A Prehistoric Lawn Mowing Service

Grox The Great 🌳


Introducing the latest in lawn care technology - Slasher’s Velociraptor can cut through grass as quickly as it can devour hapless victims on deserted islands. Includes bonus Pterodactyllical Delivery System! Get yours today!
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I have been a loyal customer of CleverGirl Technologies™ for years now and I have to say this newest product of theirs blows the competition right out of the water. Not only do they mow the lawn 43.36% more efficiently than any comparable generic brand reptiloid, their enhanced intelligence means they can be employed for a multitude of tasks. I have them doing my taxes, parallel parking, and even sending passive aggressive emails to my internet service provider on my behalf! Meanwhile, dinosaur-induced disembowelments in my neighborhood have dropped to an all time low! A must have for any hard-working person who finds themselves with too little time for domestic tasks and has a comprehensive liability insurance!

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