DON'T BLINK- The Eye of Cthulhu's amazing adventures..

How could you ask someone to not blink after writing this thing. This is the most stupidest and hilarious thing I have read in almost two months.
I want more!
RIOT! RIOT! RIOT!
*Gets smashed by eye of Cthulhu*
"Well at least my mouth is intact."
EoC:"Hmm... This might help in talking with those humans."
"Nooo! Have mercy!"
*Gets attached to the eye ball."
EoC: "Aah, that's better."
 
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Ayy lmao
 
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I laughed at this one. There aren't many funny Terraria stories out there, but this tops them all, even the ones that don't exist yet. "Maybe it's because you're fat!"...i crie evrytime
 
New chapter: Slap Hand!

The EOC Proceeds to slap TOMMY in the face every time he moves with the severed hand. Then he runs away spinning around with his demon powers because he is a giant frickin eyeball who can do whatever it wants.

The EOC knocks on GUIDE's door.

GUIDE:
Who is it?

EOC:
A massive demon eyeball.

GUIDE:
Massive demon Eyeball who?

EOC:
Massive demon eyeball going to rip your useless face off.

GUIDE:
Come on in!

EOC bites of GUIDE'S hand.
 
So, in all seriousness, due to my laziness I kind have been neglecting you guys. To be honest, I suck at making commitments, and I probably can't maintain a stream of chapters for very long. On the other hand, everyone is actually being very supportive of my story. I am very impressed on how the Eye of Cthulhu's stupidity actually cracks people up! So i'm going to utilize your comments/reviews, and turn it in to a challenge of sorts. So, in my opinion, replies, weather serious or not, shows me that you want to see more, and my story is getting attention. Even if they are negative, you are still giving me support by bumping the thread, and everyone with a brain could figure that out. So 1 reply equals one new chapter. Now, please do not spam with useless comments just to milk more chapters out of me. I'm still a human being and can only get some much done. Thank you for spending your worthless time on reading this silly rant.
 
Finish Him

TOMMY enters with a stump where his left arm should be. Since he is left handed, he cannot use any weapons, and just resorts to punching the eye with his remaining arm.

EOC:
You even punch like a girl.

Splat!

The EOC watches as the chosen one, the one destined to kill Cthulhu's evil brother and save the world from the red disease that threatens to mutilate the land dies in agony. This brave and tragic death would be forever in the hearts in minds of the people who live in the houses that he built with....

EOC:
Meh...

The EOC flies away, because he didn't give a red.
 
Exploring

The Eye of Cthulhu goes exploring underground. No dip you buttface that's the name of the chapter.
EOC:
Hi skeletons!

Skeletons:
Oh dear.

EOC:
Remember last time? Yeah. I have hands now. do you have hands? LOL you do, but your not a friggin giant doomsday eye.

EOC:
Bring me gold, or I will slap you harder than a girl asked out by Cthulhu.

Skeletons:
Okay, your sexiness.

1 millennia later. it doesn't matter though because the player character is dead and the world seizes to exist. I would say your mind is blown but only people with IQ's the same as their shoe size read this story.

EOC:
Where's my gold?

Undead Miner:
I'm sorry sir, but all the gold in these caves have been mined. Even if there was gold, it wouldn't be enough to protect a highly delicate sensory organ that was not meant to be detached in the first place.

The Eye stares at the Miner menacingly. It even gave him a furious glare, which is physically impossible.

Miner:
UHHH. May I recommend mining the crimtane in the bloodied lands? There tons of it, and it gives lots of protection!

EOC:
TELL ME WHERE.

​
 
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