The Land of the Dead (Text Adventure)

While your character is very weak, I imagine that's the point of the character, if you want to be weak, don't let the others talk you out of it, it could allow for all sorts of interesting opportunities, I had a weak character like yours, he was fun to play, don't let these fellows talk you down from doing it, I'll be cheering for your neckbeard in the land of the dead if you go through with him, even if I likely will be the one who needs to kill you, due to being the monster man, it has potential to be hilarious. If I had a rankings list for apps I've analysed, you'd be pretty high up compared to a lot of other apps.

Yeah, I'm gonna roll with my character as-is. Worst case scenario, he dies and I make a new character.
 
Actually, you can revive your characters, I won't go into detail, but it's explained in the rules.
 
~~~~Radio~~~~


Jones: for our next story, the hunt for Notorious Crimelord Gregg continues over here in the northern district of 13th street. And unfortunately we STILL can’t find the elusive anubis. Big shocker.

By the way, for no real reason… i feel an urge to shout someone out. So shoutouts to Phaedra. I don’t know who you are Phaedra, but there ya go.


~~~~The Undying Ultimate Chimera (@Mr. Fury)~~~~
HP: Yes. LVL: 666
Current Location: The Savage Savannah: Grassland



The UUC goes over to the great baobab tree and smacks it with a stick, a large three eyed bug appears and swats the UUC with a rolled up newspaper, the UUC feels ashamed of himself and walks away sadly.

The UUC then gets a devious idea. And walks over to the leader of the scorpalo pack.
The UUC then whispers “Mcdonalds new Buffalo Scorpion fries.”
The Scorpalo leader just finished graduating from yale, and has the intellect to realize what was just said, it flees in fear with the others fleeing with it. One of them angerly stings the UUC getting the UUC stuck on it’s tail, dragging him with the stampede.
(Continued in wizardbois turn.)

~~~~The Despicable Varvin Arthan (@Person999)~~~~
HP: 231/271 LVL 4
Current Location: The Overgrowth: Grimwich City



Varvin touches the crystal. He doesn’t specify a location and is then tossed through space and time and lands in Grimwich city. He notices a huge crowd of various undead types, Phaedra and the doll/comatose man and a monk looking fellow. They are watching the nearby stage where a man with a cow skull for a head and fancy purple clothing is seen. He seems to be trying to recruit people.

~~~~The Somewhat “Nice” Phaedra (@Madder)~~~~
HP: 319/440 LVL:4
Current Location: The Overgrowth: Grimwich City
~~~And~~~
~~~~Magnus (@TheGuy)~~~~
HP: 452/452 LVL 2
Current Location: The Overgrowth: Grimwich City
~~~And~~~
~~~~Dollie (@Sky High)~~~~
HP: 200/220 LVL: 3
Current Location: The Overgrowth: Grimwich City
~~~And~~~
~~~~Brother Garrun (@IHATETHISSIGNUP / Jedinate)~~~~
Body HP: 210/210
Head HP: 200/200 LVL:2
Current Location: The Overgrowth: Grimwich City



Brother Garrun steps forward to volunteer
Phaedra asks dollie if they should join up with Garrun.
Just then the nearby mooncrystal glows as Varvin is spat out from it.

Asmodeus points to garrun
Asmodeus: Ah, you brave soul, you wish to volunteer on this mission to reclaim Alexandria?

~~~~Traumatized Greyton (@Xmax360)~~~~
HP: 301/301 LVL: 2
Current Location: Pumpkin Yard Autumn Fields
~~~And~~~
~~~~Fred (@Defure)~~~~
HP: 210/210 LVL: 2
Current Location: Pumpkin Yard Autumn Fields



Greyton: 300/301
Fred: 210/210
VS
Recon Mech: 0/60
Junkin: 40/100

Greyton punches the Junkin, it did 20 damage!
Fred shoots the Junkin! It did 40 damage!
The Ghost mug smacks Greyton with a Ghost Baseball Bat, it did 1 damage!
The Junkin leaps onto fred and forcefully shoves it’s fist down his throat!
It missed!

~~~~Benevolent Tingler (@Deputy Hue)~~~~
Body HP: 250/320
Head HP: 250/300 LVL 1
Current Location: Pumpkin Yard: Truce Town
~~~Party Member: Clockwerk~~~
HP: 600/600 LVL 1



Tingler presses the 3rd button. But since the remote is like a TV remote, he accidentally presses button 7, clockwerk spews out these noises:


Tingler is frightened by the fact that the devil is inside his robit, he then rapidly presses buttons until he hits the real button 3.

Clockwerk: OOOOOOOOOOOOhhh! How ya doin chump?
Now what?

~~~~Amenhotep (@TheSpeluknerv3.6.5.8.6)~~~~
HP: 50/50 LVL 1
Current Location: The Savage Savannah: Abandoned Mohawker Outpost


Amenhotep already opened the present last turn, and got the spirit silk that was inside..
Suddenly a rumbling is heard, amenhotep looks to his left and notices a herd of spooked scorpion-buffalos rushing towards him! He dodges out of the way just as the Undying Ultimate Chimera appears before him from the herd.


The UUC gets closer, it roars.

(This is the UUC’s chance to try to make the deal, likewise this is Amenhoteps chance to use the ward if he wants to.)

~~~NEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWCOMER ALERT~~~
~~~~Fedora Ron (@Matthus)~~~~
HP: 107/107 LVL 1
Current Location: Hell: Ruinous Road


Ron is seen laying on the desert sand, still unconscious. Two deer creatures walk up to him and drag him into the nearby ruins. They drag ron to a snake-like creature in purple leopard print clothes, pink sunglasses and ridiculous hair.
Deerablo: Lord Dmiitri, we found this neckbeard in the sand.
Dmiitri: Bleck! Kill it!
No, Wait.. Toss it into hell, we need another soul slave.

Deerablo: But… Satan Lou doesn’t do enslavement of damned souls
Dmiitri: Meh, well Louis doesn’t need to know about him, just like how he doesn’t need to know about our little “mining operation” now does he?
The Deerablo chucks the still out cold Ron into the fiery pits of hell.


???: Hey, Hey you, ya you in the fedora, Wake up.
Ron opens his eyes to see a one eyed beetle like creature floating before him.
Imp: Welcome to hell pally, i dunno how you got here past the Grim Reaper, But uhh.. Yeah, welcome.
The Imp kicks ron in the face as he is still waking up, he then flies off into the nearby ruins.

Rom looks around, there is a tree glowing neon colors nearby him, a present also nearby, a path going down deeper into the fiery pits of hell, and a path going up to a nearby ruin. Fresh air is coming from the nearby ruins.
Also seen in the distance is a lake of lava, a giant disco ball surrounded by a neon city, and a large tower in the other side of hell going upwards.
What now?

~~~~A new homo sapien known as Halt has decided to sign up for a form of entertainment on an online messaging board known as a Forum Game. and they are now going to start their turn at playing this form of entertainment on an online messaging board known as a Forum Game right at this point of time.~~~~
AKA
~~~~NEWCOMER~~~~
~~~~Grigor (@Halt)~~~~
HP: 325/325 LVL 1
Current Location: Savage Savannah: Near the Forest of Ropes


Grigor awakens in a savannah like area, near a huge mountainside and nearby a large dark misty forest, Grigor notices ropes and nooses hanging from the nearby tree branches. There is also a present nearby. A town is seen in the savannah in the distance as well.
What now?
 
The Chimera speaks to Amenhotep,
The puppeteer says you have a ward, he would like to have a word instead. I have a magical pity pass which works similarly, but an opportunity has come up, I'll give the pass to you if you take it.

There is a target the he wants; A man called "Phaedra", to sweeten the deal, you'll get the rights to a soul of a particularly idle fellow called "Magnus", you probably know what to do with that, but first...

1)He wishes for your body & soul to be labelled as "AFK-Farmable" or something, so that in the event you do not hold up to these conditions, I can collect when I choose.
2)A non-linear deadline of '25 updates' will allow you to try and get the target without me coming for you, if you do not track him down and corner him in the timespan of '25 updates', I will come to collect. It's a very generous deadline, you'll know you've failed if you see me before you find the target.
3)In the event you corner him, you'll open a trapped teleport present I'll hand to you, if you use said present outside this circumstance, I will come to collect.

Do you accept these terms?


◄►◄►◄►
The Junkin is still trying to gourdge Fred.

EDIT:Forgot some of the terms of that deal, added them back in, this is gonna be real interesting.
 
Last edited:
Grigor stared around the area. This wasn't like his old place, his own home. "Must have me been dreaming, or drunken all this time..." He still noticed a town, nooses and ropes, and a... present? Huh, interesting... He thought, as he stared at it. But it was tempting to open it. I just don't know when it'll become useful, but better if I open it now, I guess. That being thought, he started to open the present, him still confused what to think about. The city seems to be tempting to walk to, and the tree-voszka just seems like ordinary one... On the other hand, the forest seems quite... mysterious. He had yet to think about where to go, maybe because he was busy opening the gift box?
 
The Chimera speaks to Amenhotep,
The puppeteer says you have a ward, he would like to have a word instead. I have a magical pity pass which works similarly, but an opportunity has come up, I'll give the pass to you if you take it.

There is a target the he wants; A man called "Phaedra", to sweeten the deal, you'll get the rights to a soul of a particularly idle fellow called "Magnus", you probably know what to do with that, but first...

1)He wishes for your body & soul to be labelled as "AFK-Farmable" or something, so that in the event you do not hold up to these conditions, I can collect when I choose.
2)A non-linear deadline of '25 updates' will allow you to try and get the target without me coming for you, if you do not track him down and corner him in the timespan of '25 updates', I will come to collect. It's a very generous deadline, you'll know you've failed if you see me before you find the target.
3)In the event you corner him, you'll open a trapped teleport present I'll hand to you, if you use said present outside this circumstance, I will come to collect.

Do you accept these terms?


◄►◄►◄►
The Junkin is still trying to gourdge Fred.

EDIT:Forgot some of the terms of that deal, added them back in, this is gonna be real interesting.
Amenhoteph says
I do accept them.
He opens his hand to receive the pity pass.
By any chance do you know where I can find Phaedra?, If you want their soul, so much to make a deal, give me a hint.
 
Phaedra can't help but notice the odd feeling he has, almost as if an unstoppable, hungry being is speaking of him in a businesslike manner, and an unreliable wizard is signing his own death warrant...
Phaedra chooses to ignore the feeling.
 
Last edited:
Anucle; Sockmonkey367
Starting HP: 400
Race: Anubis
DT: 70
EC: 0
Cause of Death: I was in a DnD session with my friends, we were pretty high leveled, and we were fighting a level 5 mummy. For some reason it had an instakill spell. It instakilled me first, and i was so surprised it gave me a heart attack, and died.
Backstory: I usally played gamed with my friends, like DnD, and i enjoyed a peacful life. I was about 20 before i died, and the day after i died, it was my birthday, rubbing salt in the wound. I mainly played games with my friends, and had a decent childhood.
Appearance: An anubis, wearing some gold armor, with jade eyes
Inventory: New! Nintendo 3DS XL
Basic Attack: 15
Abilities: Firebolt, 20 FIRE damage. Recover, recover 20 health.
Perks:
Racial Perks: (Don't mess with this, depending on your race i'll add what needs to be added here...)
One Time Ability: Shooting out my claws, i do 40 damage

Would this work?
 
Anucle; Sockmonkey367
Starting HP: 400
Race: Anubis
DT: 70
EC: 0
Cause of Death: I was in a DnD session with my friends, we were pretty high leveled, and we were fighting a level 5 mummy. For some reason it had an instakill spell. It instakilled me first, and i was so surprised it gave me a heart attack, and died.
Backstory: I usally played gamed with my friends, like DnD, and i enjoyed a peacful life. I was about 20 before i died, and the day after i died, it was my birthday, rubbing salt in the wound. I mainly played games with my friends, and had a decent childhood.
Appearance: An anubis, wearing some gold armor, with jade eyes
Inventory: New! Nintendo 3DS XL
Basic Attack: 15
Abilities: Firebolt, 20 FIRE damage. Recover, recover 20 health.
Perks:
Racial Perks: (Don't mess with this, depending on your race i'll add what needs to be added here...)
One Time Ability: Shooting out my claws, i do 40 damage

Would this work?

Don't take my opinion too seriously, I am by no means an expert, but this character seems grossly underpowered. I suggest you give him some perks and make his one-time better. I don't like the first-person aspect of his story either. No offense, but he seems a bit half-baked.
But hey, wait until Mr. Fury or DGI see it before you make any decisions.
[doublepost=1548277310,1548277117][/doublepost]Sorry, i just edited that message 6 times since I read the app wrong.
 
My opinion on Anucle, the character of @Sockmonkey367 , the other people probably expect me to analyse this, but this is not an app analysis, because there's nothing much really to analyse, which isn't necessarily a bad thing; I'm gonna put the text wall in a spoiler.

This app could be potentially be instantly accepted, it's simplicity itself. I do get self-insert vibes from the first-person language though.

If I'm honest though, this character will probably wind up being incredibly boring to play, I'm sure the other 'veteran players' in this game are well aware that DGI often derives inspiration for his updates from the nature of a character being played, if you want to go through with this guy, you may have to pick up the slack with the personality.

In a previous game run by DGI, there was this character, let's call them 'Z-General', for anonymity's sake, who wasn't particularly interesting based on the character app, that DGI couldn't muster up a lot of inspiration for their turns after a few updates, because their character couldn't make up for their lack of interesting features with something else, like say... personality. On the other side of the coin, you have the Tingler, who doesn't really even directly speak in his turns, but they are generally filled with a lot of personality, like checking his rather sad wallet, or literally stealing the dirt other players were standing on, DGI clearly deeply enjoys writing his particular updates.

TL;DR without pulled punches:
While your character is very acceptable, you may have wound up making a very boring character, which will likely result in you having a boring time if you go through with them unless you have something interesting to make up for that, because DGI tends to make boring updates if he's bored while updating your character.
 
Back
Top Bottom