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However, as alienating as it might sound, those quarks would form mesons because of the temperature, allowing the remenants of me to collide into eachother at the mass-energy equivalence. This would allow new quarks/hadrons/mesons/bosons to form- making myself into QGP would be an event to be excited by! However, it would dissipate incredibly quickly- but that's the only use of me I can find.

what

this has no relation to the status what so ever

or is this a ship thing

It does: that was an extremely sweaty status.

but that would be at the point where hadrons couldn't even form

forbidding the creation of sweat

Source: 345MeV is 3.7terakelvin

Very true, but there'd be a parallel universe or two where the transformation wouldn't complete, but the intention would remain the same: then the sweat would pour most vigorously, in vain effort to make up for all that was lost.

so a parallel universe where the heat here is instead 3.45eV

sorry mate, states are still the same according to this half A press

Before the event, then - just when you'd thought it up, then the sweat already started coming. Sweat's like Thoughtcrime - it doesn't have to be instigated by something actually happened, just something that inadvertently demands its presence...