i still find it really weird that obsidian is the only whip mainly summoner armor, come on why not make more armors buff whips aswell rather than minions?
This is a good addition because it gives certain parts of progression in the Summoner Class
high points... in other words, it makes certain parts of the game feel unique & fun, a part that cannot be replicated much later on, meaning you can try to stick it out for a bit longer if you want to, or make the upgrades because you feel it's effectiveness tapering off. This is healthy for the game overall, as by the time Obsidian Armor can be replaced, you have access to DD2 sets, more Sentries & the option for more Minion types. It's a fun quirk, but that doesn't mean it has to carry over until endgame, it's not even necessary at that point anyhow.

like forbidden because i think that it fits with the armor's theme and to don't make whips too overshadowed by magic weapons since the armor is a hybrid of mage and summoner armor
Forbidden Armor is in the same boat as Obsidian, it was a fantastic, but previously
highly slept-on Armor Set with a fun quirk. You can actually use Forbidden Armor, all the way up to Lunatic Cultist if you want, where I feel it should finally be replaced afterward. It's arguably replaced by Dark Artist Set, which just swaps the Tornado quirk for more Sentry Slots+ Sentry bonus effects. I'd also argue that it's an endgame Armor Set, considering the synergy it now has with the buffed DD2 Weaponry.
spooky could also buff whips rather than minions, while having 1 less max minions than tiki, on 1.4 tiki got completely overshadowed by spooky wood, and i think that this could be reverted making spooky having again 1 less max minions than tiki but also giving whip buffs
Tiki is fine where it is, considering the fact that you can just buy it. It doesn't need any more buffs, as by this time you have access to some extremely destructive Minions & Whips that can be buffed with Flasks. You'll have more-than-enough accessories to play around with, that buffing it with quirks isn't really called for. It was fine in 1.3.5, it'll be fine in 1.4.1.
and finnaly stardust should have some whip buffs aswell, but not having nerfed minion stats since it would actually be great for both sides since it's the endgame armor
This Armor already has the Guardian quirk & obnoxious DPS, it doesn't need anymore buffs.
i also think that it would be awesome if we could control minions, using a summoner staff by holding the activation key, making they continuously attack in direction to the cursor independent of being an enemy there or not and still dealing damage to anything on contact with them or their projectiles, behaving like actual weapons, it would allow us to have a better accuracy against bosses and enemies that moves too fast since most minions have difficulties to hit them while they're moving
We already have a TON of new toys to play around with & if you like controlling projectiles, there are plenty of Mage Hybrid build you can play around with now, where controlling the projectile is part of the quirk. It's ok to let some Armor & Weapons stand out, as we've already lost so much uniqueness between Classes with the updates, allow them to hold on to the little they have left!