Greenie
Retinazer
Wait, is it actually 12?
*Checks HP*
Oh. Yeah, I'm up to 12. I'll find some way to fit in that correction.
ONE LIFE MAN (Hardcore Terraria Playthrough)
- Thread starter Greenie
- Start date
*Checks HP*
Oh. Yeah, I'm up to 12. I'll find some way to fit in that correction.
thegamer381
Terrarian
What world size are you playing on?
spongedog
Skeletron Prime
The alerts help me know when a new chapters up.
Greenie
Retinazer
I'm playing on a medium world. I know small worlds are the more preferred choice for challenge playthroughs (or at least they are for Yrimir), but medium worlds feel like they have more stuff in them. Or at least it feels that way to me.
Also, Chapter 10 is up now!
thegamer381
Terrarian
PART 11 HYPE!!! I HOPE HEY GETS NIGHTS EDGE SOON!!!
thegamer381
Terrarian
Ha, you think homework causes delays? Come back when you have exams.
Greenie
Retinazer
Continued from original post
Chapter 12: Through the Fire and the BEES!
And now, after defeating King Slime, I have come to defeat the Queen Bee!
General strategy is to stay on my platform unless I need a buff from the honey and try to use ranged weapons. Could do this with my Blade of Grass, but ranged weapons like the Boomstick and Thorn Chakram make this easier.
Wait, I forgot to restock on bullets for my Boomstick. Never mind about that one then, just going to be using the Thorn Chakram.
Not actually too concerned about this fight. The Queen Bee really could be considered an early game boss, given how easy she is. Only reason I didn't decide to go after her sooner is because I would have to explore the jungle first, and I at least wanted shadow armor before going there.
And there we go, another boss fight finished without any trouble. Wait did I just get what I think I got?
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!
SHOUT OUT TO MY BOI RNJESUS! YOU'RE THE GREATEST, BRO!
This. This right here. Is the definition of euphoria.
Oh and I also got a Beekeeper. Maybe I should replace my Blade of Grass with that.
Looks like a Witch Doctor has already shown up. Too bad all I'm going to do is buy an imbuing station from him and forget he ever existed.
WAIT WHAT? COME ON ALL I DID WAS LOOK AT THE BEE LARVA AND IT EXPLODED! I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TIME TO FINISH MY PLATFORM!
"Hey are you sure you should be fighting the Queen Bee? Doesn't look like you did a very good job of preparing your arena."
"SHUT YOUR FACE, GUIDE!"
And another one survived...
Course' if I really needed to I could have just teleported out, so I was never in any real danger.
"I'm sure that's what you were thinking a minute ago."
Got a Bee's Knees off of that so...guess I don't really need to get a Minishark anymore? Might still get one, but as someone who isn't going to be a ranger, this might be a better option. I have all I really wanted to get from the Queen Bees, including the extra Honeyed Goggles that I wasn't expecting to get.
So, I've been thinking, and I know what I want to do next. Last time I was underground I stopped at the underworld, but I should be able to handle myself down there now, so that's where I'm going next.
"I'll be waiting here if you need treatment for lava burns."
"Bring back something worth some good money, will yeh?"
One quick thing I wanted to do before I go into the underworld. Some of you may question why I think the Bee's Knees is better than the Minishark.
I CAN SHOOT HOMING BEES! WHY WOULD I NOT WANT SOMETHING THAT DEALS GOOD DAMAGE AND SHOOTS HOMING BEES?
It's a really long trip down here. I should probably do something to fix that in the future.
Well, I would introduce the location myself, but I think this guy would prefer to do it.
"WELCOME TO THE UNDERWORLD, HOME OF THE UNDERWORLD, CAN I TAKE YOUR ORDER?"
The stone here I've heard is perfect for making tools and armor. Don't feel like jumping into lava to get it, so I'm just going to mine in safety from these house...tower...things.
Oh wait, I just remembered I don't have an obsidian skull on me. This next house is going to be a lot more painful than I'd like it to be.
WOAH WAIT WHAT IS THAT? IS THAT...
"ONE LIFE MAN, WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T LET THAT THING DROP WHAT IT'S HOLDING INTO THE LAVA."
"Actually, I know exactly what that thing it's holding is. That's a voodoo doll of you, isn't it?"
"NO, REALLY, TRUST ME ON THIS ONE, YOU DO NOT WANT TO KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN IT GETS THROWN IN LAVA."
"There's a 50/50 chance you're lying on that one just to get out of getting burned by lava. In case you're not lying though, I'll just leave this voodoo demon alone and nothing will fall in the lava. I need to go back up to get an obsidian skull anyways."
This happened again on the way back down.
Alright, as you can see, I can now stand on this stuff. Back to mining then.
This locked chest here looks suspicious. Too bad I haven't found a key for something like this yet.
"Hey Guide, anywhere I can find a key for this chest?"
"You'll find one soon, hopefully."
"Some help you've been."
Again with the coin portals...
Back from mining, and I have a good number of hellstone ingots now. Remember that Enchanted Boomerang I found a while ago? This is what I wanted to do with it.
FULL SET OF ARMOR! With that completed, I should be safe from pretty much everything.
"Have you seen that old man walking around the dungeon? He doesn't look well at all..."
"Actually, I have seen him. He's creepy and weird looking."
"Maybe that should be your next stop."
If I'm going to do anything relating to that dungeon, I might actually want a Minishark after all. Just going to pick this up before I head off.
Being able to do this is still complete euphoria.
LOOK HOW HIGH I CAN FLY NOW I NEEDED GRAVITY POTIONS TO GET HERE BEFORE!
And back to this creepy place.
"Hey old man, got some people back home who are seriously creeped out by you, myself included. What's your problem?"
"My master cannot be summoned under the light of day."
"Oh so now I have to wait all day for you to be ready? This had better be worth it."
HARDCORE PARKOUR! I can't really do parkour if I'm flying...
"Hey old man, it's dark. Can your 'master' be summoned yet?"
"Come back at night if you wish to enter."
"SURE LOOKS LIKE NIGHT TO ME, CAN YOU JUST GET ON WITH WHATEVER THIS IS?"
"My master cannot be summoned under the light of day."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
Goblin what? Ok.
"Alright, is it night enough for you now?"
"Stranger, do you possess the strength to defeat my master?"
"What? Is this some kind of rhetorical question?"
"Please! Battle my captor and free me! I beg you!"
Chapter 13: Spooky Scary Skeletons, Coming to Rip Out Your Spine!
WHAT THE CRAP THAT OLD MAN JUST EXPLODED INTO A GIANT SKELETON!
"FER YER INFORMATION, THAT'S SKELETRON!"
I made some extra flat space for a reason, and this is it right here. Generally for Skeletron, it doesn't really matter if you use melee, ranged, magic, or summoner weapons, they all have their good points in this fight. Since I have a Flamarang and a Beekeeper, I'll be using primarily melee. Might still give the Bee's Knees or the Minishark a go just for fun. All in all, Skeletron is a pretty basic fight, and you really only need to worry about him if you don't have good armor or weapons (although Yrimir might disagree). I'm doing well on both of those, so there's no way I'm losing this.
Oh no. A slowly spinning skull. Whatever will I do.
"THIS 'ERE IS MY MOST POWERFUL ATTACK! DON'T YEH UNDERESTIMATE IT!"
"That old man was way over hyping you, you know. A REAL challenge would have been fighting those dungeon guardians you keep downstairs."
"YEH REALLY WANT TEH FIGHT ONE A' THOSE? I'M NOT STOPPIN' YEH IF YEH WANT TO, BUT I THINK YEH'D BE...
BONED!"
"I think the internet has had enough pun making skeletons for one year, don't you?"
One arm down, one more arm and a head to go!
"Actually you really just need to take down the head."
"Well I'm probably going to take down his other hand anyways. If I can find some way to artificially extend this chapter a bit more, I will."
"Hey, we're supposed to stay quiet about that tactic."
Oh, and there goes the other hand anyways. Never mind, can't use that to extend the chapter. What's this guy made of anyways, something weak like paper mache?
"PURE BONES! I JUST NEEDED TEH TAKE SOME CALCIUM PILLS!"
THIS IS IT, I'M ABOUT TO WIN!
SKELETRON HAS BEEN DEFEATED! WE'RE IN ENDGAME TERRITORY NOW, BOYS!
"Or so you think."
"There's something big you're not telling me about, isn't there?"
No time to waste getting answers now, I have a creepy dungeon to explore. Time to see what that old man was hiding down here...
If I really want to know, that is.
AHA! Here's something that I was hoping would be closer to the surface when I first discovered this place. This is probably going to be the last magic weapon I get, unless I get lucky enough to find something better.
Oh great. More skeletons.
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH WE ARE GOING TO RATTLE YOUR BONES!"
More locked chests. Why do I keep finding these locked chests. That sounded like a song title of some kind...
"..."
"..."
"This isn't what it looks like."
"Whatever you say."
"One Life Man I suddenly feel very uncomfortable about this place."
"Right then, so, you're free to go now. If you need a place to stay, I built a small village just to the east of here. I'll be taking my leave now."
"No, really, the only reason why I was tied up was because a few days ago I was hired by that old man to install some lights in here or something. As soon as I got here, he tied me up and threw me down here. Don't know why, but if that makes you feel less uncomfortable, now you know why I'm here."
"I'll take your word for it."
"Before I get going, I think I lost one of my contacts down here."
Wait, who's this a voodoo doll of? Kind of looks like that old man, but...I don't think he's a clothier. Is he? Meh, not much use anyways, he exploded into a giant skeleton.
I'm not sure what kind of dungeon this is. It's got like... books and...stuff.
"From what I understand, this place used to be owned by a mage guild. They used to do all kinds of research on magic, alchemy, and summoning down here. It's been abandoned for quite some time though. Either someone went a bit too crazy with necromancy in here, or these skeletons are supposed to be guarding the knowledge they left behind."
"Hm. If this place was owned by mages that must explain why-"
"Why everything here is too complex for you?"
"Well you don't have to put it so plainly."
Ok, an alchemy table. I know how to do a bit of alchemy. Maybe I can get some use out of this. Hey, what's down that pit?
OW MY EVERYTHING. LONG STORY SHORT, A SKELETON PARTY WAS DOWN THAT PIT. AND SPIKES. AND A DART TRAP.
"NURSE PLEASE HELP I AM IN NEED OF YOUR SERVICES."
"Normally I would ask you where it hurts, but...here I think it would be better to rule out what doesn't hurt."
I'm ok now, the Mechanic is here, and I finally remembered to fix this side of the roof. I'll be taking a quick break from exploring that dungeon for now. In the meantime, I'll just be doing something that doesn't require risking my life as much, like building.
OH COME ON!
Chapter 14: The Bone Zone
Just one thing after another around here, isn't it? First I almost get killed in the dungeon, now a blood moon.
"You know I have some special ammo for sale just for nights like these."
"Really?"
"Silver bullets? These are zombies we're dealing with here, not werewolves."
"Shows how well you know your guns and ammo. These silver bullets aren't just for killing werewolves, they're also much more powerful than regular bullets. They make especially good Minishark ammo."
"Really? Give me as many as you've got."
Several hours of killing later, the blood moon has passed. Should be safe to start building again.
Why.
"HAVE I FINALLY KILLED ENOUGH SLIMES FOR YOU?"
"FOOL! You may have gotten lucky last time, but NOT THIS TIME!"
"AUGH!"
"NOW LET ME WORK IN PEACE."
Didn't even drop anything interesting.
I was finally given enough time to finish the couple extra houses here. Now I'll get going back to the dungeon.
Oh hey there's a clothier here now.
"Wait I recognize you."
"EVIL!"
"FIRST THE MERCHANT, NOW YOU!"
Screw this place, I'm going back to the dungeon.
So that pit I fell down last time? This is it. Like I said, dart trap and spikes. There were a couple skeletons here too, but I took care of them.
Just got a tally counter. I'll have to see what I can make with this.
Got a golden key off of one of these skeletons and used it to unlock this chest. Too bad all that was in it was another shadow key.
"Hey, did you even show when you got the first shadow key?"
"Crap I don't think I did. Ok, it went something like this:"
"WOOOOOW A GOLDEN KEY CAN UNLOCK A GOLDEN CHEST! AND INSIDE THE CHEST WAS ANOTHER KEY!"
"GOD ONE LIFE MAN WHY ARE YOU SUCH A SCRUB GIT GUD!"
*ANGRY AT GUIDE NOISES*
That's basically how that went. I think this is the kind of key I need to open those chests in the underworld. Enough of that, what kind of chest is this and how do I open it?
"That...is something you don't need to worry about right now."
"Great. More secret stuff for later."
WOAH WHAT DID I JUST RUN INTO!?
"WELCOME TO OUR SKELETON PARTY HUMAN! ONLY SKELETONS ARE INVITED!"
"THIS is why I'm glad to have a water bolt."
What...what are those crabs doing down here? Like, how are they even here?
"Some statues can spawn enemies if they're powered with wire. The crab statue over there must be hooked up to a pressure plate."
"That would have been a nice thing to know before."
There's an Aqua Scepter here but...I don't think it's going to replace my Water Bolt.
What's this voodoo table here?
"Exactly what it looks like. A voodoo table."
"SKELETON GLITTER!"
"HELLO, TELEPORTING GLITTERY SKELETONS!"
Oh, ok, just a random handgun inside this old structure formerly owned by mages. Makes perfect sense if you don't think about it.
"Makes about as much sense as there being a musket inside one of those party balls of doom back in the corruption."
"That was actually inside the shadow orb? I thought the shadow orbs just...I don't know...summoned random objects from other places."
I guess not all chests down here are locked. Only the gold chests with good stuff in them are.
Magic Missile? Sounds cool, so I'll give it a try.
There's a yo-yo down here too? Makes more sense than a handgun at least. Might actually take this over my Flamarang.
Hey, another mysterious, out of place chest. Probably not getting any immediate answers about this either.
"Not a chance."
AH CRAP WALKED INTO ANOTHER SKELETON PARTY!
"HERE WE DON'T JUST PLAY THE XYLOPHONE! WE PLAY THE XYLOBONE!"
Are those all locked chests down there? Great...going to need to come back here with even more keys.
Alright, I'm back, I've collected a couple more keys, now I can see what's in here.
Muramasa? Doesn't look like the most useful sword out there, and it certainly won't be replacing this Beekeeper, but I have plans for this.
And in chest #2...
Another out of place handgun.
"WELCOME TO THE BONE ZONE, HUMAN!"
Deploying tactical bees.
And in the third chest up here...
A Blue Moon? I'll have to see if this is going to replace the Valor I found earlier.
Speaking of the Valor, here's another one.
I STEP AWAY FROM THIS SPOT FOR ONE MINUTE AND ALREADY ANOTHER SKELETON PARTY HAS STARTED!
"OUR PARTIES DO NOT STOP, HUMAN!"
If my map is right, that's the entire dungeon right there. Just a few more locked chests to look through and I'm done here.
This one just has a third shadow key...
This one just has another Muramasa...
This one just has another Aqua Scepter...
And this, if I'm not mistaken, is the last chest.
And this is...a Cobalt Shield? Never seen one of these before, but if it really does grant immunity to knockback, I have a feeling I'm going to like this thing. But anyways, that was the last chest, so I'm going to leave.
"So, Guide, the only things I thought I had left to do were get the Night's Edge and unlock this...hardmode thing, which I'm pretty sure just makes a few enemies harder and makes the corruption spread faster. So what's all this stuff that you've been talking about?"
"If that's all you think hardmode is, then you've barely even gotten half of the story. That's something for you to find out about later though. Now, let me tell you what you need to do next..."
Chapter 15: Edge of the Night
"So, the next thing I have to do is fight a powerful boss monster in the underworld, which I need to make a sacrifice to summon, and I can't escape from it or I'll DIE."
"Yep, good luck with that. You'll need it."
"Thanks for the support. Really."
There's a couple things I know I can do right now. First things first, apparently I can combine the cobalt shield I found last time with my old obsidian skull.
Eh...I this could stand to have a better reforge.
Perfect! Menacing, my favorite reforge.
"Good luck out there, friend. You'll be needing this soon, I hear."
Now that I have that out of the way, time for another thing. I kind of want to see if I can find a different vanity set, and the ninja set looks exactly like something I would like. If I can get it in blue, that is.
But first, looks like I just can't keep these salesmen away. I'll see what he has before kicking him out.
"Greetings, good sir! I have high quality goods from all around the world, all at affordable prices! Care to take a look?"
"All you have is trash. Get out of my house."
Ok, now I'm going to try getting that ninja outfit. HEY KING SLIME, CHECK OUT THIS SLIME CROWN!
"YOUR OVERCONFIDENCE SHALL BE YOUR DOWNFALL!"
"Yeah, whatever. Can I just have that ninja outfit you have there?"
"YOU'LL HAVE TO FIGHT ME FOR IT!"
That didn't turn out well. For him, that is. Don't know how I'm going to dye this though...maybe I should have thought this through better...
Or a dye trader could conveniently show up right when I need him. That works too.
Maybe I can finally find some use for all these weird plants I keep finding everywhere, too.
Long story short, he did trade me some dyes for all those rare plants, but blue dye doesn't work well on this ninja outfit. So never mind about that, this whole thing has just been a waste of time.
Not a complete waste of time though. I CAN NOW RIDE A GIANT GOLDEN BEE!
However, there's a reason this chapter has the name it does. Time to get started on that. Mined all the hellstone in the immediate area, so only one solution.
YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAH, SUCK IT LOGIC, I DO WHATEVER THE CRAP I WANT!
I appear to have wandered into a very rough neighborhood. One where everyone can shoot magic.
"Like a really ghetto Hogwarts."
Think this is about enough to make the last sword.
Ok, that was the last sword I needed. Now to take all these smaller swords and turn them into one really big swords.
*T H E L E G E N D A P P E A R S*
But wait, I can make it better.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
*About 1 day of praising Rnjesus later*
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo........
*cough*
"Are you done?"
"Yeah *cough*. I think I'm done. Ow my voice."
Done with getting the Night's Edge, so now I'll be looking down here for shadow chests to open. First, this voodoo demon is dangerously close to a lava pit.
Built a platform, killed him, and AAH BONE SERPENT!
As I was saying, built a platform, killed him, and got another one of these voodoo dolls from him.
"You still shouldn't use one of those. You don't want to know what will happen."
"Right..."
Ok so, I kind of fell in lava, almost got killed, and had to teleport back home and go to the nurse for emergency care.
"Are you sure you should be down there after that? Well, maybe you'll be fine. But, third degree burns take some time to heal..."
Point is, now I'm going to be making an easier way down there before I go back down in case something like that happens again, because I really don't want to keep making that long trip down there anyways. I needed to do this anyways.
COMMENCING CONSTRUCTION OF THE HELLEVATOR!
Going to be skipping over a lot of the digging. Not like much of interest is happening here. I'm just digging a 3 block wide tunnel, nothing else.
Hey remember this place from earlier? The place where I found it and decided to turn back because I didn't want to run into skeletons or medusas, but I ended up finding both anyways? Good times...wait what am I talking about, those weren't good times at all.
Down in lava territory again. Although this water has been pretty annoying so far, I'm probably going to be glad it's all here when I hit a lava pit.
And now the HELLEVATOR is almost complete. Just a little bit more digging, a bit of rope, maybe a landing platform below, and it'll be perfect.
Now I can finally go back to looking for shadow chests, like this one right here. I've known about this one since before the dungeon, so I'll start by looking in this one.
Oh look, a flower that shoots a bouncing balls of fire, unrelated to those which might be thrown by brothers who happen to also be plumbers! Good base damage on it, but the Water Bolt might be better. I can give it a try.
Another one, hopefully something that I can get better use out of.
Didn't particularly care for the magic missile, so I don't think I'll like this any more.
MASTERFUL Demon Scythe...maybe I will be replacing the Water Bolt after all.
So, what's in here?
Now this, this I could really use. Might replace my Valor with this Sunfury.
This is the last one I could find. Almost done here.
A Dark Lance? Looks kind of like my Night's Edge, but I don't think I'll be using this. I have a Sunfury.
Think I'll be taking a little bit to do some building. Only going to be building a house for the Dryad here though, so this shouldn't take too long. Next time I'll show off the finished build, then do a few more miscellaneous things.
Chapter 16: Miscellaneous Stuff III, Revengance!
IT'S FINISHED, JUST LIKE I SAID! Too bad the Dryad's too busy with...whatever that is she's doing...to comment right now.
"Azerath metryon zynthos..."
You know what, this could be better still.
There, added some fountains. Now that I'm done with building one more house, I have another couple things to do.
Going to be going down to the underworld to build a giant bridge in preparation for this boss the Guide told me about.
"So tell me, how is it that you've always known about things like the Night's Edge and hardmode, but you've never heard of stuff like this?"
"Well you see, I actually wanted to learn about this place before coming here, so I came here with some knowledge already. I got bored and didn't care about learning everything though."
"Oh. That explains a few things."
I just got down here and there was a random jellyfish. It had a glowing necklace on it. I won't even try making sense of that.
BUT WAIT, JUST ONE MORE THING! Remember that Demon Scythe I just got? It's a little too slow for me, so I'm going back to the Water Bolt.
Aaaaand just a quick reforge for good measure, if I'm going to be using this.
Magma Stone? Maybe not something I need right now, but I might have an idea about where it will be useful.
Think this will be the end of this side of the bridge. Now the other side is going to be much longer. And...take much longer.
Another travelling merchant showed up. Too bad I'm too busy to care.
THIS IS TAKING FOREVER.
NOT LIKE ALL THESE BATS AND DEMONS AND SLIMES HELP MAKE IT GO FASTER.
Meh. I'm sure everyone up there will be fine.
Oh boy. Another travelling merchant. I really hope he doesn't leave before I finish this and get back to the surface. Really.
Ok, this is what my map looks like right now. As you can see, this is a very long bridge. It took my at least 3 days to complete, but maybe that means it's long enough to support a long boss battle down here.
Great, he's still here.
"Good day, good day! I have rare building materials here, as well as..."
"WAIT, YOU ACTUALLY HAVE GOOD STUFF? I NEED AT LEAST ONE STACK OF THAT DYNASTY WOOD NOW!"
"Excellent choice, sir! I also have this crimson cloak if you're interested."
"Do I look like the kind of guy who likes red and grey clothing?"
Even though I just got through with one really tedious project, I have another one to do next. It involves the corruption and lots of bombs.
This corruption here is dangerously close to my stuff, and I don't want any corruption touching my stuff. I came up with one solution, and that's to go with the reverse Trump solution:
BUILD A TRENCH!
Oh. Too much purple ice here. I'll have to move my trench over a few blocks.
WHERE WERE THESE ICE SKATES EARLIER IN THE GAME WHEN I COULD HAVE USED THEM?
After bombing my way across the area just under the corruption, I found an ice blade, another thing that would have been useful if I found it much earlier.
Halfway there...
"WOOOOOOAH! LIVIN' ON A PRAYER!"
"..."
"What, just trying to liven the mood."
Well this is the last thing I expected to find down here.
Remember when I was afraid of these places? Glad I don't need to be anymore.
Looks like I'm out of the ice, which I think means that I'm almost at the other edge of the corruption.
Like I really need another cloud in a bottle.
And a regular wooden chest just above it, still nothing I want though.
ALMOST THERE.
ALMOST THERE.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
I'M DONE! I'M FINALLY DONE!
*A goblin army is approaching from the west!"
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-
YOU GUYS CHOSE THE WRONG TIME TO MESS WITH ME!
"Hang on guys, I think that's Stazen over there!"
"It is! That's Stazen!"
"Traitor!"
"YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME AWAY FROM MY ROCKET BOOTS, YOU CLODS!"
DIE! DIE! SUFFER! SUFFER! PERISH!
YOU CAN USE MAGIC? I CAN TOO!
WANT A BALL OF FIRE IN YOUR FACE? I HAVE THAT TOO!
"I hope these goblins at least have some money on them. I don't want to waste knives if I don't need to."
"And I've only got a limited number of these poison syringes..."
BEGONE! AWAY WITH YE! Hey is that a harpoon on the ground?
"That might be worth some money."
Now I only have one more thing to do:
FIND
AN
AGLET.
Seriously, I have all the things I need to make Lightning Boots, and even upgrade them to Flurry Boots. I have no reason to not try getting them.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
RNJESUS.
HAS ABANDONED ME.
THAT TOOK ME 10 DAYS. 10 DAYS OF DIGGING AT THE SURFACE FOR CHESTS.
AAAAAAA.
Ok...I need to take a while to rest, and maybe calm down a bit. I need to be prepared, because tomorrow...
You.
"Huh. I wonder what he meant by that."
Chapter 17: And the World Would Never Be the Same
TODAY'S THE DAY! Time to beat the last boss before hardmode:
THE WALL OF FLESH!
Ok maybe that name doesn't sound too epic...
Going to want to make some potions first.
First I'll need an imbuing station to make a flask of poison. I'm not sure if that actually does anything against the Wall, but it will at least do something against any other enemies that want to interfere with this fight.
Here's what I'm going down there with. Night's Edge, Bee's Knees, Water Bolt, Sunfury, and Minishark for my weapons, and regeneration, ironskin, magic power, thorns, swiftness, soup, and a flask of poison for my potions. Oh, and also water walking, obsidian skin, and gravity potions in case things go wrong.
"Hey what's that voodoo doll doing there? Wait you aren't..."
And with that, I'm out of here.
"WAIT, I THINK I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE PLANNING, AND IT'S A REALLY BAD IDEA!"
"You said I needed to make a sacrifice to summon this boss, right?"
"YEAH BUT I'M SURE THERE'S SOMEONE WHO'S BETTER FOR THIS! WHAT ABOUT THE MERCHANT? THE CLOTHIER? THE WITCH DOCTOR MAYBE, YOU DON'T NEED HIM!"
"YOU...YOU NEED ME! WHO ELSE IS GOING TO GUIDE YOU?"
"Clearly not you."
"Are you at least going to kill me painlessly?"
"I'm throwing this voodoo doll into lava."
"Ooooh that's going to be painful..."
"YOU'VE HAD THIS COMING SINCE DAY ONE, GUIDE!"
"Come on, we can work this out peacefully, can't we? Buddy? Pal? Friendo?"
Don't stop me now...
Don't stop me...cause' I'm HAVIN' A GOOD TIME, HAVIN' A GOOD TIME!
I'M A SHOOTING STAR LEAPING THROUGH THE SKYYYYYYYY LIKE A TIGER, DEFYING THE LAWS OF GRAVITYYYYYYYY!
I'M A RACING CAR, FLASHING BYYY LIKE LADY GODAIVA!
I'M GONNA GO, GO, GO, THERE'S NO STOPPIN' MEEEEEEEEEEE!
I'M BURNIN' THROUGH THE SKYYYYY, YEAH! 200 DEGREES THAT'S WHY THE CALL ME MR. FAREIGNHEEEEIGHT! I'M TRAVELIN' AT THE SPEED OF LIIIIIIIIGHT! I'M GONNA MAKE A SUPER SONIC MAN OUT OF YOOOOOOOUUUUUUUU!
DON'T STOP ME NOOOOOOOW I'M HAVIN' SUCH A GOOD TIME! I'M HAVIN' A BALL-
*Colin the Guide has arrived!*
Oh...all good things must come to an end I guess...
I think I may have overprepared for the Wall of Flesh a little bit. It's almost dead and I've hardly taken any damage.
Hey, that's the rope I came down on right there! You know what, I need to make this a bit more of a challenge, I'm finishing off the Wall of Flesh with my Night's Edge. I didn't spend all that time getting all the swords I needed for this for nothing.
ALMOST THERE JUST 415 HP TO GO!
YEAH, FINAL BOSS DEFEATED! Wait what was that about ancient spirits of light and dark? Did I do something wrong?
Is this bad?
This is really bad, isn't it?
Chapter 18: Yin and Yang, to the Extreme!
Alright, so I'll admit it...I have literally no idea what's going on here. I'll just see what the Wall of Flesh dropped and...take things from there?
Didn't even have anything useful. Just some fancy hammer called the Pwnhammer and a copyright safe buster sword. Neither of them even do good damage.
So...why is there suddenly a bunch of ebonstone down here? I remember only using a mix of regular stone, obsidian brick, and ash for this bridge.
WOOAH WHAT IS THAT THING KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT!
OK I'M NOT KILLING IT FAST ENOUGH, RETREAT!
Ok, nothing's changed up here, at least to what I can see.
"I wouldn't say that just yet. I can see some pretty big Eaters over in the corruption now. Bigger than the ones we're used to."
"Great, something must have happened with the corruption. Besides the fact that it spreads now, I mean."
My reverse Trump solution seems to be working...so far at least...
Giant purple slimes? Since when were there slimes here? I should really go back and see if the Guide knows what's going on here...
"Um...hi?"
"You...you...YOU...YOU...!"
"OK I'LL BE GOING THEN."
"One Life Man, I would not advise talking to him right now. He's not been well since he came wandering back here with third degree lava burns. If you need information on what has happened here, please come ask me instead."
WHY IS THERE A LIVING SET OF DEMONITE ARMOR HERE I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS PLACE ANYMORE!
"Alright, if you can tell me what's going on here, I really need to know."
"This may be a bit difficult to comprehend but...in the spirits of light and dark being released, the world has both been given back balance, and has been thrown off balance."
"I don't get it."
"Before, all you saw were places tainted by the extreme evil of this world. Now, there are other places tainted by the extreme good of this world. By re-introducing the extreme good, some balance has been restored, but now both extremes will be attempting to take over all pure parts of the world in a struggle to be the dominant force. Think of it like the concept of yin and yang, in that opposing forces are working to create balance, except in this case they do not coexist peacefully."
"I screwed up bad, didn't I?"
"They will not completely take over the world as long as you prevent them from doing so. I recommend you attempt to purify the world as much as possible, or at least isolate both of them so they cannot spread anymore."
"I'll see what I can do, I guess. This is all on me, after all."
"Since you cannot speak to the Guide right now and I can communicate with you anywhere you are through the powers of nature, I shall take his place, at least for the moment. The first thing you should do is destroy some demon alters in the corruption. I believe you just obtained a hammer that is capable of doing such a task."
I hope all of the Dryad's advice isn't that long winded...
So then, I just need to take this Pwnhammer and smash these?
*Your world has been blessed with Palladium!*
WOAH IS THAT SOME NEW KIND OF CRAZY POWERFUL ORE? CAN I GET MORE IF I KEEP SMASHING?
OOOOOH MYTHRIL! THAT'S THE STUFF THAT'S LIKE...AS STRONG AS STEEL BUT AS LIGHT AS FABRIC, RIGHT? I THOUGHT ONLY ELVES COULD GET THIS STUFF!
OH MY GOD TITANIUM! I THINK THAT STUFF IS STRONGER THAN STEEL BUT ONLY HALF THE WEIGHT OR SOMETHING!
The crap is this thing? Some kind of spook?
Turns out if I keep smashing alters, I can keep getting more rare stuff from them! Also I just discovered a green jellyfish. Only two types I've seen have been blue and pink.
There are too many spooks here, where are they all even coming from?
"I believe those are spirits being released from the demon alters you are destroying."
NOPE 2SPOOKY5ME I'M OUT OF HERE!
I think I'll be good with the number of alters I destroyed. Seems like that should have created plenty of rare ores all over the place.
I've never seen this before, so this must be one of the new things.
Palladium! This is palladium. I'm going to have a really hard time telling this apart from copper.
Great, more new types of slimes? And now they have faces.
"D'yah'd better believe it buddy! Me and my kind are free to wander these caves again!"
They talk too, it seems, which only makes me hate them more.
Nothing new in the marble biome. At least I know now that this world has some mercy left. There is an odd looking skeleton down there though.
"I AM NO ORDINARY SKELETON, HUMAN! I AM WARRIOR SKELETON! AT LONG LAST, THE SKELETON ARMY IS FREE TO PATROL THE UNDERGROUND ONCE AGAIN, AND WE SHALL NOT BE HINDERED BY PUNY HUMANS LIKE YOU!"
These new skeletons talk too much.
Purple water? Isn't that the kind of water I see in the corruption? What's it doing all the way down here?
That's ebonstone down there...Dryad, the crap is going on here?
"Oh, I failed to mention one important detail. There are now patches of light and dark that go all the way down from the surface to the underworld. You can find one on either side of the world."
"As if the job of purifying the world wasn't hard enough to do..."
A Soul of Night? Never seen something drop one of these before. Any idea what these are for?
"Think of those as the essence of the darkness itself. They are an important component in the crafting of many powerful items...some more safe than others."
The crap...? How did some random wizard guy end up down here?
"We should help him before anything else. Questions can wait."
"Zzzzzzzz. HUH? YOU WHAT? Oh. Thanks for saving me, friend! This bondage was starting to chafe."
"Right, so now that you're free, how did you-"
"WAIT HOLD ON, I KNOW WHO YOU ARE! Jotaro, right? Wait, no, you're Mugen! No..."
"Actually my name is-"
"I'VE GOT IT! You're that Saitama kid, aren't you?"
"No, I'm One Life Man. Never even knew a guy named Saitama."
"You can't fool ME, Saitama! You're a lot weaker than when I last saw you. You've been slacking off with your training, haven't you?"
("Hey, do we really need to keep this guy?")
("Of course we do! He appears to be a bit senile, but if you are a true hero than you should not turn him away just for that.")
("Fine.") "Hey, so since you're free now, how about settling down in a small village I built? I can show you the way if you want."
"Into community service now, are you? I still remember back when you would get into fights with completely random people with your psychic powers! I shouldn't need your guidance, I can find my own way."
"Suit yourself."
"I still don't think that was a good idea."
"But do you not feel like that was the right thing to do?"
"No. In fact I feel worse for having invited him into living in my village."
And that right there must be one of the really big Eaters the Nurse was talking about earlier. Along with one of the weird worm like things I saw earlier.
Well then, something tells me this is somehow connected to that ice chest I found back in the dungeon a while ago.
"That key will not work right now. You have a long road ahead of you before you can get to this point, but to make that key usable you must first defeat the master of the jungle, Plantera."
"Plantera? Sounds like some kind of band."
Chapter 19: New Equipment for a New World!
WELCOME BACK TO THE ADVENTURES OF ONE LIFE MAN, WHERE I AM FINDING OUT MY MINISHARK AND WATER BOLT ARE NOW USELESS, ESPECIALLY AGAINST THESE GIANT EATERS.
"Actually, those are known as corruptors."
SHE'S HERE TOO NOW.
This must be mythril right here. It looks a bit more green than I was expecting. I thought this was supposed to be some kind of really light and flexible kind of iron. It's taking a really long time to mine...
"You cannot mine mythril with your current equipment. I would recommend you craft a palladium pickaxe first."
"Oh. Is it safe to assume that it's the same case with titanium?"
"Indeed. You must have at least a mythril pickaxe to mine titanium."
Oh, hey, some palladium spawned in one of these old spider dens.
CRAP WE HAVE NEW SPIDERS HERE NOW!
SPIDERS! LEAVE!
AND IN THE ABSENCE OF SPIDERS, I NOW HAVE A PIG DRAGON THING CHASING ME!
"That is a pigron, for your information. Be mindful of them while you are in corrupted ice caves, they make themselves completely invincible and sneak up on you quite easily."
Invisible pig dragons. What will this world come up with next.
Good thing I got the absolute best melee weapons I could get a hold of before killing the Wall of Flesh. Even if my other weapons aren't useful anymore, these still are.
More pigrons. Must be a sign that I should leave.
I got a good bit of palladium in my first expedition into hardmode caves, so with any luck I can make at least a pickaxe.
"It is possible to make a drill too."
"DRILLS YOU SAY?"
MY DRILL IS THE DRILL THAT WILL PIERCE THE HEAVENS!
"Oh dear..."
"HUH? WUZZAT? HEY SAITAMA, IS YOUR FRIEND KAMINA HERE TOO OR SOMETHING?"
And less importantly, one piece of palladium armor. Now, I could go back down and finish getting palladium for the rest of this armor, and maybe get some mythril for a mythril drill, but instead I'm going to go see what this area of "extreme good" on the other side of the world looks like.
"That place is called the hallow. I believe you will know what it is when you see it."
If I had to take a guess, I'd say this is it right here. Rainbow trees, pixies, pastel colors everywhere...yep this is it. I don't get how this is a bad place though, it looks a lot better than the corruption.
"Did you not listen to what I had to say before? It does not matter which one is good and which one is bad, all that matters it achieving balance!"
"Well your explanations take too long."
Not too big of a fan of the pink water here, but otherwise seems like a pretty nice place.
That looks like the end of it. Also apparently there are living clouds now? It dropped some kind of...magic cloud wand or something. Looks like it's called a Nimbus Rod. Maybe I've found a good replacement magic weapon? Done what I came here to do though, so back to the mines for me.
This time I remembered to bring some spelunker potions. That should make it a lot easier to find hidden palladium and mythril.
Oh yeah, and that Nimbus Rod I just got? This is all the proof I need to see that I've found a good new magic weapon.
So, along with corruptors, clingers, and corrupt slimes, it would appear there are now miniature Eater of Worlds-like worms wandering around down here.
Hey, looks like there was a mushroom biome just underneath my base this whole time! The only ones I've seen until now have been in the jungle.
OW THERE ARE ANGRY THINGS LIVING IN MUSHROOM BIOMES NOW! RETREATING!
ECH, MY FACE IS ON FIRE! WHY WON'T THIS FIRE GO OUT!?
"That flame is a special kind that cannot be put out. Your only option is to wait for it to go out."
"I'M ON FIRE. IT BURNS."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Oh, hey, running around with my head on fire actually got me somewhere for once! That looks like stone from the hallow!
The things living here drop Souls of Light. I'm assuming those are basically the opposite of Souls of Night?
"Indeed. Equally as useful, and equally as dangerous."
"The crap is this?"
"I would not advise that you use that right now. That is used to summon two incredibly powerful monsters known as The Twins."
"I'll stay away from this for now."
Perfect. A lava filled marble biome. Just another reminder how much this world wants to kill me now.
"On the bright side, this way no hoplites or medusas will spawn here
!"
"There is still no bright side here."
Aw man...I was hoping for some kind of rare statue, not just one I can craft myself...
WOAH CRAP THAT IS A MIMIC! ALL I WANTED WAS TREASURE, INSTEAD I GOT THIS!
DIE MONSTER! YOU DON'T BELONG IN THIS WORLD!
I got a Philosopher's Stone from that, which I thought lets me do all kinds of crazy alchemy, but it looks like all the myths I heard were just lies. This one just reduces potion cooldown. I wonder if I could maybe combine this with my Band of Regeneration...
Ok, first just going to make a mythril drill...
AHA, looks like I can make something with a Band of Regeneration and a Philosopher's Stone!
"Did you say you found a Philosopher's Stone? I'd give my life's savings to get one of those! It would practically open up a new world of alchemy for me!"
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-
(Continued on page 4)
Chapter 12: Through the Fire and the BEES!
And now, after defeating King Slime, I have come to defeat the Queen Bee!
General strategy is to stay on my platform unless I need a buff from the honey and try to use ranged weapons. Could do this with my Blade of Grass, but ranged weapons like the Boomstick and Thorn Chakram make this easier.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!
SHOUT OUT TO MY BOI RNJESUS! YOU'RE THE GREATEST, BRO!
This. This right here. Is the definition of euphoria.
Oh and I also got a Beekeeper. Maybe I should replace my Blade of Grass with that.
"SHUT YOUR FACE, GUIDE!"
Course' if I really needed to I could have just teleported out, so I was never in any real danger.
"I'm sure that's what you were thinking a minute ago."
Got a Bee's Knees off of that so...guess I don't really need to get a Minishark anymore? Might still get one, but as someone who isn't going to be a ranger, this might be a better option. I have all I really wanted to get from the Queen Bees, including the extra Honeyed Goggles that I wasn't expecting to get.
So, I've been thinking, and I know what I want to do next. Last time I was underground I stopped at the underworld, but I should be able to handle myself down there now, so that's where I'm going next.
"I'll be waiting here if you need treatment for lava burns."
"Bring back something worth some good money, will yeh?"
"WELCOME TO THE UNDERWORLD, HOME OF THE UNDERWORLD, CAN I TAKE YOUR ORDER?"
The stone here I've heard is perfect for making tools and armor. Don't feel like jumping into lava to get it, so I'm just going to mine in safety from these house...tower...things.
"ONE LIFE MAN, WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T LET THAT THING DROP WHAT IT'S HOLDING INTO THE LAVA."
"Actually, I know exactly what that thing it's holding is. That's a voodoo doll of you, isn't it?"
"NO, REALLY, TRUST ME ON THIS ONE, YOU DO NOT WANT TO KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN IT GETS THROWN IN LAVA."
"There's a 50/50 chance you're lying on that one just to get out of getting burned by lava. In case you're not lying though, I'll just leave this voodoo demon alone and nothing will fall in the lava. I need to go back up to get an obsidian skull anyways."
This happened again on the way back down.
This locked chest here looks suspicious. Too bad I haven't found a key for something like this yet.
"Hey Guide, anywhere I can find a key for this chest?"
"You'll find one soon, hopefully."
"Some help you've been."
Back from mining, and I have a good number of hellstone ingots now. Remember that Enchanted Boomerang I found a while ago? This is what I wanted to do with it.
"Have you seen that old man walking around the dungeon? He doesn't look well at all..."
"Actually, I have seen him. He's creepy and weird looking."
"Maybe that should be your next stop."
"Hey old man, got some people back home who are seriously creeped out by you, myself included. What's your problem?"
"My master cannot be summoned under the light of day."
"Oh so now I have to wait all day for you to be ready? This had better be worth it."
HARDCORE PARKOUR! I can't really do parkour if I'm flying...
"Come back at night if you wish to enter."
"SURE LOOKS LIKE NIGHT TO ME, CAN YOU JUST GET ON WITH WHATEVER THIS IS?"
"My master cannot be summoned under the light of day."
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
"Stranger, do you possess the strength to defeat my master?"
"What? Is this some kind of rhetorical question?"
"Please! Battle my captor and free me! I beg you!"
"FER YER INFORMATION, THAT'S SKELETRON!"
Oh no. A slowly spinning skull. Whatever will I do.
"THIS 'ERE IS MY MOST POWERFUL ATTACK! DON'T YEH UNDERESTIMATE IT!"
"That old man was way over hyping you, you know. A REAL challenge would have been fighting those dungeon guardians you keep downstairs."
"YEH REALLY WANT TEH FIGHT ONE A' THOSE? I'M NOT STOPPIN' YEH IF YEH WANT TO, BUT I THINK YEH'D BE...
BONED!"
"I think the internet has had enough pun making skeletons for one year, don't you?"
"Actually you really just need to take down the head."
"Well I'm probably going to take down his other hand anyways. If I can find some way to artificially extend this chapter a bit more, I will."
"Hey, we're supposed to stay quiet about that tactic."
Oh, and there goes the other hand anyways. Never mind, can't use that to extend the chapter. What's this guy made of anyways, something weak like paper mache?
"PURE BONES! I JUST NEEDED TEH TAKE SOME CALCIUM PILLS!"
THIS IS IT, I'M ABOUT TO WIN!
"Or so you think."
"There's something big you're not telling me about, isn't there?"
If I really want to know, that is.
"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH WE ARE GOING TO RATTLE YOUR BONES!"
"..."
"This isn't what it looks like."
"Whatever you say."
"One Life Man I suddenly feel very uncomfortable about this place."
"No, really, the only reason why I was tied up was because a few days ago I was hired by that old man to install some lights in here or something. As soon as I got here, he tied me up and threw me down here. Don't know why, but if that makes you feel less uncomfortable, now you know why I'm here."
"I'll take your word for it."
"Before I get going, I think I lost one of my contacts down here."
Wait, who's this a voodoo doll of? Kind of looks like that old man, but...I don't think he's a clothier. Is he? Meh, not much use anyways, he exploded into a giant skeleton.
"From what I understand, this place used to be owned by a mage guild. They used to do all kinds of research on magic, alchemy, and summoning down here. It's been abandoned for quite some time though. Either someone went a bit too crazy with necromancy in here, or these skeletons are supposed to be guarding the knowledge they left behind."
"Hm. If this place was owned by mages that must explain why-"
"Why everything here is too complex for you?"
"Well you don't have to put it so plainly."
OW MY EVERYTHING. LONG STORY SHORT, A SKELETON PARTY WAS DOWN THAT PIT. AND SPIKES. AND A DART TRAP.
"NURSE PLEASE HELP I AM IN NEED OF YOUR SERVICES."
"Normally I would ask you where it hurts, but...here I think it would be better to rule out what doesn't hurt."
"You know I have some special ammo for sale just for nights like these."
"Really?"
"Silver bullets? These are zombies we're dealing with here, not werewolves."
"Shows how well you know your guns and ammo. These silver bullets aren't just for killing werewolves, they're also much more powerful than regular bullets. They make especially good Minishark ammo."
"Really? Give me as many as you've got."
Several hours of killing later, the blood moon has passed. Should be safe to start building again.
Why.
"HAVE I FINALLY KILLED ENOUGH SLIMES FOR YOU?"
"FOOL! You may have gotten lucky last time, but NOT THIS TIME!"
"AUGH!"
"NOW LET ME WORK IN PEACE."
Didn't even drop anything interesting.
"EVIL!"
"FIRST THE MERCHANT, NOW YOU!"
Screw this place, I'm going back to the dungeon.
So that pit I fell down last time? This is it. Like I said, dart trap and spikes. There were a couple skeletons here too, but I took care of them.
Got a golden key off of one of these skeletons and used it to unlock this chest. Too bad all that was in it was another shadow key.
"Hey, did you even show when you got the first shadow key?"
"Crap I don't think I did. Ok, it went something like this:"
"WOOOOOW A GOLDEN KEY CAN UNLOCK A GOLDEN CHEST! AND INSIDE THE CHEST WAS ANOTHER KEY!"
"GOD ONE LIFE MAN WHY ARE YOU SUCH A SCRUB GIT GUD!"
*ANGRY AT GUIDE NOISES*
"That...is something you don't need to worry about right now."
"Great. More secret stuff for later."
WOAH WHAT DID I JUST RUN INTO!?
"WELCOME TO OUR SKELETON PARTY HUMAN! ONLY SKELETONS ARE INVITED!"
"THIS is why I'm glad to have a water bolt."
What...what are those crabs doing down here? Like, how are they even here?
"Some statues can spawn enemies if they're powered with wire. The crab statue over there must be hooked up to a pressure plate."
"That would have been a nice thing to know before."
"Exactly what it looks like. A voodoo table."
"SKELETON GLITTER!"
"HELLO, TELEPORTING GLITTERY SKELETONS!"
"Makes about as much sense as there being a musket inside one of those party balls of doom back in the corruption."
"That was actually inside the shadow orb? I thought the shadow orbs just...I don't know...summoned random objects from other places."
I guess not all chests down here are locked. Only the gold chests with good stuff in them are.
Magic Missile? Sounds cool, so I'll give it a try.
"Not a chance."
"HERE WE DON'T JUST PLAY THE XYLOPHONE! WE PLAY THE XYLOBONE!"
Are those all locked chests down there? Great...going to need to come back here with even more keys.
Muramasa? Doesn't look like the most useful sword out there, and it certainly won't be replacing this Beekeeper, but I have plans for this.
Another out of place handgun.
Deploying tactical bees.
A Blue Moon? I'll have to see if this is going to replace the Valor I found earlier.
"OUR PARTIES DO NOT STOP, HUMAN!"
"If that's all you think hardmode is, then you've barely even gotten half of the story. That's something for you to find out about later though. Now, let me tell you what you need to do next..."
"Yep, good luck with that. You'll need it."
"Thanks for the support. Really."
Eh...I this could stand to have a better reforge.
"Good luck out there, friend. You'll be needing this soon, I hear."
Now that I have that out of the way, time for another thing. I kind of want to see if I can find a different vanity set, and the ninja set looks exactly like something I would like. If I can get it in blue, that is.
"All you have is trash. Get out of my house."
Ok, now I'm going to try getting that ninja outfit. HEY KING SLIME, CHECK OUT THIS SLIME CROWN!
"Yeah, whatever. Can I just have that ninja outfit you have there?"
"YOU'LL HAVE TO FIGHT ME FOR IT!"
However, there's a reason this chapter has the name it does. Time to get started on that. Mined all the hellstone in the immediate area, so only one solution.
YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAH, SUCK IT LOGIC, I DO WHATEVER THE CRAP I WANT!
"Like a really ghetto Hogwarts."
But wait, I can make it better.
*About 1 day of praising Rnjesus later*
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo........
*cough*
"Are you done?"
"Yeah *cough*. I think I'm done. Ow my voice."
As I was saying, built a platform, killed him, and got another one of these voodoo dolls from him.
"You still shouldn't use one of those. You don't want to know what will happen."
"Right..."
Ok so, I kind of fell in lava, almost got killed, and had to teleport back home and go to the nurse for emergency care.
"Are you sure you should be down there after that? Well, maybe you'll be fine. But, third degree burns take some time to heal..."
Point is, now I'm going to be making an easier way down there before I go back down in case something like that happens again, because I really don't want to keep making that long trip down there anyways. I needed to do this anyways.
COMMENCING CONSTRUCTION OF THE HELLEVATOR!
Going to be skipping over a lot of the digging. Not like much of interest is happening here. I'm just digging a 3 block wide tunnel, nothing else.
Another one, hopefully something that I can get better use out of.
Didn't particularly care for the magic missile, so I don't think I'll like this any more.
Think I'll be taking a little bit to do some building. Only going to be building a house for the Dryad here though, so this shouldn't take too long. Next time I'll show off the finished build, then do a few more miscellaneous things.
"Azerath metryon zynthos..."
You know what, this could be better still.
"So tell me, how is it that you've always known about things like the Night's Edge and hardmode, but you've never heard of stuff like this?"
"Well you see, I actually wanted to learn about this place before coming here, so I came here with some knowledge already. I got bored and didn't care about learning everything though."
"Oh. That explains a few things."
Think this will be the end of this side of the bridge. Now the other side is going to be much longer. And...take much longer.
Another travelling merchant showed up. Too bad I'm too busy to care.
NOT LIKE ALL THESE BATS AND DEMONS AND SLIMES HELP MAKE IT GO FASTER.
"Good day, good day! I have rare building materials here, as well as..."
"WAIT, YOU ACTUALLY HAVE GOOD STUFF? I NEED AT LEAST ONE STACK OF THAT DYNASTY WOOD NOW!"
"Excellent choice, sir! I also have this crimson cloak if you're interested."
"Do I look like the kind of guy who likes red and grey clothing?"
BUILD A TRENCH!
WHERE WERE THESE ICE SKATES EARLIER IN THE GAME WHEN I COULD HAVE USED THEM?
After bombing my way across the area just under the corruption, I found an ice blade, another thing that would have been useful if I found it much earlier.
Halfway there...
"WOOOOOOAH! LIVIN' ON A PRAYER!"
"..."
"What, just trying to liven the mood."
ALMOST THERE.
ALMOST THERE.
I'M DONE! I'M FINALLY DONE!
*A goblin army is approaching from the west!"
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-
"Hang on guys, I think that's Stazen over there!"
"It is! That's Stazen!"
"Traitor!"
"YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME AWAY FROM MY ROCKET BOOTS, YOU CLODS!"
"I hope these goblins at least have some money on them. I don't want to waste knives if I don't need to."
"And I've only got a limited number of these poison syringes..."
"That might be worth some money."
FIND
AN
AGLET.
Seriously, I have all the things I need to make Lightning Boots, and even upgrade them to Flurry Boots. I have no reason to not try getting them.
RNJESUS.
HAS ABANDONED ME.
THAT TOOK ME 10 DAYS. 10 DAYS OF DIGGING AT THE SURFACE FOR CHESTS.
AAAAAAA.
Ok...I need to take a while to rest, and maybe calm down a bit. I need to be prepared, because tomorrow...
You.
"Huh. I wonder what he meant by that."
TODAY'S THE DAY! Time to beat the last boss before hardmode:
THE WALL OF FLESH!
Ok maybe that name doesn't sound too epic...
Going to want to make some potions first.
Here's what I'm going down there with. Night's Edge, Bee's Knees, Water Bolt, Sunfury, and Minishark for my weapons, and regeneration, ironskin, magic power, thorns, swiftness, soup, and a flask of poison for my potions. Oh, and also water walking, obsidian skin, and gravity potions in case things go wrong.
"Hey what's that voodoo doll doing there? Wait you aren't..."
And with that, I'm out of here.
"You said I needed to make a sacrifice to summon this boss, right?"
"YEAH BUT I'M SURE THERE'S SOMEONE WHO'S BETTER FOR THIS! WHAT ABOUT THE MERCHANT? THE CLOTHIER? THE WITCH DOCTOR MAYBE, YOU DON'T NEED HIM!"
"Clearly not you."
"I'm throwing this voodoo doll into lava."
"Ooooh that's going to be painful..."
"YOU'VE HAD THIS COMING SINCE DAY ONE, GUIDE!"
Don't stop me now...
I'M A RACING CAR, FLASHING BYYY LIKE LADY GODAIVA!
I'M BURNIN' THROUGH THE SKYYYYY, YEAH! 200 DEGREES THAT'S WHY THE CALL ME MR. FAREIGNHEEEEIGHT! I'M TRAVELIN' AT THE SPEED OF LIIIIIIIIGHT! I'M GONNA MAKE A SUPER SONIC MAN OUT OF YOOOOOOOUUUUUUUU!
*Colin the Guide has arrived!*
Oh...all good things must come to an end I guess...
I think I may have overprepared for the Wall of Flesh a little bit. It's almost dead and I've hardly taken any damage.
Hey, that's the rope I came down on right there! You know what, I need to make this a bit more of a challenge, I'm finishing off the Wall of Flesh with my Night's Edge. I didn't spend all that time getting all the swords I needed for this for nothing.
YEAH, FINAL BOSS DEFEATED! Wait what was that about ancient spirits of light and dark? Did I do something wrong?
Is this bad?
This is really bad, isn't it?
OK I'M NOT KILLING IT FAST ENOUGH, RETREAT!
Ok, nothing's changed up here, at least to what I can see.
"I wouldn't say that just yet. I can see some pretty big Eaters over in the corruption now. Bigger than the ones we're used to."
"Great, something must have happened with the corruption. Besides the fact that it spreads now, I mean."
"You...you...YOU...YOU...!"
"OK I'LL BE GOING THEN."
"One Life Man, I would not advise talking to him right now. He's not been well since he came wandering back here with third degree lava burns. If you need information on what has happened here, please come ask me instead."
WHY IS THERE A LIVING SET OF DEMONITE ARMOR HERE I DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS PLACE ANYMORE!
"This may be a bit difficult to comprehend but...in the spirits of light and dark being released, the world has both been given back balance, and has been thrown off balance."
"I don't get it."
"Before, all you saw were places tainted by the extreme evil of this world. Now, there are other places tainted by the extreme good of this world. By re-introducing the extreme good, some balance has been restored, but now both extremes will be attempting to take over all pure parts of the world in a struggle to be the dominant force. Think of it like the concept of yin and yang, in that opposing forces are working to create balance, except in this case they do not coexist peacefully."
"I screwed up bad, didn't I?"
"They will not completely take over the world as long as you prevent them from doing so. I recommend you attempt to purify the world as much as possible, or at least isolate both of them so they cannot spread anymore."
"I'll see what I can do, I guess. This is all on me, after all."
"Since you cannot speak to the Guide right now and I can communicate with you anywhere you are through the powers of nature, I shall take his place, at least for the moment. The first thing you should do is destroy some demon alters in the corruption. I believe you just obtained a hammer that is capable of doing such a task."
So then, I just need to take this Pwnhammer and smash these?
*Your world has been blessed with Palladium!*
WOAH IS THAT SOME NEW KIND OF CRAZY POWERFUL ORE? CAN I GET MORE IF I KEEP SMASHING?
Turns out if I keep smashing alters, I can keep getting more rare stuff from them! Also I just discovered a green jellyfish. Only two types I've seen have been blue and pink.
"I believe those are spirits being released from the demon alters you are destroying."
I've never seen this before, so this must be one of the new things.
"D'yah'd better believe it buddy! Me and my kind are free to wander these caves again!"
They talk too, it seems, which only makes me hate them more.
"I AM NO ORDINARY SKELETON, HUMAN! I AM WARRIOR SKELETON! AT LONG LAST, THE SKELETON ARMY IS FREE TO PATROL THE UNDERGROUND ONCE AGAIN, AND WE SHALL NOT BE HINDERED BY PUNY HUMANS LIKE YOU!"
These new skeletons talk too much.
Purple water? Isn't that the kind of water I see in the corruption? What's it doing all the way down here?
That's ebonstone down there...Dryad, the crap is going on here?
"Oh, I failed to mention one important detail. There are now patches of light and dark that go all the way down from the surface to the underworld. You can find one on either side of the world."
"As if the job of purifying the world wasn't hard enough to do..."
"Think of those as the essence of the darkness itself. They are an important component in the crafting of many powerful items...some more safe than others."
"We should help him before anything else. Questions can wait."
"Right, so now that you're free, how did you-"
"WAIT HOLD ON, I KNOW WHO YOU ARE! Jotaro, right? Wait, no, you're Mugen! No..."
"Actually my name is-"
"I'VE GOT IT! You're that Saitama kid, aren't you?"
"No, I'm One Life Man. Never even knew a guy named Saitama."
"You can't fool ME, Saitama! You're a lot weaker than when I last saw you. You've been slacking off with your training, haven't you?"
("Hey, do we really need to keep this guy?")
("Of course we do! He appears to be a bit senile, but if you are a true hero than you should not turn him away just for that.")
("Fine.") "Hey, so since you're free now, how about settling down in a small village I built? I can show you the way if you want."
"Into community service now, are you? I still remember back when you would get into fights with completely random people with your psychic powers! I shouldn't need your guidance, I can find my own way."
"Suit yourself."
"But do you not feel like that was the right thing to do?"
"No. In fact I feel worse for having invited him into living in my village."
Well then, something tells me this is somehow connected to that ice chest I found back in the dungeon a while ago.
"That key will not work right now. You have a long road ahead of you before you can get to this point, but to make that key usable you must first defeat the master of the jungle, Plantera."
"Plantera? Sounds like some kind of band."
WELCOME BACK TO THE ADVENTURES OF ONE LIFE MAN, WHERE I AM FINDING OUT MY MINISHARK AND WATER BOLT ARE NOW USELESS, ESPECIALLY AGAINST THESE GIANT EATERS.
"Actually, those are known as corruptors."
SHE'S HERE TOO NOW.
This must be mythril right here. It looks a bit more green than I was expecting. I thought this was supposed to be some kind of really light and flexible kind of iron. It's taking a really long time to mine...
"You cannot mine mythril with your current equipment. I would recommend you craft a palladium pickaxe first."
"Oh. Is it safe to assume that it's the same case with titanium?"
"Indeed. You must have at least a mythril pickaxe to mine titanium."
Oh, hey, some palladium spawned in one of these old spider dens.
CRAP WE HAVE NEW SPIDERS HERE NOW!
SPIDERS! LEAVE!
AND IN THE ABSENCE OF SPIDERS, I NOW HAVE A PIG DRAGON THING CHASING ME!
"That is a pigron, for your information. Be mindful of them while you are in corrupted ice caves, they make themselves completely invincible and sneak up on you quite easily."
Invisible pig dragons. What will this world come up with next.
Good thing I got the absolute best melee weapons I could get a hold of before killing the Wall of Flesh. Even if my other weapons aren't useful anymore, these still are.
"It is possible to make a drill too."
"DRILLS YOU SAY?"
"Oh dear..."
"HUH? WUZZAT? HEY SAITAMA, IS YOUR FRIEND KAMINA HERE TOO OR SOMETHING?"
And less importantly, one piece of palladium armor. Now, I could go back down and finish getting palladium for the rest of this armor, and maybe get some mythril for a mythril drill, but instead I'm going to go see what this area of "extreme good" on the other side of the world looks like.
"That place is called the hallow. I believe you will know what it is when you see it."
"Did you not listen to what I had to say before? It does not matter which one is good and which one is bad, all that matters it achieving balance!"
"Well your explanations take too long."
This time I remembered to bring some spelunker potions. That should make it a lot easier to find hidden palladium and mythril.
Oh yeah, and that Nimbus Rod I just got? This is all the proof I need to see that I've found a good new magic weapon.
"That flame is a special kind that cannot be put out. Your only option is to wait for it to go out."
"I'M ON FIRE. IT BURNS."
The things living here drop Souls of Light. I'm assuming those are basically the opposite of Souls of Night?
"Indeed. Equally as useful, and equally as dangerous."
"The crap is this?"
"I would not advise that you use that right now. That is used to summon two incredibly powerful monsters known as The Twins."
"I'll stay away from this for now."
"On the bright side, this way no hoplites or medusas will spawn here
!""There is still no bright side here."
"Did you say you found a Philosopher's Stone? I'd give my life's savings to get one of those! It would practically open up a new world of alchemy for me!"
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-
(Continued on page 4)
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thegamer381
Terrarian
Word to the wise for next time, reserve a couple of posts after the original post in case that happens again, I do that sometimes on other forums and it works fine.
thegamer381
Terrarian
OP, why don't you put the rest of this on the first part of page 4? Then it will be slightly more organized.
Greenie
Retinazer
I already have a couple of chapters posted on page 3, and I would prefer to just keep posting there instead of having a couple chapters on one post and then put the rest on another post on page 4. It's still fairly obvious which post has the chapters on it, so I don't think it's too much of a problem anyways.
Side note though, chapter 14 is now up! Had to change the Mechanic's text color in the previous chapter too, since it turns out I already used light orange for the Arms Dealer.
thegamer381
Terrarian
The "xylobone"...
Haha, for once one of those puns was actually funny.
Haha, for once one of those puns was actually funny.
Greenie
Retinazer
Chapter 15: Edge of the Night! That title isn't really subtle at all, is it?
Also, this thread now has over 1000 views! I'll be honest, when I started this whole thing, I really expected that it wouldn't get too much attention I would need to keep bumping it just to keep it alive. It's way more than just a pleasant surprise to see that people actually like this little screenshot let's play thing that I'm doing and want to see more of it. Thanks to everyone who's been reading this, and look forward to seeing more in the future!
Also, this thread now has over 1000 views! I'll be honest, when I started this whole thing, I really expected that it wouldn't get too much attention I would need to keep bumping it just to keep it alive. It's way more than just a pleasant surprise to see that people actually like this little screenshot let's play thing that I'm doing and want to see more of it. Thanks to everyone who's been reading this, and look forward to seeing more in the future!
knuxfanwin8
Eye of Cthulhu
Wow! I guess you trained hard to survive. 
thegamer381
Terrarian
Well, its funny and cool. Plus, hardcore playthroughs are the most fun and risky. Now that i FINALLY have the console edition, i might play on hardcore soon.
HeroGabe
Golem
Well, nice! Sorry about the whole plan of keeping it on one page being torn apart, maybe you should've reserved posts, like an art thread? The problem with THAT, though, is that it is, more or less, unpredictable how long this would go, so it's EASY to make a mistake on how many posts you reserve.