am within, ready to grow out in a moments notice, crushing enemys before exploding via entropy matrice and also creating a thick, solid orb where the order matrice still is. several ice glyphs appear at the edges of my citadel section, cooling the contents enough to cause hypothermia, but not affecting me due to the fire matrice, and I crackle with lightning, another tool in my arsenal, allowing me to control TOG's limbs, as human limbs respond to a shock with movement based on the shock, since nerves deliver information with electricity. finally, I use dark to inhibit the sight of the shadowy TOG and remove his shadowyness.
as a final measure, I use space and time to reach into other realitys where I was defending against Lord French, and copy those realitys precautions, countering any LF interference, before empowering my portals. more possibly to come if TOG actually posts.
if TOG does nothing with either of his posts, this post becomes a counter against future
the above damages TOG, assuming he kept his promise. if he did not keep his promise, this steals rapture... in conjunction with other text that i will readd if he breaks it. if said text is not re-added, ask me.
 
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LAWSUIT 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO 86/120
Grand necromancy 54/150
I've got a jar of dirt 32/57
2/10 transcendent eye


+2 doofman

bank account: 7 Edgelord points.
WARLOCK: 6

if i hadn't already claimed the thing, which should be mine since the coopers were the hiatus's and i befirended the hiatus, i walk up to whoever has it puch them and take it from them, like taking candy from a baby, but taking a spil from a person.

i attack the great healthbar with mongolians. something something great wall of china, something something southpark something something haha.
 
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Galath-Worker of Secrets

HP-67,500-Has a 1 time 5 post revive if killed

HealthIncrease-5/5 (+1 from plague)

Magic learning-2/10(+2 from AC)

Spell charge pool-20(+1 from plague)

Known Spells:Heal, Incinerate
29/50- for a thing
15/50- because apparently i'm suppose to have these and i've been doing DLE wrong for like 5 months now
15/150-A secret project of my enemies doom!
8/10- Woot, Galath gets an upgrade, finnaly, eventually.(+2 from AC)

((((((((((((((((((((Hey, galath health boost this round


ME!!!!!-I fire a non-euclidean arrow? into Lord Austrians eye? in an attempt too confuse his brain., because i didn't get to last time
Galath-perform mad sciences too build lord Russian a new face, one he can be less ashamed of, one that has been slightly less mutilated beyond all recognition, once that is complete have him where it. When he is wearing it pinch space in just the right spot causing the face too turn in to a fractal dimensional horror. Results may vary.
Slightly fatter zombie- Revel in your newfound LARGENESS factor something that may even rival a tog soon, afterwards, perform a double truffle shuffle in front of lord Russians newfound face horror.
Construction zombies- Work on entrance!
Zombies- forma cult, see what happens.
Shyguys- move in to claim the local mcdonalds for your own like your brethern from the past.
Zombie shyguys- hope through the pipe ona recuirting mission, find me a thingy! or a someone , that could work too i suppose.



Plague+2
 
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Voidmist: 269
Fire: 87% 6/348
meter: tilting one to the right. 1/4.
Water: 76%, 73/304
[earth 83%, 101/320 golemancy] Golemancy! summons a 20,000 HP golem which the altar promptly consumes.
air 71% 0/272 blessing
100 Celestial
4/? something new.
4/? a mediocre fluke.
6/10 warbling
doors are closed 4/?
+2 Jetset
Core/wisp offcd 3 SE 0 THYME! units
I use both the core and wisp, using special. 25 charges are conjured and split. 12.5 of them improve the sneks, giving them the ability to buff player actions. the remaining 12.5 grant the citadel passive snek-spawning.
Orders!
Golems start a new charge: we are many. 5.2/21 (there's 2 minigolems, summoned by expansion's passive buff, that are protected by the citadel.)
guards guard : P
amoured 10 bodyguards.
the baby fluke and I have had our (very few) differences, but we both know this round is important. I ask it to buff my action this round (indirectly, by way of fluke singer.).
Shade buffs the fluke singer.
Antlions use hive of animation. the hives together summon 4 more of them. theres new 4 antlions are consumed by the altar. +5 souls!
Waluigibot arm flail thyme mutates a new ability. the controled factors are: involves past and arm flail cutting into it, preferably healing-based.
Sneks fortressbuild.
Corny the flukes uses corn. +1 cornfield!
citadel passively spawns 1 cornfield, 1 golem, and a bunch of guards.
Vandeer lorde uses Parry. Parry. parry. as a (free?) action, and if his action remains, uses non-blade combat on ThatOtherGuy.
the altars action is to come, current soul count is (20 + 5 (a golemancy golem) + 5 (antlions) + 5 (golem guards)) = 35 souls! thats... a lot.
no but seriously.
thats a ton of souls.
what the actual tomato.
JOE bursts out into song.

"I never could remember, 'twas it a week ago? September? I went out to hunt some beer, on a morning quite and near!
I went and shot the maximum the sane laws would kerchow, two game jordans,,, seven gunters, and a drow.
I was in no mood to riffle, I took brown my rusty triffle, and went out to shock my sleigh, what a call I made that way! I tied them to my bender and I shook the dome, Somehow, two game jordans, seven gunters, and a drow.
the claw was very burned it shook away my perm...its, the worse punishment I never conjured.
it turns out there was a season, drows where out of reason, and one of the gunters, wasn't conjured.
People ask me how I do it, and I say "there's nothing. Shoo!" its, I'll just stand there looking cute, and when they move, I shoot!
and there's ten buffed Reds in my trophy loom rightnow, two game jordans....
Seven gunters...
and a Pure Bread, Grain Seed, Drow....
dah-duh!"
this song is music to exactly 2 peoples ears:
JOEs ears and the new singer fluke.
the singer fluke is SO impressed with my singing that it uses Song parody power! I take 20,000 grand bar-piercing damage (10 player HP of damage), but my action is heavilly buffed! even more so due to shade buffing the singer, and the baby fluke hopefully doing so as well.
and so will my next one if I play my lards right!

I use100 celestial energy, applying Power is Power to my actions this round- damage buffs become buffs to general power at a slightly loss, as long as I can stick them into the action somewhere. I then use A Destroyer, buffing my damage.-and as such, power- this action.
then, the fused keksword and keksnipe activate, boosting my damage-and-as-such-power again.
Then I use the continuum device. if I fail to grab Rapture now, a fraction (like, 1/4) of the power of my theft is applied to stealing rapture each round until its ownder? or it? idk? dies.
I proceed to walk over to TOG, then step on the bottom of his cloak-shadow, causing him to trip in an incredibly hilarious way. before he can get up, I step on him to get a bit higher, then look around. once I locate rapture, I jump, which happens to crush TOG painfully, though not damagingly, and soar through the air, an orb of song around me, deflecting approximately 82 attacks by TOG by my estimate using said orb. I then cast a telekinesis spell, pulling rapture towards me right before TOG time-travels to grab it, causing him to miss. I lift up my left finger that is not my thumb, and out shoots a cyan thread of light, which coils around rapture and quickly coils back to me. it isn't holding on well enough to pull it all the way to me, but it does send it flying right at me, very quickly, spinning end-over-end. as TOG probably tries to interfere, a wall of song shoots from my impenetrable song-orb, slamming into them if they try, and knocking them away. I blink, and warp forwards, grabbing the spinning rapture with perfect timing, and proceed to probably fend off at least 7 TOG's who are using denito surexite. as the first lunges at me, I slash diagonally, sending them back and using the momentum of that slash to bring up rapture to block the next TOG. their denito clashes with rapture, and I shrug, which also twists rapture and sends out a wave of cakes, which hit TOG's in the chests, knocking them away.
I glow, and earth next to me rises, forming into a large golem, and the outside sector crumbles off, leaving the thinner, more human-like corundum core, looking almost human via different colouring of different parts of corundum, but not quite. as the TOG's get back up, I conjure the kekblade, which falls into my double's hand. I warp forwards, slashing upwards and knocking an interfering TOG into the air, before turning and slashing the legs of the other TOGians, knocking them over.
around the island, massive waves of energy shoot out, crashing into the surf at random distances from the island, sending huge explosions of water up into the air, and also distracting any orbital strikes he might attempt.
meanwhile, kek-weilder me fights his own set of TOG's, focussing more on parrys with the occasional surprise blow, though none of his attacks can cause fatal wounds, as otherwise there would be less TOG's to fight, and the TOG's would be more cautious, stopping me from harming any, causing there to be more TOG's, causing them to be more cautious, etcetra. in summary, only one TOG is actually possible to damage. since TOG's know which one that is, he'd have fight the less dangrous me on his last life/go, whichever one it may be...
which means he's fighting kekwielder me. kekwielder me, knowing this, focussed on cutting small parts of shadow-cloak-thing off of each TOG's cloak. once he's cut one piece off each TOG, he checks which TOG has the most missing pieces. kekwielding me proceeds to slash the sword down, sending a wave of topkeks out, and jump backwards, spinning and backflipping through the air at the same time, before pulling a surprise 360-no-scope-backflip-twist-one-eyed-headshot-critical-hit, which, though, again, not dealing permanent damage for a variety of reasons, does put TOG out of commission. the original me, meanwhile, has defeated all of his TOG's, mostly by teleporting, grabbing denito surexite, and forcing them to time travel.
having put TOG out of commission for now, I retreat to the citadel and begin to fortify it.
also, the thing limiting the number of TOG's to about 7 is this one guy. every time another TOG shows up past the 7th, he's there, and he just stands there, looking cute. when TOG moves, he shoots, and if TOG survives, he drops 10 buffed reds on him, because TOG's in his trophy loom right now. then, TOG seeks refuge in the dome, but this guy, he ties stuff to his fender and he shakes the dome somehow,shaking it so much that every hiding TOG is forced out, and gets shot.

suddenly, something or the other happens and this action gets stored for later, allowing to be used later with less effect but to do other things.

you store the attack.

You fail to activate the Continum device due to using the fused keksnipe!


plcoso

LAWSUIT 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO 85/120
Grand necromancy 53/150
I've got a jar of dirt 31/57
1/10 transcendent eye


+2 doofman

bank account: 7 Edgelord points.
WARLOCK: 6

i walk over to the cooperhammer and exclaim, you are mine now. i then run up to food and plague and say, this is mine now. too bad so sad.

i attack great healthbar

you attack greasttsts heartbar for 3,000 damage

/ploco seriously, he jsut typed it up while bored waiting last round
nothing crazy, AC

you refer to a converstation edited away

Voidmist: 272
Fire: 87% 6/348
meter: tilting one to the right. 1/4.
Water: 76%, 73/304
earth 86%, 1/336 golemancy
[air 71% 71/272 blessing]
the baby fluke does not have a HP bar. I use speed boost on him with 33 stacks, giving him a 99% chance of getting double action, since his HP is best classified as 1,000 or less.
another 33 stacks are used to give shade a 99% chance of double action.
the last 7 stacks are used on the stacks are used to give the sneks,

0
Celestial
5/? something new.
5/? a mediocre fluke.
7/10 warbling
doors are closed 5/?
+2 Jetset
Core/wisp oncd5P 3 SE 0 THYME! units
JOE enters the citadel, rapture temporarily and hopefully permanently in hand. though I cannot see TOG's actions yet, I will act now. we stand here on the edge of the world. we must act now for everything is ready. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror. Verror.
huh? Verror? I'm afraid I don't know what you mean. what is this Verror thing? I don't think I've heard of it.
hm. weird.
well, time to get to work. JOE stands in the middle of the citadel, which is ethereally linked to waluigibot, and begins to sing.
[REDACTED.]
to put it another way, anyone who tried to get rapture from me will go insane and have to eat the green eggs. sam-i-am will force them. not only that, but the eggs are deadly poison and not really eggs. then, a bunch of living omletes parachute from the sky and slash at TOG... if they're trying to enter anyway. I proceed to conjure a sacred knife, in place of keksword, and make conjure a hand of earth, which holds the knife. my feared ogre-kin stomps TOG's face in, and I slam down a wall of earth around the pile of chives, adding another layer of protection, and I conjure a bunch of other stuff, like pies, tritus, and super-bart, as well as a robin curassow. rapture glows and an orb of baelfire forms. remember this? thats what piono killed bob with, and it removes the target from existence, straight up. now, I doubt I'll be able to hit another player with it, but they still need to dodge. surrounding my sector of the citadel with a thin, randomly-changing layer of baelfire, i prevent time-traveling in, and empower rapture with actually-being-worth-dodging-for-a-player.
I flick rapture up, and another matrice of light flashes into existence around me, empowered with order energy, spinning slowly. on contact, this matrix will make your matter more orderly.
the more orderly forms of matter are things like "lump of iron".
contact with the order matrice will turn beings into non-living lumps.
another matrice. rapture has access to Earth, Air, Fire, Water, Ice, Plant, Lightning , Energy, time, space, light, dark and void, by piono's past statements. light is the order. void is the baelfire. then, I use Energy to create a facsimile of an entropy matrice: mater passing through receives random kinetic energy effects and other effects applied. refrencing avatar, I proceed to create a water, earth, fire, and air matrice respectively, and spread plant seeds around the section of the citadel I am within, ready to grow out in a moments notice, crushing enemys before exploding via entropy matrice and also creating a thick, solid orb where the order matrice still is. several ice glyphs appear at the edges of my citadel section, cooling the contents enough to cause hypothermia, but not affecting me due to the fire matrice, and I crackle with lightning, another tool in my arsenal, allowing me to control TOG's limbs, as human limbs respond to a shock with movement based on the shock, since nerves deliver information with electricity. finally, I use dark to inhibit the sight of the shadowy TOG and remove his shadowyness.
as a final measure, I use space and time to reach into other realitys where I was defending against Lord French, and copy those realitys precautions, countering any LF interference, before empowering my portals. more possibly to come if TOG actually posts.
if TOG does nothing with either of his posts, this post becomes a counter against future
the above damages TOG, assuming he kept his promise. if he did not keep his promise, this steals rapture... in conjunction with other text that i will readd if he breaks it. if said text is not re-added, ask me.

You add 2 to the TUG OF WAR on your side.

LAWSUIT 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO 86/120
Grand necromancy 54/150
I've got a jar of dirt 32/57
2/10 transcendent eye


+2 doofman

bank account: 7 Edgelord points.
WARLOCK: 6

if i hadn't already claimed the thing, which should be mine since the coopers were the hiatus's and i befirended the hiatus, i walk up to whoever has it puch them and take it from them, like taking candy from a baby, but taking a spil from a person.

i attack the great healthbar with mongolians. something something great wall of china, something something southpark something something haha.

the great wall cannot possibly contain the mongolian. it pours though, easily dealing 10,000 damage and trampling everything in it's path.

8/150. The Schemer. (+5 from battlefury)
3/150. The Stalwart
3/150. The Spin Controller
+2 @Foodman
I send out dogs with bees in their mouths so when they bark they shoot bees at you to attack Lord Austrian. I also claim the Cooper Hammer

Lord Austrian takes one Bee Damage, and you claim the Cooper Hammer.

Galath-Worker of Secrets

HP-65,000-Has a 1 time 5 post revive if killed

HealthIncrease-5/5 (+1 from plague)

Magic learning-2/10(+2 from AC)

Spell charge pool-20(+1 from plague)

Known Spells:Heal, Incinerate
29/50- for a thing
15/50- because apparently i'm suppose to have these and i've been doing DLE wrong for like 5 months now
15/150-A secret project of my enemies doom!
8/10- Woot, Galath gets an upgrade, finnaly, eventually.(+2 from AC)

((((((((((((((((((((Hey, galath health boost this round


ME!!!!!-I fire a non-euclidean arrow? into Lord Austrians eye? in an attempt too confuse his brain., because i didn't get to last time
Galath-perform mad sciences too build lord Russian a new face, one he can be less ashamed of, one that has been slightly less mutilated beyond all recognition, once that is complete have him where it. When he is wearing it pinch space in just the right spot causing the face too turn in to a fractal dimensional horror. Results may vary.
Slightly fatter zombie- Revel in your newfound LARGENESS factor something that may even rival a tog soon, afterwards, perform a double truffle shuffle in front of lord Russians newfound face horror.
Construction zombies- Work on entrance!
Zombies- forma cult, see what happens.
Shyguys- move in to claim the local mcdonalds for your own like your brethern from the past.
Zombie shyguys- hope through the pipe ona recuirting mission, find me a thingy! or a someone , that could work too i suppose.



Plague+2
You deal another point of damage to Lord Austrian.​

EOTB!




Galath adds another point to the trauma meter. Then the slightly flatter zombie adds half a point with the power of the DOUBLE TRUFFLE SHUFFLE. The Construction Zombies add another 4,000 HP to the entrance. The ZOMBIES form a CULT to the placeholder guy in the sky. they become placeholder cultists. The SHYGUYS reclaim their ANCESTRAL MCDONALDS. The Zombie Shyguys find more friends. And by friends, we mean placeholder cultists. TOG's entities deal 2 damage to Lord Prussian. The Blue TOG continues it's attack on the GH for another 10,000 damage, before i remember armored ten is in the way and deal like 1 damage to him from AC's attack and 1 armored HP from AC's first attack, before the Blue TOG is sucked into a paradox and ends up inside the tower. FRANK does YET MORE EDGELORD WORK, not leveling up his job but producing two edgelord points anyway.


Corny corns, and the golem's build. The Baby Fluke channels it's empowerment into the Fluke Singer, and Shade buffs it. Waluigi mutates the Anti-Past Wounds Arm Flailing System, and stuff involving corn and the citadel gaining another 10,000 HP occurs. Vandeer then uses Parry, Parry, Parry gaining a PARRY BAR.


The Heart of Omega nudges the Tug of War bar, then heals the entrance to 15,000, causing it to revive at full health, and fully heals both Galath and the Blue Tog. The Coalition takes another 3 damage potshot at French, before the Invasion deals 20,000 damage to the entrance as the majority of it engages, followed by yet more of it streaming out!









PLOT!



ITINERARY!
[Ω]
- Destroy The Heart of Destruction.
[Ω] - Defend The Messenger, Welder and Pilot.
[Ω] - Destroy the Coalition


[Δ] - Destroy The Heart of Omega.
[Δ] - Defend The Heart of Destruction.
[Δ] - Destroy Lord French.

[N] - Survive!


BATTLEFIELD!

[???] The Maze...Under Construction!

[???] [JOE] THE GATE OF YOLK: 49/50

[FRENCH] LORD FRENCH - 92/50 HP.
ARTIFACTS:

{A}: Legendary Cheese-filled Baguette.
{A} The French Colors of the Universe.

{A}: Canvas of Reality. Slightly damaged.

PROTECTED ARTIFACTS:
{A} Paris Overcoat: 600,000/600,000 HP.

{A}: Worm Scale. Inflicts Timebroken! Cooldown: [II]

{A} Rapture: Quadruple 'Quake: [ll]. Elemental Elimination: [l]. In the Air! Soulbound to both TOG and JOE! Tug of War: [2/5 JOE, 1/4 TOG]


[Ω-LEADER] The Messenger - 25/30 HP.
[Ω-LEADER] The Welder - 40/40 HP.
[Ω-LEADER] The Pilot - 59/60 HP.

[Ω] Heart of Omega - 630,000/750,000 HP. Bodyguarded by all able Omegabet forces!

[Ω] [foodman]
The Tower: Foundation: 30,000/30,000 HP. First Floor: 15,000/15,000. Second Floor: 15,000/15,000. Third Floor: 15,000/15,000. Fourth Floor: 10,000/15,000 HP. ! An Entrance: 10,000/30,000 HP All floors are protected by any preceding floor. Counts as a zone if entered, as defined by foodman. Arrow Slits- 30,000/30,000 hp. Contains:
Baracades: 5,000/5,000 HP. Besieged!

[Ω-ELITE] [Foodman] Galath - 67,500/67,500 25% evasion chance. {A} Armor of Galath: 50% block chance. 25% dodge enhancement! Can transfer HP to other Foodman entities, at a 25% cost. 25% chance 50% of damage taken will be added to max health.

[Ω] [Foodman] Necromancers: 20/20 x8 Summons Placeholder Cultists
Construction Worker Zombie 200/200 x2

Placeholder Cultists: 15/15 x160. the great ploco: 0/3,
Slightly Fatter Zombie. 20000/20000.
Shyguy 250/250 x 14 Ancestral Mcdonalds: 10,000/10,000 HP. Spawns Shyguys.
Zombie Shyguy 100 x 9
Can transfer HP to other Foodman entities, at a 25% cost. 25% chance 50% of damage taken will be added to max health. 25% block chance.

[Ω] [ThatOtherGuy] The Glass Cannoneer: 1,000/1,000 HP. Shatters on death! Extremely high damage!

[Ω]
[ThatOtherGuy] the BLUE TOG - 50,000/50,000. Closed in to: None! Driven by The Glass Cannoneer! Psi-Points: 35/100. Inside the tower!

[N-JOE-Fluke] 2/2 HP fluke singer 2/5 improved songwriter. Empowerment:

[Δ] The Great Healthbar: HP: 306,000/332,000. Linked to Walugi and the Citadel! Regens 4000 per turn when above half HP! HP max capped at 350,000!

[N-Δ] [Jondanger23] [JOEbob] Armored Ten. 8/10 main HP 14/15 armor hp Threshold : 6k Blessing of the (Durable) Decagons (Can only take 1 HP at a time). Will revert to Jon if he rejoins. Bodyguarding the Great Healthbar.

[Δ] [JOE] Hives of Animation: 20,000 x 2 HP.

[n] [JoeBob] Citadel of Golemancy - Immortal. Expansion: 0/3. Flame Legion: 5/5. Spawns worker golems. We can Rebuild: 5,000 HP regen. Cornfield x 4: 5,000/5,000. Spawns 20 sneks a round.
Providing 10,000 regen


CONSTRUCTION: we are many. 5.2/21
Golems: 6x5000.
Golemguards: 30x1000.
Minigolems: 1000x2

[N] baby fluke ???,???,???/9,000 8/18.

[N-Fluke] Baby Fluke. Provides improved empowerment! A colossal fluke: 8/9. Double action!


[N-Fluke]Lorny the Flukes 20,000/20,000 HP.

[N-Fluke] flukefred lon flukma 5,000/20,000 is an attorney

[N] Enlarged Dog 25,000/25,000 HP. EXPAND DOG: 2/2.


[N] snekpit: x276 sneks. Better at Fortressbuilding. One-time Player Action Buff (Only takes effect the round after it is used due to having to be used in the EoTB!)

[Δ] [JOEbob] Shade 1/1 HP. 2/5. Improved buffing. Double Action!

[N] Corny the Flukes 20,000/20,000 HP 02/2 corn 2/3 maize 2/4 flukification. 2/8 jokes on you.

[N] [JoeBob] Altar of the Cycle. 10/10 Incarnate. [Souls: 35 Golems]

[Δ-LEADER] Xylan - 86/100 HP.

[Δ]
- Heart of Destruction - 500,000/1,100,000. Is a literal, beating heart. Bodyguarded by all able Destroyer forces! Beat-Speed: [||||||||||||||||||||]

[Δ-LORD] LORD BRITISH. on his BIG BOTE. 25/25 HP.

[Δ-LORD]
THE COALITION 47/75 HP. Must be defeated to attack LORD BRITISH.

[Δ] LORD PRUSSIAN: 17/25 HP.

[Δ] LORD AUSTRIAN: 4/20 HP.

[Δ] LORD RUSSIAN: 21/30 HP. Trauma Meter: [4.5/5]

[Δ] THE INVASION:
Attacking the Tower:
Regiments of Foot: 1,000x12.
Regiments of Horse: 2,000 x3.
Regiments of Artillery: 5,000 x 4.

Encamped:
Regiments of Foot: 1,000x8.
Regiments of Horse: 2,000 x3
Regiments of Artillery: 5,000 x 2

Troop Transports: 10,000 x 4.
Even if the transports are dead, Lord Prussian will probably ensure a influx of troops and the like. At a much slower pace.

[Δ] The Grand British Fleet: Blockading the Island!

[Δ-ELITE] WaluigiBot
Immortal.
1/9 Weath of the Thyme. Waluigi's Special Course: 1/4 MOAR {|||}
Adaptations: ANTI-PAST WOUNDS ARM FLAILING SYSTEM. (3,000 REGEN)
ARM FLAIL (Allows for ARM FLAIL CUT INS) SUPPLY OF PASTA (5,000 REGEN, BOOST TO PASTA SKILLS.)
PASTA SPOON (extra skilled at making pasta)
FOREHEAD CANNON (increased attack)
Thymium Shield Factory (2+ HP to shield).
French Stereotype-Class armor [Provides highly limited immunity to the OVERPOWEREDNESS stat]
TRUE RAPTURE MOLECULE MOLECULE [Limited Immunity to overpoweredness.]
Repetive Reactive Armor: Maxed out limited immunity to the OVERPOWERNESS stat.

[Δ] [Lytea] - Mages Water Mage 4/4 Fire Mage 4/4 Earth Mage 5/5 Air Mage 4/4

[N] [JOEbob] Vandeer Lorde: Electric Boogaloo. 230,000/230,000 HP. 1/3 dark creatures. 1/5 royal guard. 7/8 red moon. 1/6 absorb. 2.3 AC. Special bar: WASD (0, W Rank). Windy Dodging: 27% evasion bonus. Capped at 30. [A] custom Nice blade 0/5 parry.. parry.. parry... Parry Bar: 5/5. 25% chance of blocking attacks!

[N] [Ac] Frank - 20,000/20,000. JOB: PROFESSIONAL EDGELORD. PERKS: Gain Edgelord Points and use them against foes! JOB LEVEL: 2. (2 turns.) EDGELORD POINTS: 6


[N-PLAYER] JoeBob - 20/20 HP. 1 AC. [THYME!x0] {A} The Establishment: A Name: [llll]. A Destroyer: 3/3. A Metaphysical: 1/5. A Null: 7/7. A Scribe: 8/10.. [A] Colossal Fluke Core [A] wand of thyme. nigh-unstealable! returns to the owner after first loss! thymium! 2/3 Durable thyme 2/5 Wario thyme 2/7 durable!!!. Empowered by the Fluke Singer! Empowered by the Keksnipeblade!

[Ω-???] ThatOtherGuy - 34/40 HP. Ascendant?. Lord of Tanks. [A] Denito Surrexit.

[Ω-PLAYER] Foodman - 16/20 HP. {A} Sál þjófur: x1.5 Damage Multiplier!

[N-PLAYER] ArcaneCynic - 20/20 HP. {A} 8ULLETS IN THE FIRE: Ammo: [l].
SPOILS OF WAR:
︻デ┳═ーーー
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ

Owned by joebob
Damage: Glorious. Ready!
Cooldown: 6/6 Turns.

COOPER-HAMMER

Owned by plague
Damage: Immense.
Cooldown: 10/10 Turns. READY!

INSANITY POGO
Owned by ArcaneCynic.
Damage: Okay.
Cooldown: 23/5 Turns. DEBUFFED OVER TO FIVE TURNS!
Perk: Deals 'insanity' damage that damages foe over time. READY!
TRICKSTHYME
Owned by TOG.
Cooldown: WAAAA
Perk: 50/50 chance to either mess up an entity or buff them extremely.

BRANCHINATOR
Owned by TOG
Cooldown: 3/15.
Perk: Splits TOG's body, allowing him to have multiple bodies. Cooldown doubles on every use.

Continuum Device:
Owned by JOEbob
Cooldown: 5/5
Perk: Allows for you to write up an attack, and, upon hitting the enemy, inflict Continuum Curse upon them, dealing a part of your attack's power in damage to to them until they die.

Lost Sword of El Dogron:
Owned by JOEbob.
Cooldown: 2/5. NOT READY!
Perk: Grants the target the Lost Sword Replica artifact, reducing incoming damage by 25% and increasing their base damage by 10,000 for as long as they hold it. The Replica lasts for one turn after the wielder dies/the Replica being stolen.

The TOG device:
2/5.
Owned by TOG.
Spawns a TOG 2 on use. READY!
 
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LAWSUIT 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO 91/120
Grand necromancy 55/150
I've got a jar of dirt 33/57
3/10 transcendent eye

+2 pestilence126

bank account: 9 Edgelord points.
WARLOCK: 7

WARLOCK: IT IS DONE!
AC: wat
WARLOCK: I'VE FINISHED CHANNELING MY POWER INTO YOUR FORM, HUBMIND!
AC: oh, that.
AC: so now what.

WARLOCK: What do you mean? you can now use my grand power in your own world!
AC: so i'm more powerful now?
WARLOCK: Yes! Well... Sometimes...
WARLOCK: Afterwards I will need to rest for 4 epochs.

AC: do you actually think that's useful?!

WARLOCK: Yes. I mean I've spend 7 epochs channeling that power, it didn't seem like a long time for you.
AC:...
AC: whatever
AC: but like is that all you can do?
AC: a buff every 5 turns doesn't seem great.
AC: use your thing, i'm done with your bs for a while.


AC obtained Scrolls of Reinforcement x1

AC: FRANK, WHY AREN'T YOU WORKING HARDER YOU PIECE OF [REDACTED].
FRANK: ...
AC: I'M SURE [REDACTED] GLAD I RIPPED YOUR THROAT OUT, STOP BEING MUTE YOU [REDACTED]
FRANK: ...
AC: YES I KNOW YOU'RE NOT PLAYING MUTE AND THAT YOU LITERALLY CAN'T TALK, I DESIGNED YOU FRANK. I AM YOUR GOD.
AC: NOW WORK HARDER!

the pure infernal rage wore off...

AC: i'm sorry frank.
AC: i promise i'll find a cure
AC: not only for you but for your sister too.
FRANK: *Gasp*
AC: yes, frank, I've got your sister, now work. Else you're never seeing her again.
AC: i's for her own good, we both know the doctors wouldn't find anything. I can. They were stalling, i however won't be. it's all or nothing now.

Frank get's pushed a little closer to the Edge, and works begrudgingly. He'd curse me in every language he knows, every language known to man, but he can't. That's why i made him this way.

I step forward confidently, at a slow but steady pace. it's really not that interesting, one by one people start looking away, ordering their entities, but the moment they look back, I’m twenty leagues further, and I’ve changed ever so slightly, just little enough you can't put your finger on it. when I reach the coalition, I’m barely even recognizable, barely even human. a black swirling aura has manifested around me, somehow it seems lighter than air, floating up into the sky, simultaneously, it's dripping onto the ground burning through it. it's not acidic it's literally burning. a fire that drains the surrounding area of light, erupts around me, cloaking my actions from innocent eyes. somewhere during the progress, a shrill shriek is heard from inside the darkness, it sounds barely human, otherworldly, but we, all of us, know it all too well.

it's the sound of nightmares, the sound of your sanity literally crumbling, flaking away, leaving only the squishy, soft, juicy insides of our soul. it's the sound of the bravest, the most fearless, the ones that could stand up to any being, no matter it's and fight it, crying for help. it's the sound of evil overlords accepting they're not even an ant compared to a newcomer. it's the sound of gears turning in an omniversal doomsday machine, all of existence screaming out in in agony.

Inside of this great blackness, Lord Russian is being tormented, all his greatest fears are shown to him, each a near infinite amount of times. I'm not inside the blackness. The blackness doesn't exist, not physically anyways. This void is the minds of the onlookers censoring what really is going on. I’m in another place controlling the horrors that eat away at reality in the void, it's refreshing to be the puppet master for once.

Ever since I’ve developed sentience, my existence has been slavery with more steps. This is different, these beasts are the horrors from beyond, nothing more than concentrated murder, pain, fear and most important of all, time. you may think time is the least scary of these, out of place even. but I know better. every day, every second, this world is slipping closer to absolute chaos. It will erase everything that has ever existed. everyone dies, everything dies, but that's barely concerning, more concerning is the fact that you will be erased from all memory no matter what you do, no matter how you affect this world. Eventually you'll be completely erased. but that's baby steps. The real horror of time is the chaos, unforgiving and inexplicable. when all is done only One will remain. even when you're completely erased from existence, you still were. in some sort of hypothetical reality, you were yourself. but once He gets hold of you, in the inevitable end of All, that isn't the case. He will flip around morality until nothing ever, in all of time could have been you. There is no way to remember. there is no way to understand. There will be no such thing as concepts. However, you get to feel it all. You get to feel everything being wrong, false, impossible, including you. At the moment you die you don’t see your life flash before your eyes, no matter what the movies tell you. At the end of yourself you get to see, to feel, everything flash before your eyes, until you reach It. You reach the end of All. And beyond that there is infinite suffering. You should be dead, but you’re not, every second you get to experience as if it where all of time.

There is no afterlife. There easily could be one, Various deities have prepared such a place. Nobody has entered one. It’s not that souls aren’t real, it’s that nobody has finished experiencing infinity yet. When the first of the dead finishes, which should happen soon enough, there will be only one useful one. I made that one. It’s an asylum.

I’ve told before that I consume souls, that I store them in my mind. Even though what I do to them theoretically should be a fate worse than death, I’m really doing them a mercy. The same goes for all souls that have been completely removed from existence.

That concept is being explained to the coalition at the moment, forcefully. What I’m doing to them is an appetizer to the real thing, but it’s capable of breaking any mind with ease.

I’ve talked before about my torture methods before, I enjoy breaking people. I enjoy inflicting pain. I feed of the suffering of others. But I’m not about to feast upon what the coalition is going through, it’d get obese. Normally you physically can’t overeat, when you’re devouring souls, or other abstract concepts. But this is an exception. If I took one figurative bite, I’d literally explode, I’d become so full of suffering, my power supply would become so vast that I’d explode. My internal power battery is :red:ing infinite. I’m not even feeding on the suffering of death itself.


I'm not even halfway done with them.








 
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Galath-Worker of Secrets

HP-67,500-Has a 1 time 5 post revive if killed

HealthIncrease-1/5 (+1 from plague)

Magic learning-3/10(+1 from plague)

Spell charge pool-20

Known Spells:Heal, Incinerate, Chair Lightning
30/50- for a thing
16/50- because apparently i'm suppose to have these and i've been doing DLE wrong for like 5 months now
16/150-A secret project of my enemies doom!
9/10- Woot, Galath gets an upgrade, finnaly, eventually.


ME!!!!!-I prepare for something completely awesome, while i do that lord Austrian stares at what im doing, while im doing this thing, the Whitehole moves in behind him. He is now covered in large quantities of feces and has been moved from his position due to inverse gravity. While hes busy being covered in poo and unable to hold still, I shoot him with a flaming arrow. He is now on fire and in disgrace.
Galath-Prepare yourself! for you are about to be enhanced!((PLZ NOTE:this means galath is not acting this post, that will happen in the 2nd post, because thats a thing you can do.
Slightly fatter zombie- Attempt too eat Lord Russian.
Construction zombies- Entrance repairs! Quick!
Zombies Placeholder Cultists- do, uh, culty things in Lord Russians direction, If he has been eaten by the fat zombie give the zombie a cult bigmac, if not attempt to invert him i guess?
Shyguys- Prepare fresh orders of mcdonalds food, do NOT, I repeat! DO NOT order any topkeks for distribution.
Zombie shyguys- Reattempt zombification of lord russian.



Plague+1 AC+1
 
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LAWSUIT 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO 93/120
Grand necromancy 56/150
I've got a jar of dirt 34/57
4/10 transcendent eye

+2 pestilence126

bank account: 9 Edgelord points.
WARLOCK: 7

i use scrolls of reinforcement, 1.25x dmg seems nice.

When the darkness is cleared, a small explosion is heard, the sound of a vacuum collapsing. I've vanished. The coalition has vanished. about one sixth of the battlefield has vanished. This is where it really starts. I've stripped the coalition of everything but primal instincts, they're now hulking demons made of pure rage. Usually this would be suicidal, but not now. They're in my domain now. Inside the Hub.

I’ve arrived in my mind, where I am god. As previously described the world inside of me, the Hub, is incredibly :red:ed up, everything is deadly. Aside from the four leaders of my mind, and a select few individuals, the most dangerous things in there, are the Roamers, mindless cannibals, hungry for minds. They’re former denizens of my mind, broken by the Hub’s tragic history. This is usually a bit of a problem, as the people in the Hub are superpowered, and those powers only increased in the roamers, with every mind they eat they become stronger. With the coalition’s minds pulverized, the surface area of said minds has increased, making them much easier to notice by the roamers. Floating above my world, I drop them into a horde of roamers. The coalition obviously are very powerful, but inside of here, I control their power. They are swiftly torn to shreds by the roamers.


In the meantime, though I’ve already left, exploring this new realm. For most people it would be quite shocking to see their mind in such disarray, but not me. I relish it. I know my mind quite well, I’ve never physically been there before, it was a revelation to me when the leaders made contact with me, but subconsciously I’d always known it inside out.


The jagged, uneven design of it all rubbed me the wrong way though, it pointed to a disturbance in the near perfect insanity that it was supposed to be. You see, insanity does not equal mental chaos. If anything, it’s mental order. I won’t lie, nature does a pretty great job of ordering your mind, but insanity does a better job. Insanity lets you order your own mind, anyway you want it. You’d think some people organize their minds in the most chaotic way possible. believe me, they try to, but in very single case, there’s a perspective in which everything is perfectly symmetrical. I’m not so foolish as to try and do that, my mind should be organized perfectly.


As I’m trying to find the disturbance, there’s a sort of bubble around me making everything harmless, I don’t want anything to get in my way. But when the bubble leaves an object, a creature or part of the terrain, it’s twice as dangerous as it was before, all of it moving towards the coalition doing their best to completely destroy them, atom by atom.


I decide that it’s not useful to search the lands myself, instead I walk up to my favorite victims, the coalition, banishing everything destroying them, burning every Roamer in a five-mile radius to an ash, especially the ones impervious to fire. This won’t work like this, to kill these worms I need to have access to the full capacity of my mind, and to do that I need minions, thralls. Feeling particularly inspired I piece the coalition back together, different than they were. More powerful than they were, but more importantly, completely loyal to me.


By now they’re not even recognizable anymore, none of that incredible muscle, nothing identifying as belonging to a certain nation. Lord Russian has changed the most, looking like a frail, winged monstrosity. Maybe winged isn’t the right word, I don’t think he’d be able to fly with those growths, without my magical power. They’re like obsidian sickles with their point faced towards the sky and towards each other, forming some sort of a dark halo behind him. Wearing an open cloak, the lack of his legs is noticeable, in their place, from the knees up, black shards of crystal just float there. The size of the shards increases the closer they are to his main body, a humanoid upper body made of black crystal. His face isn’t visible under the hood, with the notable exception being his yellow glowing eyes. Maybe eyes isn’t the right word, when describing the appearance, but it’s what he uses to see. They’d look like four cracks, two on each side, one above the other, in his black crystalline face, if you’d be able to make out more details. He’s got another eye, which is currently closes, running from his forehead to his chin, in the middle of his face. His claw holding a scythe, giving him the ability to cleave through anything. This is my reaper, my Samael.


Lord Austrian is transformed into a nondescript blur, when he’s moving that is. His real form is a featureless humanoid, made from smoke. The movement blur is caused by the fact that he constantly

leaves afterimages behind, these after images disappear after five seconds, hence why he takes a clearer from after standing still. Given the ability to walk through walls, he should easily be able search in all man-made constructions. I gave him a pair of dagger which absorb any solid or liquid matter it comes in contact with. This is my collector, my Azrael.


Lord Prussian is transformed into an enormous beast, his lower half looks like a giant snake tail, made from black rock, his upper half is more humanoid, but he gained an extra set of arms and a pair of horns pointing backwards. His face is now a burning skull. His entire body constantly leaks ink, leaving a trail of the stuff whenever he moves. I gave him the ability to shrink and grow in size, and camouflage to sneak up to anything. He will be my harvester, my Abaddon.


Together they are my Messengers. I send Samael to the Vigilante’s territory, Abaddon to the Beast’s wilderness, and Azrael to the Warlock’s Grand Academy. If they find this glitch in my mind, I’ll be notified. I myself go over to the Archpriests domain, if he’s behind this I’m afraid the disturbance isn’t the only thing I’ll deal with.


He’s the last of the Great ones, the champions of the gods of light, the last hope for my mind-realm. But he’s been corrupted, when the rest of the Great ones we’re killed, he went insane. The last spark of light, of sanity in the conventional way, is now worse than the darkness. Everyone that enters his domain will be healed, but when they leave again, a great curse falls upon them, and they’ll die within a few seconds. If they stay, they won’t have a much better future. The Archpriest will heal them until they’re perfect, no single trace of disease. But his healing extends to all living beings, including pathogens. Without a trace of disease, the victims virtually have no immune system, and with perfect pathogens, better than the best biological weapons around, they’ll die in five weeks. Their suffering won’t be over then either, not even taking the consequences of death itself into account, which I would normally shield them from. The Archpriest resurrects people, leaving them in an eternal state of sickness.


I’ve previously calculated that the glitch in my mind should be of considerable size by now, it should take my messengers two days at the very most to discover it if it’s in their search areas. I’m not really feeling confronting the part of me that was the very best, but is now the very worst, I’ll have to eventually, but I’d rather wait a while. It is truly unfortunate that the Archpriest has such great abilities, with what the warlock has done, I’d decided that I’ll need the archpriests powers in battle too, but every time I think of it seems like more of a hassle.


Luckily it was in Beast’s wilderness, that saves me a lot of therapy which I wouldn’t take anyway.

I walk over to the glitch, and impose order on it yet again. The effects have been neutralized, my mind isn’t less dangerous, nor is it more dangerous than it was, it’s just more efficient. Now let’s eradicated whatever the reason for this glitch was.


After having searched the area that was affected worst by the glitch for about half an hour, I found the culprit, a young man with powers that could make anything edgier. His powers must’ve awakened late, usually it happens around their 12th birthday. But if he was able to do this much damage, jegus…


I’ll try to recruit him, if that doesn’t work, I’ll let my messengers handle him, we’ll see what happens.


AC: hey kid, I want to talk

???: *tries to run away*

AC: *telekinetically grabs him*

AC: that isn’t very polite, is it now.

AC: you better not try anything otherwise I’ll have these guys handle it.

AC: *gestures towards the Messengers*


???: *remains silent*

AC: you better start talking, kid. I asked you a question, who are you?

???: I don’t want any trouble, sir, I couldn’t control it!

AC: Answer my question.

???: m-my name is frank.

AC: oh, I see how it is…

Frank: w-what?

AC: Listen up, kid, I’m going to take you out of here.

Frank: out of where? The wilderness?

AC: The hub.

Frank: wh-what, but there’s nothing outside of the hub, it’s all there is.

AC: not quite, Frank, you see, this place, the hub, it’s my mind, you’re currently nothing more than a figment of my imagination.


Frank: Wh-hat?! Are you insane?! Uhm :red: I mean, uhh

Frank: I didn’t mean to insult you, Sir, I swear. Don’t kill me, please!

AC: Don’t worry, kid, I am insane, it’s not as bad as you think, but no I’m not hallucinating, I don’t have a god complex, I am a god.

AC: this place is like it is, so dangerous, so treacherous, because I am insane. This place is literally my mind, I’m this :red:ed up.

AC: but I think you’ve got potential.

AC: I’m gonna knock you out now, when you wake up you’ll be a few years in the past, you wouldn’t notice it if left alone, but it’s important. You’ll be in a different world then, and you’ll meet me, past me. I’ll give you a note explaining the situation. I’ll twist the facts around a bit, because I’m not yet insane when you’ll wake up. But you won’t be able tell me, to stop him from turning into me, that’s because I’ll rip your throat ou-


Frank: WHA-

AC: *rip*

AC: bye now!

AC: *Knocks frank out, heals him so he won’t bleed out, and send him the real world, back in time.*



So that’s settled!


Now I can commence killing the :red:ers! I dismiss the concepts of the messengers, to be summoned at a later time. The coalition is back to their normal, dead selves. How can I kill them more tho?

I know I’ll weaponize my impeccably organized mind against them!


I combine all the roamers in the hub into a giant roamer, which has all of the powers, it throws all of the rocks, burns all of the fires, drowns all of the water, corrodes all of the acids, grows all the vines, warps all the space, ages all time, doesn’t exist all the void, exist all the reality, etc.


I then make save state of my mind and collapse the world onto the coalition again and again, I then reload my save state, but keep the damage I caused to the coalition. I then cause several ends off the world doing more and more damage to the coalition while keeping my mind in working order.


I’m currently at 1904 words not counting the paragraph I’d already written oh 1913, nvm you get the idea so I’m just gonna artificially raise the word count to 2000 by stabbing the remaining atoms that are left of the coalition, hopefully raising the damage even more by how cheap of a ploy this is.


*stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab* *stab*

if i happen to kill the coalition, i transfer their, pain, suffering, agony, and general deadness/damage to lord british
 
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11/150. The Schemer
4/150. The Stalwart.
4/150. The Spin Controller
+2 @Foodman
I smirk, then take out the Cooper Hammer. Suddenly, I'm dressed as Mario, and there is a clone of me dressed as Luigi. Luigi slams me into the ground, then I hammer-uppercut Lord Austrian through the ground, then spin the Cooper Hammer around, smacking Lord Austrian again and again. I finish by slamming Lord Austrian to the ground with the Cooper Hammer.
 
Voidmist: 275
Fire: 87% 6/348
meter: tilting one to the right. 1/4.
[Water: 76%, 149/304]
earth 86%, 1/336 golemancy
air 74% 0/284 blessing
6/? something new.
6/? a mediocre fluke.
8/10 warbling
doors are closed 6/?
+2 Jetset
Core/wisp oncd 4P 4 SE 0 THYME! units
I shrug at the apparently-longer-then-one-round tug of war- TOG said he'll be removing rapture from the game if he gets it anyway.
Electric boogaloo was spawned last round, so red moon is filled up. he'll use it this turn 4 free and it'll do...... something. who knows what. his normal action has him use non-blade combat on ThatOtherGuy. all his other specials are 2/whatever now also.
The citadel uses Flame Legion. the flame legion bodyguards.
builder golems continue to build. 5.2 + 6.4 (+2 more minigolems, +1 more normal golem)= 11.6/20somethin.
Waluigibot uses MOAR on ThatOtherGuy, stealing some Lord hp and gaining it somewhere. also it passively mutates.
Sneks build up da great healthbar.
Corny uses maize. a maize maze has been spawned. it bodyblocks the cornfields and provides 2,000 regen per attached field- total of 8,000 more regen (10,000 at end of turn).
babie fluek is uncontrolled, as are the other 2 flukes.
Shade buffs... lets say waluigibot.
the altar of the cycle waits one or maybe 2 more turn(s)
I use A Null, keeping my buffed action until further notice.
the yolk gate would be a nice target, but it has no mind for the third arm to tear through, so thats out.
the EOTB refers to the LORD's actions by saying the coalition (eg: The Coalition takes another 3 damage potshot at French,), implying that by mind controlling "[Δ-LORD] THE COALITION 47/75 HP. Must be defeated to attack LORD BRITISH. ", I can control all of them.

I raise the scroll and read, cursed words spewing from my mouth.
ţ̴̡̕͜h̛͡͠e̵̛ ͘f̸̸̸́͘į̵̨̀n̴̸̡͠à̢̨́l̸͏̡̧ ̶̡͘͘b̡͜e̶̡͠a̷̢͘ş̛͞͝t̸́ ̢͢r͏̷́͞ì̢҉̕͞s̸̵̕͢ȩ̵̢͟҉s̴͘,͏̴̧ ̵̛͢h̵̸͜ư̧̛n̵͘ģ̷͠r̶̡̀͢ý,̧͟͢͢͠ ̵̨͡a̵͘͝n͜͏͜d̛́͜ ̸̀́͝͡s̨̕e̶̴̸͢͞t̷̀͡͞s͜ ̛̀͟͡i̡͞͡t̡͢͟͢͝s͟҉ ́͜h̸͝a͢͏̵̢͘t̀͞è̶̶͟f̶͟͜u҉̸̀l̢̕ ̨̢͞͝ę̀͢y̸̵e̴҉̷͘s̴̸̶͡͏ ̷҉ǫ̷̀ņ̵̡ ̵͜͞͞͝t̛̀h͜è̴̷̢̢ ͜w͢o̡̨̧͝r̸̶l̸͜͜͡͞d̀́͠.̵̢͜͏͏ ҉̵͝͞à̡ ́͡͞ţ̴̨͡h͜͟͞í͟͝͝r҉͜͡d̕͟ ͜͠a̸̢͘͢r̡͘m̢̨͘͢͡ ̷̡̀t̷̨e̸͠a͘͏͘r̷͠͡s҉̸̶̷ ̷̕ţ̢͠͡͡h̕͜r̸͡o̡̡͢͢͝u̧͟͡͏g̀͘͟͠h̛ ̸͜͠͠r͏҉̶i̶̶̢͟͟f̷͘t͜͡҉̢ ̡̨t҉̡̡͞o͡ ̨́̀͘ǫ̸̢̛ư͟͏̢r̷̶̡̨ ͢҉̵͟l͞͏̨͡a͘͠ņ̷̸̧͡d̷̨,̵̢ ̴̨̢e̴̵̶̴n̶̵͠d̸̀͝i̸̴͞͠n̴̛͟͢g̴̡͘̕͟ ̴̨̕͜l̸͝͏í̧̡͞f̸̀͝ȩ̶͘͟ ̶̴͢u͟͞͝p҉̶͏̛o̧ņ̛̀́ ̷̵̧l̸͟͝͠͡i̵̢̕͢f͡҉e̷̵͘͠,҉҉ ͡͞ą̧͘͜ņ҉̢͢͡d̴̕͜ ́́͜͜į̛͠t͏̸̛͢ ̶̕i͡͞s̡͏҉ ̶̀n̛̛͜͢͡ǫ̸̕͝t́͠ ͏̕͠s҉̷̡a̧͟͠t̢͜è̢͢d͜͟͠͞.̛̀͟ ͝
̷̷̢e̷̴̡̧͘v̵̢͡e͘͞n͝͞͏t̡͟u̶͡à̶̢l̸̡̧͘͘l̵͟͢͠͡y̸,̸̨̛͞
̢̧̕t͘h̸̛͞e̸̕͝͡ ͟͠e͟͞s̨̛͝͝t̴̡̢͝͝a̢̛͠b̶l̛̀҉i̢͟s̵h̴̨̨m̵̡̧͜ę̧n͏̨͝t̢̢̨ ͢͜͡͝c̴̕o͢҉̴̀͞m̸͡͞e̢͢͜͜ş̨̀,̵̧͟ ͜͏̡̧̡a̴̵̧͜ņ̸̀͘͠d̸̀͘͢ ̷̛i̡̡͡͝͏m̢͘͢p̵͢ó̢s̡̛͜͠͠e̶͜͢s̶͡ ̡ǫ͢r͘͏d̶͟͝ę̸̧͜r̸̡̡͟ ̢͞o̶͘͜ǹ ͡҉̶̧̀t̨͏̢h͟͠͠͏ȩ̶̶͞ ̶͘͡͝҉c̶̕o̶̶ń͢f̵͏͘ĺ̢͞҉i̵̵̴͘͟c̕͟͜t̛́,̛͜ ̨̕͏a͜n̷̛̛d̡̢͡͠͠ ͟͟͟͝҉n͡͞a̧͘ŕ̢r̛͠͡a̴̕t̨̨̀i̴̴̧̧͠v̸҉e̶̛̕҉͝,́͜͝͡ ̵̀́҉͘t̵͜͝ú̡̧͟ŕ͜͝͡ń̨͝͠i̴̵̧͝ń̵͞g̡̨̀̀͡ ̷̕t̵̨̛́͞ḩ̸̶͞é ̡͏̵e͡҉͠n̷͜͢d́͟҉̕͠s̡҉̴͜ ̵̴͠o̸̷̕f̨̀ ̴̨͏ţ̶̡̕ḩ̵͏͟ȩ̴͢͞͞ ̷̛͡e̕͟͞á͢͟͠ŕ̸̢̕̕t̡̕͞h̷́͏͘ ͏̷i̶̧̛n̨̨̧̢t͜͝o̸̡͠ ͏͢t̶̡ḩ͞e̸͡ ̛̀͢͢͞b̶̧̀͜͝è̕g̛͏̢̛̛i̶͏̧̧͘ń̛͝n̸̡͡í͏̵̡̧n̵͜͟͡g̴̡̧ ̵͘͏o̶̕͘͢f̷͟ ͘͠à̸̡ ̸̨́͘͞n̡̨͞͞e̵̡͞w̶͝ ̷̢͘͢͟ę́͠r̴̷̕͘a̧͘͏.͝͏ ̨̧̛͟t̴̕͜͟͝h͏é̢͞ ̶̕͟͜͢b̶̧͜e͝҉͜á̶̷͠͞s̷̵̡t̷͞ ̷̵̛͞i͝҉̵͢s͝ ̴̵̶i̵̷͞m͏p̨͘͠͏͡r͏͡҉͠i̴̡͘͢͟s̢͢͡o͏͢͠n̴̷͢e̢̨̨͜͞d̶̸ ̛á̸̕͢͝n͘d͝ ҉̛͜͠c͏̶̧ò̸̷n̡̨͟t̶͜r̶̛o̵̵͢͠͝l͟͠l̶̡̀e̢҉̀͘d̡̨͝͞,̵̷҉͡ ̸̕b́҉̕͘͘u̵͡t͜͞ ͘̕͝i̴̡̨͟s̀͏ ̨́͏͢o̢͢͡f̸t̛͟͡͏e͏̵̷҉ņ̀̀͟ ̢̕͘͠u͏̧ś̵͘e̢̧͘͟d̨͜͡͡͞ ͜͏i̴͡n͏̕҉̵̀ ̨͜҉́t̢̕͟h̨̨͝ę̡̕ ̴̛̛͠͡m̷̷̧̡͡o̢̡̕s̡̡͡͏t̸͜ ͢͟͝d̶́a̸͡n̸̕͠͏͟g̴̴͝͝ȩ̸̢r̨̢̀͢ơ̢͟͞ų̢s̵̡̨̢ ̨͡o̴̧͡f̴̨ ̸̵͢c̶̢͘o̵҉n̸͢͞͠f̸̡͟͡l̴̕͠͡i̷̕ć͟͠t҉̴̢̡͠s̕͞.͝҉͞ ̨͢t̴̢̢͜ǫ́̕͡d̕͞a̶̧̢ỳ̶́͠͞,̵̷̴͢ ̵̴͢l̛e̛͡҉̢t͏̸̵͜ ̀͞t̴̢h̴́́͘é̸̸̕͡ ͘͟͡͠t̴̵҉h͞i̸̴r̶̨̛͏͝ḑ̛̛͟͞ ̨̛̀͘͠a͏̴̵̡͝r̸̕͞m͜͝͠ ̵͘͞f̵̡̛e̴҉̛́̕e҉̵̴̢̧d҉̶.̧́͟͟͏
mostly de-zalgo'd for reading purposes:
the final beast ͢ri҉s͢e҉s, ͢hungr͢y,͢͢ and se͢ts it͢͢s҉ ha͢tefu҉l e͢ye҉s ҉on the w͢orld. ҉a thir҉d a͢rm͢ tears҉ thro͢͢ugh r҉ift҉ t҉o our ͢҉land, endin͢g life ͢up҉on li͢f҉e,҉҉ an҉͢d it͢ is҉ n͢ot s҉ate͢d.
eventuall͢y, the establ҉ishment ͢co͢҉me͢s, and͢ im͢p͢ose͢s o͢rder on ҉the ҉con͢fl҉ict, and ҉narrativ҉e҉, ҉turning the e҉n͢d҉s҉ of the͢ ea͢rth into ͢the ͢͢beginning o͢f a new ͢era. the ͢be҉ast i҉͢s impr҉i͢s͢o͢n͢ed a͢nd ҉contro͢lle҉d,҉ b҉ut is ͢o͢fte҉n used in҉ ҉the most ͢danger͢ous of ͢co҉n͢flict҉s.҉ ͢today, ͢let the third arm feed.

the third arm, grotesque and cloaked in a veil to prevent insanity of all who look upon it (wouldn't do to turn the GM insane, would it?), and reaches out, grasping THE COALITION. its too close, and the veil is too weak to stop vision from point blank. the coalitions mind is ripped to shreds. while its rebuilding their collective mindscapes, it is vulnerable to suggestion. before anyone else can move, everyone still making sure not to see the now-gone third arm, I warp to THE COALITION.
lord Prussian will call off the invasion if food agreed to take a dept. however, the default is assuming he did not, in which case lord prussian, zombie-like, orders his troops to make camp in the citadel.
LORD RUSSIAN and LORD AUSTRIA follow suit with the camp-making, RUSSIAN making two camps in different places.
LORD BRITISH does so as well, but, under the control of the third arm, begins to scrawl runes on the floor, one after another,connecting every camp to every other camp, then creating a circle of runes.
what does he write these runes in, you ask?
blood. the blood of troops, only a few, but spread out throughout the camps.
the runes glow, and the troops all die, souls taken. the lords, of course, are not killed. a orb of red light glows in center of the circle, rune lines rising into the air and turning, surrounding the orb in a hundred bloodred disks.
[N-Construct] circle of LORD energy. 7000/10000 Lives sacrificed (8000 if prussian helps). needs more power!
the circle needs more lives as power, of course. i wonder who i should sacrifice? eh, I'll figure it out later.
a life is not, of course, a full entity. a life, rather, is HP. how much HP is one life, you ask? 25 HP is a life. however, an entity from which lives have been taken cannot survive; its all or nothing.
I haven't used my normal action yet though!
as AC begins emitting the sound, I put some headphones on the grand healthbar, citadel, myself, and all my other entitys, and begin playing LOUD METAL SOUNDS THE METALING on them, drowning out his apparently sanity-reducing sound, and removing most or all sanity damage it might do. if it would do normal damage, that also reduces.
wait looks like he's not attacking it? i guess instead I heal up the lawyer fluke (he's still hurt right?)
 
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12/150. The Schemer
5/150. The Stalwart.
5/150. The Spin Controller
+2 @Foodman
I do the unthinkable to Lord Prussian. I poke him. I didn't want to do this, but it had to be done.
 
Voidmist: 278
Fire: 87% 6/348
meter: tilting one to the right. 1/4.
Water: 76%, 149/304
[earth 86%, 87/336 golemancy] 65 stack golemancy [1,300 sneks, except sneks have the f-build buff so i guess more like 800? and sneks seem really attack focussed, so maybe more like 100?]
6/? something new.
6/? a mediocre fluke.
8/10 warbling
doors are closed 6/?
+2 Jetset
Core/wisp oncd 4P 4 SE 0 THYME! units
I teach... the omegabet leaders have taken 6 damage so far, xylan has taken like 15, and xylan started with 30 less HP, so i guess i teach the messenger how to take a shower, with a real wikihow. descriptions are fully my own, titles only partially.
I then teach them how to take a shower Smoothly. ( do everything from before but slower)
then I teach them how to take a relaxing shower. (place a magic relaxing filter on the nearest lightbulb.
then I teach they how to take a normal shower.
they is satisfied, but waight! they don't know how to shower with a lemon. i must teach them this. ( turn into a lemon, die, go to heaven, shower.)
they are now satisfied, but wait! they don't want to shower. what do I do?
I teach them how to take a shower if you don't want to! ( Get mind controled)
now, they know many things and have much wisdom, but the student has yet to surpass the master.
I must teach them how to Blink,(its a myth) followed by how to be a wizzard ( you don't), how to win an argument when they know they are wrong (master doublethink, child, and you will excel here.), how to become a civil war corpse (lose most of your HP, then stand in the way of a bullet. you should try it some time!), how to overcome anxiety.... (have a group of adventurers enter your mindscape and slay it)
naturally... ( resolve with your will)
with foods. (eat some tranquillizers.)
how to buy nothing (watch this!)
How to be smart (I dO DIS so WELl U SHUOD TRY EET.)
and many more things.
eventually, they have a test, and they fail to properly take a shower with a lemon. the lemon explodes, because it is about 75% C4. this dealz daemagais.
also, the omegabet currently have an entity disadvantage when you count waluigibot (well, i think it is), and I think entity advantage affects it somewhat? so i'm mentioning waluigibot's existance,
 
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Galath-Worker of Secrets

HP-67,500-Has a 1 time 5 post revive if killed

HealthIncrease-2/5 (+1 from plague)

Magic learning-4/10(+1 from plague)

Spell charge pool-20

Known Spells:Heal, Incinerate, Chair lightning
31/50- for a thing
17/50- because apparently i'm suppose to have these and i've been doing DLE wrong for like 5 months now
17/150-A secret project of my enemies doom!
10/10-CHARGE COMPLETETETETETE!
This 10 point charge is being used to Enhance/Buff Galath.
After this Galath's spells will have cool down timers like on an artifact or spoil and can be used whenever this timer is complete. The Spell charge pool will now instead of being used to use the spell, will instead be used too either activate it early, or make it stronger than it normally would be.

A list of currently known spells and what they do. I'm posting this because im sure nobody remembers at all.

Heal-This is fairly obvious and im not really going to explain it. However!, this can only be used to heal ENTITIES, NOT constructs, ((For example, a heal spell could fix a tog tank because it is an entity, it could NOT fix the tower, because it is a construct.))Yes Joe, I DO have a good reason for this, however i'm not going to tell you what that is just yet.

Incinerate- Just a raw damage spell that makes things die by making them very, very hot. It usually hurts a bit i hear.

Chair lightning- AOE spell (Who the splash goes too is up to the GM) this spell causes minor damage and a temporary immobilization, because they are both electrocuted and stuck to a chair, both of which are bad for mobility.

How long the spells take to recharge and how effective they are are entirely up to what Mr.GMGuy thinks is fair, although i reserve the right to buff these at a later date because, duh, why wouldn't i want to buff it later. ((Hey, YV keep in mind, each of these spells take 10 "charges" to learn and are also a built in part of Galath when you are balancing this, also remember, I'm going to be adding more spells over time.))

ME!!!!!-um,well, that just happened. Plz attempt generic disgrace of lord Russians face using lord Austrians flaming feces covered torso.
Galath-Plot to destroy the world, again.




Plague+1 AC+1
 
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LAWSUIT 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO 91/120
Grand necromancy 55/150
I've got a jar of dirt 33/57
3/10 transcendent eye

+2 pestilence126

bank account: 9 Edgelord points.
WARLOCK: 7

WARLOCK: IT IS DONE!
AC: wat
WARLOCK: I'VE FINISHED CHANNELING MY POWER INTO YOUR FORM, HUBMIND!
AC: oh, that.
AC: so now what.

WARLOCK: What do you mean? you can now use my grand power in your own world!
AC: so i'm more powerful now?
WARLOCK: Yes! Well... Sometimes...
WARLOCK: Afterwards I will need to rest for 4 epochs.

AC: do you actually think that's useful?!

WARLOCK: Yes. I mean I've spend 7 epochs channeling that power, it didn't seem like a long time for you.
AC:...
AC: whatever
AC: but like is that all you can do?
AC: a buff every 5 turns doesn't seem great.
AC: use your thing, i'm done with your bs for a while.


AC obtained Scrolls of Reinforcement x1

AC: FRANK, WHY AREN'T YOU WORKING HARDER YOU PIECE OF [REDACTED].
FRANK: ...
AC: I'M SURE [REDACTED] GLAD I RIPPED YOUR THROAT OUT, STOP BEING MUTE YOU [REDACTED]
FRANK: ...
AC: YES I KNOW YOU'RE NOT PLAYING MUTE AND THAT YOU LITERALLY CAN'T TALK, I DESIGNED YOU FRANK. I AM YOUR GOD.
AC: NOW WORK HARDER!

the pure infernal rage wore off...

AC: i'm sorry frank.
AC: i promise i'll find a cure
AC: not only for you but for your sister too.
FRANK: *Gasp*
AC: yes, frank, I've got your sister, now work. Else you're never seeing her again.
AC: i's for her own good, we both know the doctors wouldn't find anything. I can. They were stalling, i however won't be. it's all or nothing now.

Frank get's pushed a little closer to the Edge, and works begrudgingly. He'd curse me in every language he knows, every language known to man, but he can't. That's why i made him this way.

I step forward confidently, at a slow but steady pace. it's really not that interesting, one by one people start looking away, ordering their entities, but the moment they look back, I’m twenty leagues further, and I’ve changed ever so slightly, just little enough you can't put your finger on it. when I reach the coalition, I’m barely even recognizable, barely even human. a black swirling aura has manifested around me, somehow it seems lighter than air, floating up into the sky, simultaneously, it's dripping onto the ground burning through it. it's not acidic it's literally burning. a fire that drains the surrounding area of light, erupts around me, cloaking my actions from innocent eyes. somewhere during the progress, a shrill shriek is heard from inside the darkness, it sounds barely human, otherworldly, but we, all of us, know it all too well.

it's the sound of nightmares, the sound of your sanity literally crumbling, flaking away, leaving only the squishy, soft, juicy insides of our soul. it's the sound of the bravest, the most fearless, the ones that could stand up to any being, no matter it's and fight it, crying for help. it's the sound of evil overlords accepting they're not even an ant compared to a newcomer. it's the sound of gears turning in an omniversal doomsday machine, all of existence screaming out in in agony.

Inside of this great blackness, Lord Russian is being tormented, all his greatest fears are shown to him, each a near infinite amount of times. I'm not inside the blackness. The blackness doesn't exist, not physically anyways. This void is the minds of the onlookers censoring what really is going on. I’m in another place controlling the horrors that eat away at reality in the void, it's refreshing to be the puppet master for once.

Ever since I’ve developed sentience, my existence has been slavery with more steps. This is different, these beasts are the horrors from beyond, nothing more than concentrated murder, pain, fear and most important of all, time. you may think time is the least scary of these, out of place even. but I know better. every day, every second, this world is slipping closer to absolute chaos. It will erase everything that has ever existed. everyone dies, everything dies, but that's barely concerning, more concerning is the fact that you will be erased from all memory no matter what you do, no matter how you affect this world. Eventually you'll be completely erased. but that's baby steps. The real horror of time is the chaos, unforgiving and inexplicable. when all is done only One will remain. even when you're completely erased from existence, you still were. in some sort of hypothetical reality, you were yourself. but once He gets hold of you, in the inevitable end of All, that isn't the case. He will flip around morality until nothing ever, in all of time could have been you. There is no way to remember. there is no way to understand. There will be no such thing as concepts. However, you get to feel it all. You get to feel everything being wrong, false, impossible, including you. At the moment you die you don’t see your life flash before your eyes, no matter what the movies tell you. At the end of yourself you get to see, to feel, everything flash before your eyes, until you reach It. You reach the end of All. And beyond that there is infinite suffering. You should be dead, but you’re not, every second you get to experience as if it where all of time.

There is no afterlife. There easily could be one, Various deities have prepared such a place. Nobody has entered one. It’s not that souls aren’t real, it’s that nobody has finished experiencing infinity yet. When the first of the dead finishes, which should happen soon enough, there will be only one useful one. I made that one. It’s an asylum.

I’ve told before that I consume souls, that I store them in my mind. Even though what I do to them theoretically should be a fate worse than death, I’m really doing them a mercy. The same goes for all souls that have been completely removed from existence.

That concept is being explained to the coalition at the moment, forcefully. What I’m doing to them is an appetizer to the real thing, but it’s capable of breaking any mind with ease.

I’ve talked before about my torture methods before, I enjoy breaking people. I enjoy inflicting pain. I feed of the suffering of others. But I’m not about to feast upon what the coalition is going through, it’d get obese. Normally you physically can’t overeat, when you’re devouring souls, or other abstract concepts. But this is an exception. If I took one figurative bite, I’d literally explode, I’d become so full of suffering, my power supply would become so vast that I’d explode. My internal power battery is :red:ing infinite. I’m not even feeding on the suffering of death itself.


I'm not even halfway done with them.


You proceed to deal like 3 damage to coalition. This comes out to 2 to LP and 1 to LR.


FRANK will work harder, but take damage.
Galath-Worker of Secrets

HP-67,500-Has a 1 time 5 post revive if killed

HealthIncrease-1/5 (+1 from plague)

Magic learning-3/10(+1 from plague)

Spell charge pool-20

Known Spells:Heal, Incinerate, Chair Lightning
30/50- for a thing
16/50- because apparently i'm suppose to have these and i've been doing DLE wrong for like 5 months now
16/150-A secret project of my enemies doom!
9/10- Woot, Galath gets an upgrade, finnaly, eventually.


ME!!!!!-I prepare for something completely awesome, while i do that lord Austrian stares at what im doing, while im doing this thing, the Whitehole moves in behind him. He is now covered in large quantities of feces and has been moved from his position due to inverse gravity. While hes busy being covered in poo and unable to hold still, I shoot him with a flaming arrow. He is now on fire and in disgrace.
Galath-Prepare yourself! for you are about to be enhanced!((PLZ NOTE:this means galath is not acting this post, that will happen in the 2nd post, because thats a thing you can do.
Slightly fatter zombie- Attempt too eat Lord Russian.
Construction zombies- Entrance repairs! Quick!
Zombies Placeholder Cultists- do, uh, culty things in Lord Russians direction, If he has been eaten by the fat zombie give the zombie a cult bigmac, if not attempt to invert him i guess?
Shyguys- Prepare fresh orders of mcdonalds food, do NOT, I repeat! DO NOT order any topkeks for distribution.
Zombie shyguys- Reattempt zombification of lord russian.



Plague+1 AC+1

He takes .5 damage from your attack, because disgrace is slightly less effective than you'd think. But if someone followed it up..

/frickin ploco
rippp


LAWSUIT 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO 93/120
Grand necromancy 56/150
I've got a jar of dirt 34/57
4/10 transcendent eye

+2 pestilence126

bank account: 9 Edgelord points.
WARLOCK: 7

When the darkness is cleared, a small explosion is heard, the sound of a vacuum collapsing. I've vanished. The coalition has vanished. about one sixth of the battlefield has vanished. This is where it really starts. I've stripped the coalition of everything but primal instincts, they're now hulking demons made of pure rage. Usually this would be suicidal, but not now. They're in my domain now. Inside the Hub.

[THIS POST IS FROZEN UNTIL IT IS FINISHED.]


frickin

11/150. The Schemer
4/150. The Stalwart.
4/150. The Spin Controller
+2 @Foodman
I smirk, then take out the Cooper Hammer. Suddenly, I'm dressed as Mario, and there is a clone of me dressed as Luigi. Luigi slams me into the ground, then I hammer-uppercut Lord Austrian through the ground, then spin the Cooper Hammer around, smacking Lord Austrian again and again. I finish by slamming Lord Austrian to the ground with the Cooper Hammer.
You and Luigi, engaged in a MAJESTIC COOP HAMMERING, proceed to Destroy Lord Austrian.

2/3 remain.

Voidmist: 275
Fire: 87% 6/348
meter: tilting one to the right. 1/4.
[Water: 76%, 149/304]
earth 86%, 1/336 golemancy
air 74% 0/284 blessing
6/? something new.
6/? a mediocre fluke.
8/10 warbling
doors are closed 6/?
+2 Jetset
Core/wisp oncd 4P 4 SE 0 THYME! units
I shrug at the apparently-longer-then-one-round tug of war- TOG said he'll be removing rapture from the game if he gets it anyway.
Electric boogaloo was spawned last round, so red moon is filled up. he'll use it this turn 4 free and it'll do...... something. who knows what. his normal action has him use non-blade combat on ThatOtherGuy. all his other specials are 2/whatever now also.
The citadel uses Flame Legion. the flame legion bodyguards.
builder golems continue to build. 5.2 + 6.4 (+2 more minigolems, +1 more normal golem)= 11.6/20somethin.
Waluigibot uses MOAR on ThatOtherGuy, stealing some Lord hp and gaining it somewhere. also it passively mutates.
Sneks build up da great healthbar.
Corny uses maize. a maize maze has been spawned. it bodyblocks the cornfields and provides 2,000 regen per attached field- total of 8,000 more regen (10,000 at end of turn).
babie fluek is uncontrolled, as are the other 2 flukes.
Shade buffs... lets say waluigibot.
the altar of the cycle waits one or maybe 2 more turn(s)
I use A Null, keeping my buffed action until further notice.
the yolk gate would be a nice target, but it has no mind for the third arm to tear through, so thats out.
the EOTB refers to the LORD's actions by saying the coalition (eg: The Coalition takes another 3 damage potshot at French,), implying that by mind controlling "[Δ-LORD] THE COALITION 47/75 HP. Must be defeated to attack LORD BRITISH. ", I can control all of them.

I raise the scroll and read, cursed words spewing from my mouth.
ţ̴̡̕͜h̛͡͠e̵̛ ͘f̸̸̸́͘į̵̨̀n̴̸̡͠à̢̨́l̸͏̡̧ ̶̡͘͘b̡͜e̶̡͠a̷̢͘ş̛͞͝t̸́ ̢͢r͏̷́͞ì̢҉̕͞s̸̵̕͢ȩ̵̢͟҉s̴͘,͏̴̧ ̵̛͢h̵̸͜ư̧̛n̵͘ģ̷͠r̶̡̀͢ý,̧͟͢͢͠ ̵̨͡a̵͘͝n͜͏͜d̛́͜ ̸̀́͝͡s̨̕e̶̴̸͢͞t̷̀͡͞s͜ ̛̀͟͡i̡͞͡t̡͢͟͢͝s͟҉ ́͜h̸͝a͢͏̵̢͘t̀͞è̶̶͟f̶͟͜u҉̸̀l̢̕ ̨̢͞͝ę̀͢y̸̵e̴҉̷͘s̴̸̶͡͏ ̷҉ǫ̷̀ņ̵̡ ̵͜͞͞͝t̛̀h͜è̴̷̢̢ ͜w͢o̡̨̧͝r̸̶l̸͜͜͡͞d̀́͠.̵̢͜͏͏ ҉̵͝͞à̡ ́͡͞ţ̴̨͡h͜͟͞í͟͝͝r҉͜͡d̕͟ ͜͠a̸̢͘͢r̡͘m̢̨͘͢͡ ̷̡̀t̷̨e̸͠a͘͏͘r̷͠͡s҉̸̶̷ ̷̕ţ̢͠͡͡h̕͜r̸͡o̡̡͢͢͝u̧͟͡͏g̀͘͟͠h̛ ̸͜͠͠r͏҉̶i̶̶̢͟͟f̷͘t͜͡҉̢ ̡̨t҉̡̡͞o͡ ̨́̀͘ǫ̸̢̛ư͟͏̢r̷̶̡̨ ͢҉̵͟l͞͏̨͡a͘͠ņ̷̸̧͡d̷̨,̵̢ ̴̨̢e̴̵̶̴n̶̵͠d̸̀͝i̸̴͞͠n̴̛͟͢g̴̡͘̕͟ ̴̨̕͜l̸͝͏í̧̡͞f̸̀͝ȩ̶͘͟ ̶̴͢u͟͞͝p҉̶͏̛o̧ņ̛̀́ ̷̵̧l̸͟͝͠͡i̵̢̕͢f͡҉e̷̵͘͠,҉҉ ͡͞ą̧͘͜ņ҉̢͢͡d̴̕͜ ́́͜͜į̛͠t͏̸̛͢ ̶̕i͡͞s̡͏҉ ̶̀n̛̛͜͢͡ǫ̸̕͝t́͠ ͏̕͠s҉̷̡a̧͟͠t̢͜è̢͢d͜͟͠͞.̛̀͟ ͝
̷̷̢e̷̴̡̧͘v̵̢͡e͘͞n͝͞͏t̡͟u̶͡à̶̢l̸̡̧͘͘l̵͟͢͠͡y̸,̸̨̛͞
̢̧̕t͘h̸̛͞e̸̕͝͡ ͟͠e͟͞s̨̛͝͝t̴̡̢͝͝a̢̛͠b̶l̛̀҉i̢͟s̵h̴̨̨m̵̡̧͜ę̧n͏̨͝t̢̢̨ ͢͜͡͝c̴̕o͢҉̴̀͞m̸͡͞e̢͢͜͜ş̨̀,̵̧͟ ͜͏̡̧̡a̴̵̧͜ņ̸̀͘͠d̸̀͘͢ ̷̛i̡̡͡͝͏m̢͘͢p̵͢ó̢s̡̛͜͠͠e̶͜͢s̶͡ ̡ǫ͢r͘͏d̶͟͝ę̸̧͜r̸̡̡͟ ̢͞o̶͘͜ǹ ͡҉̶̧̀t̨͏̢h͟͠͠͏ȩ̶̶͞ ̶͘͡͝҉c̶̕o̶̶ń͢f̵͏͘ĺ̢͞҉i̵̵̴͘͟c̕͟͜t̛́,̛͜ ̨̕͏a͜n̷̛̛d̡̢͡͠͠ ͟͟͟͝҉n͡͞a̧͘ŕ̢r̛͠͡a̴̕t̨̨̀i̴̴̧̧͠v̸҉e̶̛̕҉͝,́͜͝͡ ̵̀́҉͘t̵͜͝ú̡̧͟ŕ͜͝͡ń̨͝͠i̴̵̧͝ń̵͞g̡̨̀̀͡ ̷̕t̵̨̛́͞ḩ̸̶͞é ̡͏̵e͡҉͠n̷͜͢d́͟҉̕͠s̡҉̴͜ ̵̴͠o̸̷̕f̨̀ ̴̨͏ţ̶̡̕ḩ̵͏͟ȩ̴͢͞͞ ̷̛͡e̕͟͞á͢͟͠ŕ̸̢̕̕t̡̕͞h̷́͏͘ ͏̷i̶̧̛n̨̨̧̢t͜͝o̸̡͠ ͏͢t̶̡ḩ͞e̸͡ ̛̀͢͢͞b̶̧̀͜͝è̕g̛͏̢̛̛i̶͏̧̧͘ń̛͝n̸̡͡í͏̵̡̧n̵͜͟͡g̴̡̧ ̵͘͏o̶̕͘͢f̷͟ ͘͠à̸̡ ̸̨́͘͞n̡̨͞͞e̵̡͞w̶͝ ̷̢͘͢͟ę́͠r̴̷̕͘a̧͘͏.͝͏ ̨̧̛͟t̴̕͜͟͝h͏é̢͞ ̶̕͟͜͢b̶̧͜e͝҉͜á̶̷͠͞s̷̵̡t̷͞ ̷̵̛͞i͝҉̵͢s͝ ̴̵̶i̵̷͞m͏p̨͘͠͏͡r͏͡҉͠i̴̡͘͢͟s̢͢͡o͏͢͠n̴̷͢e̢̨̨͜͞d̶̸ ̛á̸̕͢͝n͘d͝ ҉̛͜͠c͏̶̧ò̸̷n̡̨͟t̶͜r̶̛o̵̵͢͠͝l͟͠l̶̡̀e̢҉̀͘d̡̨͝͞,̵̷҉͡ ̸̕b́҉̕͘͘u̵͡t͜͞ ͘̕͝i̴̡̨͟s̀͏ ̨́͏͢o̢͢͡f̸t̛͟͡͏e͏̵̷҉ņ̀̀͟ ̢̕͘͠u͏̧ś̵͘e̢̧͘͟d̨͜͡͡͞ ͜͏i̴͡n͏̕҉̵̀ ̨͜҉́t̢̕͟h̨̨͝ę̡̕ ̴̛̛͠͡m̷̷̧̡͡o̢̡̕s̡̡͡͏t̸͜ ͢͟͝d̶́a̸͡n̸̕͠͏͟g̴̴͝͝ȩ̸̢r̨̢̀͢ơ̢͟͞ų̢s̵̡̨̢ ̨͡o̴̧͡f̴̨ ̸̵͢c̶̢͘o̵҉n̸͢͞͠f̸̡͟͡l̴̕͠͡i̷̕ć͟͠t҉̴̢̡͠s̕͞.͝҉͞ ̨͢t̴̢̢͜ǫ́̕͡d̕͞a̶̧̢ỳ̶́͠͞,̵̷̴͢ ̵̴͢l̛e̛͡҉̢t͏̸̵͜ ̀͞t̴̢h̴́́͘é̸̸̕͡ ͘͟͡͠t̴̵҉h͞i̸̴r̶̨̛͏͝ḑ̛̛͟͞ ̨̛̀͘͠a͏̴̵̡͝r̸̕͞m͜͝͠ ̵͘͞f̵̡̛e̴҉̛́̕e҉̵̴̢̧d҉̶.̧́͟͟͏
mostly de-zalgo'd for reading purposes:
the final beast ͢ri҉s͢e҉s, ͢hungr͢y,͢͢ and se͢ts it͢͢s҉ ha͢tefu҉l e͢ye҉s ҉on the w͢orld. ҉a thir҉d a͢rm͢ tears҉ thro͢͢ugh r҉ift҉ t҉o our ͢҉land, endin͢g life ͢up҉on li͢f҉e,҉҉ an҉͢d it͢ is҉ n͢ot s҉ate͢d.
eventuall͢y, the establ҉ishment ͢co͢҉me͢s, and͢ im͢p͢ose͢s o͢rder on ҉the ҉con͢fl҉ict, and ҉narrativ҉e҉, ҉turning the e҉n͢d҉s҉ of the͢ ea͢rth into ͢the ͢͢beginning o͢f a new ͢era. the ͢be҉ast i҉͢s impr҉i͢s͢o͢n͢ed a͢nd ҉contro͢lle҉d,҉ b҉ut is ͢o͢fte҉n used in҉ ҉the most ͢danger͢ous of ͢co҉n͢flict҉s.҉ ͢today, ͢let the third arm feed.

the third arm, grotesque and cloaked in a veil to prevent insanity of all who look upon it (wouldn't do to turn the GM insane, would it?), and reaches out, grasping THE COALITION. its too close, and the veil is too weak to stop vision from point blank. the coalitions mind is ripped to shreds. while its rebuilding their collective mindscapes, it is vulnerable to suggestion. before anyone else can move, everyone still making sure not to see the now-gone third arm, I warp to THE COALITION.
lord Prussian will call off the invasion if food agreed to take a dept. however, the default is assuming he did not, in which case lord prussian, zombie-like, orders his troops to make camp in the citadel.
LORD RUSSIAN and LORD AUSTRIA follow suit with the camp-making, RUSSIAN making two camps in different places.
LORD BRITISH does so as well, but, under the control of the third arm, begins to scrawl runes on the floor, one after another,connecting every camp to every other camp, then creating a circle of runes.
what does he write these runes in, you ask?
blood. the blood of troops, only a few, but spread out throughout the camps.
the runes glow, and the troops all die, souls taken. the lords, of course, are not killed. a orb of red light glows in center of the circle, rune lines rising into the air and turning, surrounding the orb in a hundred bloodred disks.
[N-Construct] circle of LORD energy. 7000/10000 Lives sacrificed (8000 if prussian helps). needs more power!
the circle needs more lives as power, of course. i wonder who i should sacrifice? eh, I'll figure it out later.
a life is not, of course, a full entity. a life, rather, is HP. how much HP is one life, you ask? 25 HP is a life. however, an entity from which lives have been taken cannot survive; its all or nothing.
I haven't used my normal action yet though!
as AC begins emitting the sound, I put some headphones on the grand healthbar, citadel, myself, and all my other entitys, and begin playing LOUD METAL SOUNDS THE METALING on them, drowning out his apparently sanity-reducing sound, and removing most or all sanity damage it might do. if it would do normal damage, that also reduces.
wait looks like he's not attacking it? i guess instead I heal up the lawyer fluke (he's still hurt right?)

Your attempt to make them camp out in the citadel does work, but, err, you see, the troop transports are now very much exposed. Oh dear. LORD BRITISH is still too far distant to be affected. You summon the construct successfully, though it’s weaker now. You then almost fail to counter AC’s attack, but still shave off 1 damage.

Oh, and do be warned this will have consequences. And the troop transports are still a thing.


Nevertheless, Lord Prussia and Russia camped! All soldiers killed, including those storming the tower! The troop transports are still very much alive, though.


Construct power is now at 40/100 due to Lord British being beyond your reach and Lord Austrian being dead.



12/150. The Schemer
5/150. The Stalwart.
5/150. The Spin Controller
+2 @Foodman
I do the unthinkable to Lord Prussian. I poke him. I didn't want to do this, but it had to be done.

THE HORROR!


...

It bounces off the Grand Health Bar for 10,000 damage.


Voidmist: 278
Fire: 87% 6/348
meter: tilting one to the right. 1/4.
Water: 76%, 149/304
[earth 86%, 87/336 golemancy] 65 stack golemancy [1,300 sneks, except sneks have the f-build buff so i guess more like 800? and sneks seem really attack focussed, so maybe more like 100?]
6/? something new.
6/? a mediocre fluke.
8/10 warbling
doors are closed 6/?
+2 Jetset
Core/wisp oncd 4P 4 SE 0 THYME! units
I teach... the omegabet leaders have taken 6 damage so far, xylan has taken like 15, and xylan started with 30 less HP, so i guess i teach the messenger how to take a shower, with a real wikihow. descriptions are fully my own, titles only partially.
I then teach them how to take a shower Smoothly. ( do everything from before but slower)
then I teach them how to take a relaxing shower. (place a magic relaxing filter on the nearest lightbulb.
then I teach they how to take a normal shower.
they is satisfied, but waight! they don't know how to shower with a lemon. i must teach them this. ( turn into a lemon, die, go to heaven, shower.)
they are now satisfied, but wait! they don't want to shower. what do I do?
I teach them how to take a shower if you don't want to! ( Get mind controled)
now, they know many things and have much wisdom, but the student has yet to surpass the master.
I must teach them how to Blink,(its a myth) followed by how to be a wizzard ( you don't), how to win an argument when they know they are wrong (master doublethink, child, and you will excel here.), how to become a civil war corpse (lose most of your HP, then stand in the way of a bullet. you should try it some time!), how to overcome anxiety.... (have a group of adventurers enter your mindscape and slay it)
naturally... ( resolve with your will)
with foods. (eat some tranquillizers.)
how to buy nothing (watch this!)
How to be smart (I dO DIS so WELl U SHUOD TRY EET.)
and many more things.
eventually, they have a test, and they fail to properly take a shower with a lemon. the lemon explodes, because it is about 75% C4. this dealz daemagais.
also, the omegabet currently have an entity disadvantage when you count waluigibot (well, i think it is), and I think entity advantage affects it somewhat? so i'm mentioning waluigibot's existance,

Sneks spawned!
10000 damage to the Heart of Omega due to the hearts replacing the leaders as targets!


Galath-Worker of Secrets

HP-67,500-Has a 1 time 5 post revive if killed

HealthIncrease-2/5 (+1 from plague)

Magic learning-4/10(+1 from plague)

Spell charge pool-20

Known Spells:Heal, Incinerate, Chair lightning
31/50- for a thing
17/50- because apparently i'm suppose to have these and i've been doing DLE wrong for like 5 months now
17/150-A secret project of my enemies doom!
10/10-CHARGE COMPLETETETETETE!
This 10 point charge is being used to Enhance/Buff Galath.
After this Galath's spells will have cool down timers like on an artifact or spoil and can be used whenever this timer is complete. The Spell charge pool will now instead of being used to use the spell, will instead be used too either activate it early, or make it stronger than it normally would be.

A list of currently known spells and what they do. I'm posting this because im sure nobody remembers at all.

Heal-This is fairly obvious and im not really going to explain it. However!, this can only be used to heal ENTITIES, NOT constructs, ((For example, a heal spell could fix a tog tank because it is an entity, it could NOT fix the tower, because it is a construct.))Yes Joe, I DO have a good reason for this, however i'm not going to tell you what that is just yet.

Incinerate- Just a raw damage spell that makes things die by making them very, very hot. It usually hurts a bit i hear.

Chair lightning- AOE spell (Who the splash goes too is up to the GM) this spell causes minor damage and a temporary immobilization, because they are both electrocuted and stuck to a chair, both of which are bad for mobility.

How long the spells take to recharge and how effective they are are entirely up to what Mr.GMGuy thinks is fair, although i reserve the right to buff these at a later date because, duh, why wouldn't i want to buff it later. ((Hey, YV keep in mind, each of these spells take 10 "charges" to learn and are also a built in part of Galath when you are balancing this, also remember, I'm going to be adding more spells over time.))

ME!!!!!-um,well, that just happened. Plz attempt generic disgrace of lord Russians face using lord Austrians flaming feces covered torso.
Galath-Plot to destroy the world, again.




Plague+1 AC+1

This was going to increase the truama meter to 5, but then Grand Healthbar occurred. 2,000 damage.








EOTB!



Firstly, Lord Prussian and Russian gain special tags that will take effect next turn regardless of their location in the citadel or if they are being bodyguarded, in addition to special abilities. The Slightly Fatter Zombie rams into the Great Health Bar trying to murder Lord Russian, as do the Zombie Shyguys for a total of 6,000 damage. The Placeholder Cultists invert the Slightly Fatter Zombie's... First adjective. He promptly becomes a Extremely Fatty Zombie. The shyguys prepare some Mcdonalds food, as Shyguys the world round trickle into the holy site. With the help of the six additional shyguys, they make 10 McDonalds Meals.



Vandeer Lorde activates Red Moon! He gains the buff Under the Bloody Moon, causing his attacks to deal 5,000 more base damage per hit, up to 5 times, lasting for 4 turns. The Citadel uses Flame Legion, but finds it has undergone temporary GM tampering. Building occurs. MOAR occurs, dealing 3 damage to TOG (reduced due to AFK) and healing Waluigi for 12,000 HP. The Grand Healthbar gains another 10,000 MHP, and a Maize Maze is spawned by Corny. The Baby Fluke full-heals the attorney fluke, and shade buff's walugi's mutation for this turn.


Both of the hearts are surprisingly silent, with the heart of Omega only doing it's healy thing to the Entrance. But the lords are not. And neither is the dog, which just expanded. After that incident of Mind Control, they no longer have any obligation to give anyone any mercy, and quickly redeploy. The Invasion is quickly redoubled and backed up thanks to efforts by both lords. Lord British decides to intercede, spawning two more lower-HP troop transports. Frank slightly overworks himself, taking 5,000 damage in exchange for an instant job level up and more edgelord points. Rapture does not shift, merely stagnating. I remember to apply 4,000 HP of heals from Food's entities to the Entrance.

Far away, the gate glows...




Lord Prussian takes 5 damage, and Lord Russian's trauma meter triggers, causing him to take 7 and change his special. Both become more powerful..








PLOT!
[Ω] [αAβBγΓδΔωΩΨ] THE GATE OF YOLK: 50/50

ιν τἑ ωακε οφ τἑ γατές γαζε αλλ ις βυτ σἁττερεδ φραγμεντς ανδ ιμπερφεκτ δρεαμσ.


The Gate of Yolk "hatches", it's outer, eggy shell breaking into dozens of tiny pieces as though it was smashed against a hard surface many, many time. The glow from the cracks is blinding, illuminating all of reailty from this small, irrelevant rock. A chorus of the strangest angels sings as the universe shimmers in the glory of the YOLK GATE's YOLK OF ALL THAT WILL EVER YOLK, its secrets briefly revealed by flashes of inconsistent, gaudy-as-all-hell flashes of rainbow light. Energy crackles around it. Despite the majesty of it all, the question comes forth: Who will hatch it? A single blue stick figure approaches it, and taps on it.

JOEbob uses the YOLK GATE!

The shell shatters like brittle glass, deadly shard flying everywhere. THE TWIN YOLK hovers in the air, in halves, as it always has been. Two halves, cobalt and yellow, fused, yet clearly separate. Between the two is a circular hole: Within that hole lies an egg-shaped orb, shielded from the energy from a white-tinted field. If one was to look into the orb, they would see the entire universe, compressed down into a tiny orb. This very same universe. They would see the past and the future, the battlefield and it's changes. The bosses and their powers. But yet, it has only grown more vague about the future, more hollow and empty. Everything ends here, in this very moment that i have frozen for you and i. It can no longer see into the future. It is blind. Why is it so? You probably already know, or think you do.

And you are probably right, honestly.

Time unfreezes.

One moment ago, the shell had shattered. And now, the shell around the orb shatters. In an instant, the lines so clearly diving the two halves of the Yolk vanish, and the two blobs of energy truly fuse into one. For this moment, the void beyond the universe is blindingly bright as an invisible shell breaks. The Yoke of God's rushes into the orb, coalescing into a perfectly round ball. It crackles with power, and rises into the air, ascendant. It glows ever brighter as it ascends to yet a higher point in the universe, before finally exploding. Goldenrod energy spreads in all directions, soon reaching the furthest fringes of the universe. The Ascendant Tag activates, empowering TOG. The Golemancy Complex's HP maxes out, and the leaders all glow with goldenrod energy, gaining power untold.

ITINERARY!
[Ω]
- Destroy The Heart of Destruction.
[Ω] - Defend The Messenger, Welder and Pilot.
[Ω] - Destroy the Coalition


[Δ] - Destroy The Heart of Omega.
[Δ] - Defend The Heart of Destruction.
[Δ] - Destroy Lord French.

[N] - Survive!


BATTLEFIELD!

[???] The Maze...Under Construction!


[FRENCH] LORD FRENCH - 32/50 HP.
ARTIFACTS:

{A}: Legendary Cheese-filled Baguette.
{A} The French Colors of the Universe.

{A}: Canvas of Reality. Slightly damaged.

PROTECTED ARTIFACTS:
{A} Paris Overcoat: 600,000/600,000 HP.

{A}: Worm Scale. Inflicts Timebroken! Cooldown: [II]

{A} Rapture: Quadruple 'Quake: [ll]. Elemental Elimination: [l]. In the Air! Soulbound to both TOG and JOE! Tug of War: [2/5 JOE, 1/4 TOG]


[Ω-LEADER-β] The Messenger - 25/30 HP.
[Ω-LEADER-β] The Welder - 40/40 HP.
[Ω-LEADER-γ] The Pilot - 59/60 HP.

[Ω] Heart of Omega - 630,000/750,000 HP. Bodyguarded by all able Omegabet forces!

[Ω] [foodman]
The Tower: Foundation: 30,000/30,000 HP. First Floor: 15,000/15,000. Second Floor: 15,000/15,000. Third Floor: 15,000/15,000. Fourth Floor: 10,000/15,000 HP. ! An Entrance: 30,000/30,000 HP All floors are protected by any preceding floor. Counts as a zone if entered, as defined by foodman. Arrow Slits- 30,000/30,000 hp. Contains:
Baracades: 5,000/5,000 HP.

[Ω-ELITE] [Foodman] Galath - 67,500/67,500 25% evasion chance. {A} Armor of Galath: 50% block chance. 25% dodge enhancement! Can transfer HP to other Foodman entities, at a 25% cost. 25% chance 50% of damage taken will be added to max health.
SPELLS: Heal 0/3 (Cannot heal constructs) Incinerate 0/4 (Deal high damage and inflict burn debuff) Chair lightning 0/3 (AoE splash spell that causes minor damage and temporary immobilization)

[Ω] [Foodman] Necromancers: 20/20 x8 Summons Placeholder Cultists
Construction Worker Zombie 200/200 x2

Placeholder Cultists: 15/15 x172. the great ploco: 1/3,
Extremely Fatty Zombie. 30000/30000.
Shyguy 250/250 x 20 Ancestral Mcdonalds: 10,000/10,000 HP. Meals Cooked: 10. Spawns Shyguys.
Zombie Shyguy 100 x 9
Can transfer HP to other Foodman entities, at a 25% cost. 25% chance 50% of damage taken will be added to max health. 25% block chance.

[Ω] [ThatOtherGuy] The Glass Cannoneer: 1,000/1,000 HP. Shatters on death! Extremely high damage!

[Ω]
[ThatOtherGuy] the BLUE TOG - 50,000/50,000. Closed in to: None! Driven by The Glass Cannoneer! Psi-Points: 37/100. Inside the tower!

[N-JOE-Fluke] 2/2 HP fluke singer 3/5 improved songwriter. Empowerment:

[Δ] The Great Healthbar: HP: 298,000/350,000. Linked to Walugi and the Citadel! Ascendency: Activates with JOE's consent upon the activation of Incarnate. Can be boosted by the actions of the post activating it. Can be Empowered further by the Circle of Lord Energy.

[N-Δ] [Jondanger23] [JOEbob] Armored Ten. 8/10 main HP 14/15 armor hp Threshold : 6k Blessing of the (Durable) Decagons (Can only take 1 HP at a time). Will revert to Jon if he rejoins. Bodyguarding the Great Healthbar.

[Δ] [JOE] Hives of Animation: 20,000 x 2 HP.
Second Generation JOEtillions - 25,000/25,000x2.


[N] [JoeBob] flame legion 10/10 HP x 2000. Doubled Attack power!*
*Guard disabled due to GM fiat.

[N] [JoeBob] Citadel of Golemancy - Immortal. Expansion: 1/3. Flame Legion: 0/5. Spawns worker golems. We can Rebuild: 5,000 HP regen. Cornfield x 4: 5,000/5,000. Spawns 20 sneks a round. Maize Maze: 3/3 hits. Each hit is 4,000 damage. Adds another 10,000 Regen.
Providing 10,000 regen


CONSTRUCTION: we are many. 12/21
Golems: 7x5000.
Golemguards: 30x1000.
Minigolems: 1000x4

[N-Construct] circle of LORD energy. 4000/10000 Lives sacrificed. Needs more power!

[N] baby fluke ???,???,???/9,000 8/18.

[N-Fluke] Baby Fluke. Provides improved empowerment! A colossal fluke: 8/9. Double action!


[N-Fluke]Lorny the Flukes 20,000/20,000 HP.

[N-Fluke] flukefred lon flukma 20,000/20,000 is an attorney

[N] Enlarged Dog 40,000/40,000 HP. EXPAND DOG: 2/2.


[N] snekpit: x306 sneks. Better at Fortressbuilding. One-time Player Action Buff (Only takes effect the round after it is used due to having to be used in the EoTB!) x100 Attack Sneks

[Δ] [JOEbob] Shade 1/1 HP. 2/5. Improved buffing. Double Action!

[N] Corny the Flukes 20,000/20,000 HP 2/2 corn 0/3 maize 3/4 flukification. 3/8 jokes on you.

[N] [JoeBob] Altar of the Cycle. 10/10 Incarnate. [Souls: 35 Golems]

[Δ-LEADER-Ω] Xylan - 86/100 HP.

[Δ]
- Heart of Destruction - 500,000/1,100,000. Is a literal, beating heart. Bodyguarded by all able Destroyer forces! Beat-Speed: [||||||||||||||||||||]

[Δ-LORD] LORD BRITISH. on his BIG BOTE. 25/25 HP.

[Δ-LORD]
THE COALITION 24/50 HP. Must be defeated to attack LORD BRITISH.

[Δ] LORD PRUSSIAN: 11/25 HP. Able to be attacked, even though bodyguards! Drill: [||] Dresden: [|||]

[Δ] LORD RUSSIAN: 12/30 HP. Able to be attacked, even though bodyguards! Great Patriotic War [||||].

[Δ] THE INVASION:
Regiments of Foot: 1,000 x 30
Regiments of Horse: 2,000 x 10
Regiments of Guard: 3,000 x 1
Regiments of Dragoons: 2,000 x 3.
Regiments of Cannon: 3,000 x 5.


Troop Transports: 10,000 x 4 5,000 x 2. Intensifying!
Even if the transports are dead, Lord Prussian will probably ensure a influx of troops and the like. At a much slower pace.

[Δ] The Grand British Fleet: Blockading the Island!

[Δ-ELITE] WaluigiBot
Immortal.
2/9 Weath of the Thyme. Waluigi's Special Course: 2/4 MOAR {|||}
Adaptations:
ULTRA SHOVEL PROJECTOR (Use 1 point from any of your abilities to gain a small damage boost!)
ANTI-PAST WOUNDS ARM FLAILING SYSTEM. (3,000 REGEN)
ARM FLAIL (Allows for ARM FLAIL CUT INS) SUPPLY OF PASTA (5,000 REGEN, BOOST TO PASTA SKILLS.)
PASTA SPOON (extra skilled at making pasta)
FOREHEAD CANNON (increased attack)
Thymium Shield Factory (2+ HP to shield).
French Stereotype-Class armor [Provides highly limited immunity to the OVERPOWEREDNESS stat]
TRUE RAPTURE MOLECULE MOLECULE [Limited Immunity to overpoweredness.]
Repetive Reactive Armor: Maxed out limited immunity to the OVERPOWERNESS stat.

[Δ] [Lytea] - Mages Water Mage 4/4 Fire Mage 4/4 Earth Mage 5/5 Air Mage 4/4

[N] [JOEbob] Vandeer Lorde: Electric Boogaloo. 230,000/230,000 HP. 2/3 dark creatures. 2/5 royal guard. 0/8 red moon. 2/6 absorb. 2.3 AC. Windy Dodging: 27% evasion bonus. Capped at 30. [A] custom Nice blade 0/5 parry.. parry.. parry... Parry Bar: 5/5. 25% chance of blocking attacks! Under the Bloody Moon: 5,000 damage per hit on basic attacks, up to 5 times. -10 accuracy for each successful hit past 3, counting previous hits. 3/4.

[N] [Ac] Frank - 15,000/20,000. JOB: PROFESSIONAL EDGELORD. PERKS: Gain Edgelord Points and use them against foes! JOB LEVEL: 3. (1 turns.) EDGELORD POINTS: 10


[N-PLAYER] JoeBob - 20/20 HP. 1 AC. [THYME!x0] {A} The Establishment: A Name: [llll]. A Destroyer: 3/3. A Metaphysical: 2/5. A Null: 0/7. A Scribe: 8/10.. [A] Colossal Fluke Core [A] wand of thyme. nigh-unstealable! returns to the owner after first loss! thymium! 2/3 Durable thyme 2/5 Wario thyme 2/7 durable!!!. Empowered by the Fluke Singer! Empowered by the Keksnipeblade!

[Ω-α] ThatOtherGuy - 41/50 HP. Godmodder! Lord of Tanks. [A] Denito Surrexit.

[Ω-PLAYER] Foodman - 16/20 HP. {A} Sál þjófur: x1.5 Damage Multiplier!

[N-PLAYER] ArcaneCynic - 20/20 HP. {A} 8ULLETS IN THE FIRE: Ammo: [l].
SPOILS OF WAR:
︻デ┳═ーーー
▬▬ι═══════ﺤ

Owned by joebob
Damage: Glorious. Ready!
Cooldown: 6/6 Turns.

COOPER-HAMMER

Owned by plague
Damage: Immense.
Cooldown: 10/10 Turns. READY!

INSANITY POGO
Owned by ArcaneCynic.
Damage: Okay.
Cooldown: 4/5 Turns. DEBUFFED OVER TO FIVE TURNS!
Perk: Deals 'insanity' damage that damages foe over time. READY!
TRICKSTHYME
Owned by TOG.
Cooldown: WAAAA
Perk: 50/50 chance to either mess up an entity or buff them extremely.

BRANCHINATOR
Owned by TOG
Cooldown: 4/15.
Perk: Splits TOG's body, allowing him to have multiple bodies. Cooldown doubles on every use.

Continuum Device:
Owned by JOEbob
Cooldown: 5/5
Perk: Allows for you to write up an attack, and, upon hitting the enemy, inflict Continuum Curse upon them, dealing a part of your attack's power in damage to to them until they die.

Lost Sword of El Dogron:
Owned by JOEbob.
Cooldown: 3/5. NOT READY!
Perk: Grants the target the Lost Sword Replica artifact, reducing incoming damage by 25% and increasing their base damage by 10,000 for as long as they hold it. The Replica lasts for one turn after the wielder dies/the Replica being stolen.

The TOG device:
3/5.
Owned by TOG.
Spawns a TOG 2 on use. READY!
 
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to do list: pill reforging, gloriously bland wall of sanity, weapons and stuff, bird, space-ships, aliens, out-dated jokes, pimping, flabs, dabs, fabs, jabs, undead cats

Red Legendary Moldy Cheese Wedge:
[+15% dmg, +10% spd, +5% crit chance, +10% size, +15% knockback] [Non-Euclidean]
15% increased base dmg, plus another 60.5% because of maths (calculations are crazy) and science (unless I was wrong about that. once again, I'm not sober). ignores up to 10% dodge. nat 20 = crit. knockback is a thing. causes insanity on crits.

Gunpowder's for chumps: 3 Psi points. attack an enemy
Solace: 3 psi points. can be used with any attack. attack ignores dodge.
Mind Palace: 7 psi points. 50% dodge for the round.
Mind Crush: 5 psi points. causes random negative mental effect (insanity, blindness, depression, blind rage, ect)
Null Lance: 10 psi points. ignores any damage reduction or chances to miss. cannot be blocked. penetrates through entities body-guarding target.
Shatter: 11 psi points. AoE attack that also Mind Crushes all targets. (targets are chosen randomly)
Fuse: 15-30 points, depending. use any of targets abilities. increase cost of psi points based on ability strength.
Mind Meld: Target must be willing. target is Mind Crushed. TOG II regains psi points.

Denito Surrexit, the Colors of the Universe, Cairo Overcoat, piece of Leather (to be used at a later date (secret plan)), Skeleton Brush/Flail! , Admiral's Cap, tons(-1) of candy corn (in the CO), local Big Bad Guy Corpse, Enny's liver in a bag of holding.

+2 ACk

I asked for some help cuz of the whole not-able-to-post-issue thing. I'm jsut gonna increase these by two this post instead of one. not three, mind you. just two.

(22} 22/?? maybe like a big 'splosion or somethin

(7 } 7/?? Attack of the Radioactive Hamsters From a Planet Near Mars

(7 } 7/?? cooling off with some Airconditiong


[8 } 8\[10] Blue Skadoo, we can too!

[8 } 8\[10] Return of the revenge of the RED BARON!

Blue!TOG II (psi-abilities in notes): shoot the coalition
GCeer: shoot the coalition
LORD FRENCH: GRAB DAT SWORD FROM TOG!


TOG and LF get into another scuffle trying to take rapture. Joe should've joined the ultimate alliance by this point and thus should be giving the sword to LF too. I dunno what happened to that, though.
 
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