Serious Body Image and the way we think of ourselves

DeltaVii

DeltaVii

Retinazer
Let's get to the point first.

I'm in a health class, and today we were talking about body images and types. The pages from a textbook we read told us to always have a positive body image, no matter what. Keep your self esteem high, no matter whose opinion of you. I tossed the idea around in my head and came to the conclusion about what I thought about my body image:

Yeah, I'm not fit. I'm not very muscular. But I'm not really overweight. The thing is though, the things that influence our body image mostly come from other people, and what society thinks should be the norm (which is also influenced greatly by media). When I see someone who worked out a lot the past few months, I almost instinctively compare myself to them. Coming to the conclusion that, indeed, I would like to be more fit, less round. Here's the important part.

I think that it's what we do with these comparisons that make or break both our self esteem and body image. I take that desire, and make it inspiration. When you want to achieve something, you need to take the steps to get it. Not sit and complain, like many people seem to do with their body image. I think less of my body image than my friends think of it. When I say something about being heavy, I hear things like "Oh, you teenagers. Always thinking you're fat". As if this opinion can only become negative and destructive.

Ignoring the problem and preaching acceptance won't solve much.

So, mini rant over, What do you guys here think about your body image, or other's opinions about theirs? Also, how do you try to deal with stress? Hopefully this thread can lead to a good discussion.
-Delta
 
Last edited:
Well, I'm like perfect weight, I'm not very athletic, and I don't eat much.(I'm surprised i'm not underweight.)
I'm very nice, and all of my friends are nice. I have literally no bullies at my school.
I'm very good at all subjects in school.(except P.E.)
I think i'm a pretty good person.
 
IRL im tall for my age and quite skinny. i eat quite alot and run alot also and occasionally lift up large and heavy objects which could be the reason im quite strong. as for my smartness im very good at astronomy, spelling an some others. as for my personality i tend to joke around alot and im usually happy though i can get angry easily. i sometimes hold grudges against people i really dislike though ive only done that to 2 people so far though im a nice person. and for what i think of myself i think im pretty good though nowhere near perfect
 
First off, the thread title made me a bit ಠ_ಠ at first because it looked like a spambot thread title from back over at TO, hahaha.

I'm short and a bit overweight but not grossly so. I'm not particulaly active, but I do like to walk around quite a bit and I do volunteer at the zoo which gives me some lifting and more strenuous work from time to time. Once in a while, though, I start just feeling kinda gross, so I'll buckle down on some kind of diet to lose weight, not because of how I look (which I really could care less about), and more just because it feels GOOD to lose weight. I don't usually keep it off for long, though I think it'll be easier once I move out on my own and have to budget my food and do a lot of walking, ahahaha. =3=;

IMO, the media's pressure on "ideal" body types is pretty BS, but at the same time it's just not healthy to have a sedentary lifestyle. I just think that people should concentrate on health and comfort over physical appearance; fitness shouldn't be about looks, it should be about feeling healthy and energetic.

In a way, it's kind of what I say about art; people should compare their fitness progress with themselves, not with other people. Sure, it's good to look at someone who is more fit and say "I'd like to be that fit" but people shouldn't get down if they can't attain that at a very quick pace. Different people have different metabolisms and lose their pounds in different ways. Just keep an eye on diet and exercise, do some research, and settle into a regime, 'cause getting healthy isn't a race, it's a marathon. Even if it takes a month to shave off a single pound, that's still progress, and that effort shouldn't be downplayed.
 
I find that you should feel comfortable with yourself. Your opinion of how you look is the most important opinion of how you look. However, if you start to become unhealthy you should try to improve or, seek help. This is a state that only you can know, as after all you know you better than anybody else. However if people you know and trust bring up concerns about your body you should listen to what they have to say as they may be trying to help you.
 
Cansteam said:
Well, I'm like perfect weight, I'm not very athletic, and I don't eat much.(I'm surprised i'm not underweight.)
I'm very nice, and all of my friends are nice. I have literally no bullies at my school.
I'm very good at all subjects in school.(except P.E.)
I think i'm a pretty good person.
Click to expand...
This, minus the bullies part
 
I play Lacrosse for my College as a Defender. I'm in shape, but hell, I'm one of the shorter and slower guys on the team... And I'm 6' tall. Blame my endurance for my slowness, I can't do anything about unfortunately, I'm missing almost 1/4th of my left lung because I was born prematurely.

It's moments like those that get you down when you try to compare yourself to the others that are bigger, faster, and smarter. You look at them and probably say to yourself "Damn.. I put in so much effort like them.. And I'm just not good enough."

We have to realize and look back at ourselves in those moments. Are we doing the best we could be doing to promote our self image? Whether it be Socializing skills or self image, it needs to be asked either way. If we aren't doing the best we can, we need to take the initiative and make ourselves better people, and we also have no right to complain if we are not.

But, there is a bar to be set for everyone concerning these points. These range from physical, mental, and even post traumatic incidents that might hinder us. I'm slower due to a prebirth defect physically, stopping me from achieving a prime level in speed and endurance. This isn't going to stop me to try doing the best I can do to keep myself in shape though, and certainly won't deter me from trying my hardest.

All in all, we can do better when we look down on ourselves, because we must, and when we will, we achieve a grand sense of lasting accomplishment. But even at the point, we must strive always to be better.
 
Since everyone else here is talking about how they picture themselves...

I'm not athletic. I'm somewhat weak and bony in certain spots, mostly around my arms. At the same time, though, I'm... not overweight, just soft- although that's mostly around the stomach where I don't have any bones in the first place. It doesn't really bother me, since I hardly do any exercise outside of school sport and tennis each once a week, and I could be a lot worse.

OP, you make a very good point. Accepting the need for change is almost always helpful in actually making it happen, and a different approach needs to be taken when saying "I'm not fat/overweight" is more like denial than a positive outlook.
 
I generally dislike my body image for different reasons. Thanks to this town, I'm under a rather specific impression of what people consider "an ideal female." I do have my significant others who make me feel beautiful, but when I go into in public, I can't help but feel like I'm being scrutinized for not fitting the bill. Is it all in my head? Quite possibly. Am I insecure when I probably shouldn't be? Probably. But the company of females that I keep generally fall into the category of "more desirable" in the eyes of this town (or maybe in my head, I don't know.)

I am short. Very short. I'm not small chested, I'm flat chested. I don't wear sexy clothes, I wear plain boring dresses. My hair is almost too long, coming to a stop at the back of my ankles. I have the power to turn heads around here, sure, but that's because I look so blatantly different than all the girls that are around here, and that's probably not a good thing. I get noticed for being "odd" and treated as such by people. And I have scars in places that shouldn't have scars, and in places that aren't always easy to hide. Compared to my roommates and significant others, I quite consider myself a mess. Almost inferior, really. I'm afraid to go into public beyond my little sphere of being comfortable, and when I do, I'm accompanied by one of a few girls that I'm dating, who are a decent 5-9 inches taller than myself, have a bigger chest, hair that isn't boring, and relatively flawless skin with no scars, and they're capable of talking. And the fact that I look like I'm 15 at the age of 25, older than most of the people I'm dating, probably doesn't help either.

But as far as athleticism, as other people have brought up, I'm probably at my peak. Not overly muscular, but fairly toned. Extremely flexible, at a decent weight. (Some say I'm underweight, but I find it impossible to gain weight, even with my fat-heavy diet.) I'm proud of my physical status, it's mainly just my appearance I struggle with. But I do take pride and comfort that my friends and family and significant others insist that I'm beautiful either way, and lately, I've been really feeling that way too. Despite hiccups I get in public, such as people blatantly making fun of my appearance (for being short and flat chested), maybe they're not exactly being as malicious as they seem, and maybe it's all in my head.

But that being said, a lot of people say that you can just ignore people who are putting your self-esteem down, but it's sometimes just never that easy, and sometimes you can't ignore it at all. That being said, it's going to be up to you, and maybe some of your close friends, who are going to need to try and reverse that damaged self-esteem. I probably couldn't do it on my own, that's for sure, it's okay to rely on your friends to help you out. My rant aside, all I'm getting at, is sometimes all the issues are in your head. That doesn't mean they don't exist, it means they exist in one of the few places that matter, as a negative outlook of yourself can transfer to how you behave and how other people might perceive you anyway. It's the power of mind-over-matter, except working in the opposite direction. So the first step to bettering one's self image is to not have such a negative opinion of one's self to begin with. It's okay to want to change how you look, and better yourself. But don't try to "better yourself" just to fit someone else's standards. Don't try to change yourself, just because you're under the impression that the "you" you currently are is bad. That's not as helpful as people might think it is. Instead, try to see yourself from someone else's point of view, and give yourself constructive criticism with what you might change. Treat yourself like you might treat someone else, so you don't fall into the habit of downing yourself.

Not to sound like an after-school special or anything.
 
I only care about my body enough to ensure it keeps on working. If doing what I like makes me gain weight, then so be it, I will not waste my time doing things I find boring just to adhere to some arbitrary standards.

I'm not fat - I walk a lot, I play amateur football and I burn calories in other ways. I just find no use to gyms - using it just enough to keep a "good" figure would be a waste of time, and if I did bother being serious about exercise, it would increase my body weight. Fun fact for those who think weight is reduced by gym stuff: Muscles weigh more than fat. By the flawed, arbitrary "ideal weight" crap used in the U.S., Vin Diesel is obese.

TL;DR version, when it comes to my own body, I can only answer "DILLIGAF."
 
As a teen, I was very fat. In my army days, I had actual muscles. Nowadays, I'm thin and scrawny.

Stopped giving a crap ages ago.
 
I've always hated exercise and combined with being an extremely picky eater I wasn't super healthy when I was very young. I did take up Tae Kwon Do during High School which was my main source of exercise, and at the same time I slightly expanded the things I was able to eat so I could eat Lettuce, Tomatoes, Cucumbers, and Orange Juice so that I was able to eat a little healthier. (This is coming from someone who risks vomiting if they try to eat anything related to Steak, Pasta, Cereal, Fish, Eggs and other things)

I don't consider myself too unhealthy. I think that eating and drinking Fruits/Vegetables/Sandwiches and Orange Juice on a daily basis helps to somewhat make up for my lack of exercise. And I rarely ever get sick. I still go on walks occasionally, though I could use more. Working out and doing things like jogging/running, and lifting weights that cause me to sweat and feel icky are not things I find fun and I would rather avoid doing those things if possible.

I don't care about being the most athletic person ever, though I do care about getting overweight which is why I could use more exercise to prevent this.

My body image is still not something I feel good about. My family and other people do say that I look attractive, but whenever I look in the mirror I find it hard to look at that other person in it. And this may be due to the way society forces us to see someone's else's body as "the ideal body figure" and if you don't look like that then you're nothing is what the message seems to be. There are still the people who do put your self-esteem down which Tsuki talked about earlier in this thread. Getting away from the types of people who cause that feeling is important, since that is the start of recovering from the low self-esteem feeling. It can't simply be ignored. Family and good Friends are great for helping a person recover from feelings of inferiority.

While not feeling good about how I look physically is part of the reason. It isn't the main reason I keep my gender hidden on the Internet. I don't mean that I look unattractive. I can't take my own word on whether I am or not since I have no way of knowing. I do wish I looked different somehow, though I guess how I look is okay.
 
Update on myself because Aurora necro'd this thread (it's almost a year old, wow!). I've joined my school's cross country team to make myself exercise, and after about 3 weeks of being injured with the ailment Shin Splints I'm getting back into running shape. Last wednesday I competed in my first meet, and while I was told to go easy, it still felt amazing. I hope to be really in to the schedule very soon, and lose some fat with all the running.

I've been slightly considering doing a minor diet, but the main problem is convincing my parents to do it with me. It'd just be a tough conversation to go through. My main fear with being even slightly chubby is that I want to be an active old person, and not be health-imparingly(does this word work? lol) obese. I suppose I subconsciously think the farther away from that I am, the better.

With a future career of sitting in front of a computer for hours at a time, the harder I work to be fit the more I can be good later in life.

Thanks for all the replies to one of my more serious threads.
 
I think the only thing really wrong with me is my teeth. After drinking so many cokes in the past (seriously I had a full blown cokacola and grape soda addiction complete with withdrawals) with out brushing as much as I should they really got out of control. I don't really care what people think about it because I am living my punishment for not brushing my teeth and I can always scare kids into brushing their teeth. I am somewhat overweight because my original plan to gain weight so I don't look like a lanky monstrosity also went out of hand (and the cokes didn't help). But I am slowly getting that back under control.

Nothing else I can really think of.

But really I don't give a :red: about what people think and if I don't know you that is going deep into the negatives. I probably should but I don't.

And yes, kids, brush your :red:ing teeth or you will have a bad time. And floss too because not flossing is where a majority of the damage can come from.
 
Last edited:
I hate my body, but I sort of feel like it's justified. The fact that I'm roughly 6' 1" doesn't pair well with my ridiculous metabolism and meek appetite... I'm pretty far underweight.

It sucks having people shame you for how skinny you are (which is VERY MUCH a thing and hurts a ton), but I'm happy I've had that "push" to better myself. I've gained 5 pounds this last month, which I'm pretty proud of.

As for other people's body images, I haaate seeing people despise their bodies when there's no problem at all ;-;. Thicker/ chubby guys are insanely cute imo, as long as you aren't to the point where it's a health risk. As for people who are far over/underweight... Yea, some changes need to be made. No one should be harassed over that, however.
 
I am surprisingly healthy considering my.. conditions.
I seem pretty I guess, fat, 218 lbs.. and I'm 13. (My profile age is misleading, someone change it now) Though an advantage is being tall. I am often one to scare others because of my.. eternally depressed look and just how I look in general. Not considering I also wear dark colors so that plays a little role.

Thankfully I'm not really messed with, but in all seriousness, I wish I had a little more muscle than fat so 218 lbs. wouldn't matter a whole lot.
 
Tsuki said:
My hair is almost too long, coming to a stop at the back of my ankles.
Click to expand...
See, some would be very envious of your hair. Like me. I always try to get it longer but it seems like my hair just doesnt want to. Id love my hair to be chest if not waist long.
As for it being boring, im just gonna say you're mistaken, with hair as long as this, you're able to have frisures other people could only dream of (hell, the to the ankles one is one of them) so if you ever feel like your hair is boring, style it up!
My half sister also has hair like this and people also look for two reasons really, first, of course its a unusual lenght since few people can even reach such lenghts so it stands out and second, its a looker. Seriously, it looks awesome and when she borters to style it with complicated braids and what not, people are outright dazed.

As for myself, i have the same broblem with scars. They dont look nice and represent embarrasing moments in my life open for everyone to see, constantly reminding them and myself of that time... id rather have them gone. Tops with an open back? Haha, forget that. Short sleves? Shoulderless? Right, show everyone how much of an :red:up i was/am.
Other than that i am more or less okay with my looks, im fit, not overweight, not underweight. Of course, theres a few things id like to change but overall im content with my looks.
 
Really, my body is a pretty good body for a boy. Except I'm not a boy. I feel like I look too masculine, and so I try to make myself appear more feminine than masculine. I'm starting to get the androgynous look down, but I still feel too much like a boy.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom