Sorry it's 2:30 am and I'm seeing meowmeres
Because 2:30 am is a perfectly reasonable time to write a informative guide.
(Says the guy at 3:30 a- shut it)
(Use heart crystals anytime you see em!) As soon as you spawn, look for the crimson. If you got corruption it is OK; however you will miss out on good stuff. Go to the living tree, chopping any smaller trees in the way. Raid the chest and set up shop in the small room. Go back to the surface and loot surface cave chests to get the magic mirror.
What? You're talking about life crystals, before even starting the game! You then say to head to the WORST place POSSIBLE to be right as you start. Also Living trees do not always spawn in worlds, and also don't always spawn with rooms. So so far you have told someone about something they will not see for a while, then tell them to head to almost certain death, while looking for something that might not be there, which would have 4 outcomes.
- They don't have it, and look for twenty minutes for one and give up and continue on.
- They find one, and it has a room, and they loot it and set up shop.
- They find one without a room, and spend the next half hour tearing the tree down looking for one.
- They find the Corruption or Crimson first, and die many horrible deaths until giving up.
Then you tell them to go loot the Magic Mirror from Wooden Chests, except it can't be looted from Wooden Chests, so again they waste time looking for nothing. Which means night comes, they die, and have to get back to their tree home, or build their own home.
. Take shurikens, throwing knives, iron, and torches. Mine 20 stone. Head back to the tree room and craft a furnace. If you don't have a crafting table, make and place one. Craft an anvil. If you don't have iron/lead (I'll just say iron) go and mine any visible from the surface. Go back and craft an iron chestplate. If you have more iron craft boots or a helmet. Make wood boots.
So, currently this part has the player grabbing:
- Shurikens
- Throwing Knives
- Iron
- Torches
- 20 stone
- a Furnace
- Workbench
- Anvil
- Iron armor
- Wood Boots
Now I get that they will get the first 4 from the surface chest wild goose chase, and the stone is a given, but how could you forgot to tell them:
- Who the hell the Guide is
- Make a workbench
- How to get or craft almost everything so far
- Valid housing
- Any and all combat basics
- Walls
- How to get other Town NPCs
- What to do if you don't have a base and night falls
- AVOID THE CRIMSON/CORRUPTION YOU WILL DIE
- Accessories and armor
These ten things are all basics game mechanics that should've been included at the beginning. And why tell them to make two pairs of greaves?
You'll be using that to fight the eye of cuthulu
The grocery list you told them to get is obviously meant for veterans of the game, and even then is pretty hard. Good thing they have two pairs of boots, though.
Also you just mentioned a kinda important name without any explanation or context.
Go mining for iron or just craft a wood/iron hammer.
"Go mine for iron, or just go make an iron hammer which you totally have the materials for, or just make things easier on yourself".
Not a very good way of wording, and the wood hammer is good enough for it's purpose.
Break pots in surface caves or at the dungeon.
So wait, they've now beaten Skeletron? Did I miss something? Also what is the purpose of breaking pots?
Gather at least 20 bombs and head to the crimson/corruption. Break two shadow orbs.
Oh, to get bombs. But 20 bombs from surface pots? That is almost impossible. Also you forgot to say:
- Don't die from the thorns
- Don't fall to your death
- Don't die from monsters
- Don't die from your own bombs
- Don't drown
- Don't break a third orb
- Don't trap yourself in with the unbreakable stone
- Don't just quit when you don't get exact 20 bombs, and get the Demolitionist
- Don't forget to collect the loot
- Don't forget to equip the light source in it's equipment slot
- Don't forget to read the section on equipment slots that would hopefully be added in
- Don't die from a mix if all of the above
- Don't die from being away from your computer
- Don't die from Potion Sickness
- Don't die from falling sand
That is FIFTEEN avoidable deaths just from instruction, and none of the threats of the biomes are even MENTIONED.
Every night kill the Demon Eyes.
This is acceptable.
Craft the Suspicious Looking Eye.
They don't know where to craft it at, what it needs to be crafted with, or how many you need.
If you have a Magic Mirror (MM)
That abbreviation is only used once, to save time for the writer.
go to the ocean and try to get a Trident from the chests. No luck? MM out and check the other. Loot chests in surface caves and hope for a spear. If you can't get one, get a bow with flaming arrows.
This is fine, except the Eye is never mentioned once except in
You'll be using that to fight the eye of cuthulu
and no preparation is covered. And how are they supposed to know where the oceans are? They're sorta difficult, if not impossible to get to with the grocery list from earlier. Also not covered is the Goblin Army, or the Goblin Tinkerer. And killing the Eye with a spear is overall a bad idea.
Go to the jungle and mine gold
What? They only have iron armor and a bow, and now they're in the jungle? You can find gold underground, much easier!
This is the most tedious part. Make a gold pick.
Yes it is, due to there being a much easier option.
Also, why Gold? Gold I'm pretty sure can't mine anything new but Meteorite, and bombs do a much better job at that.
Also you excluded Platinum from this.
Now it's time for a choice. For under 5 hours go to the crimson or corruption. For potentially over wait for a meteor. Bust the third.
And now for vague direction that skips all important details, like:
- Why go to a meteor
- Where a meteor is
- Why go to the evil biomes
- Third what?
For the brain use a spear to keep the creepers at bay and make sure you are in an open place.
You say open place while they are in a tight cave without being told any arena preparation. Also, when you say "use a spear" if RNG hates them they'll fight this thing with the Spear they got before hand. And die. And they weren't told about it's summoning item so they assume they can't fight it again. Also how would they know which biome gets which, or even that one was exclusive to just one biome?
For the worm use rope to get to the surface and use shurikens.
Should've told them about the ropes beforehand, and again no arena at all.
If there are six hearts or orbs fight it again. If not make a new world and break the orbs.
Ummm, do
you even know about it's summoning item?
Kill it and go back. Go to your house and make shadow/crimson/meteor armor and go to the dungeon. Use shurikens and spears.
Again with ignoring Skeletron, so chalk up several deaths to the Dungeon Guardian.
Also they have specialized armor, yet no weapons of specific classes that they have access to are covered, and they're still using weak
start of the game weapons. Also not covered are:
- King Slime
- Queen Bee
- Mounts
- Death
- The entirety of the underground
- ANY USEFUL ITEM
Go in and grab a water candle and a wooden platform. Find an open room and place the candle on the platform. Break pots and kill dungeon slimes.
This part needs a little more detail, but is fine.
Go to the underworld and build a bridge 1300 blocks long. Kill the voodoo demon. Throw the doll. The guide moved into your tree room. Kill the wall with a spear, minishark, or muramasa.
And then they died due to using vastly underpowered items for the fight. The Minishark would be fine if you covered any form of ammo, which they don't have due to never getting any more houses or NPCs. They wouldn't have the Minishark at all.
Then imagine your master chief and teabag the WoF gore. PROFIT
Please tell me this is just the lack of sleep talking
All in all, the guide also missed
- Potions
- Flasks
- Rain
- Slime Rain
- Blood Moon
- Mushroom biome
- Granite and Marble biomes
- Dyes
- Paint
- Banners
- Heart Lanterns, etc.
- Fallen stars
- Mana in it's entirety
- and probably more.
