Defend Yourself!

[Deadbre12]

Hah, but that's where you're wrong! I am guilty! But wait...

I accuse NP of denying that they are denying that they are not guilty of this accusation.

 

[goblin 53]

I am not denying that I am denying, making me in denial and so denying that I am not denying. I am so not guilty of this due to this being a double negative and so if I don't deny of denying the denying then I am not guilty.

I accuse NP of actually trying to kill me with a chainsaw while jumping through a ring of fire in a circus while I am enjoying my day off as The Best and The One True God jobs.

 

[Catman8274]

By denying, it only confirms the accusation. By confirming, it implies that I denied it. By doing neither, which I'm doing, the accusation goes away entirely. Therefore, your argument is invalid.

I accuse the NP of not being able to laugh.

 

[goblin 53]

I can do evil laughs of -I'm totally going to take over the world now, but first hear all of this exposition so you still have time to take down my plans because I am totally getting bored from winning-
Your argument is invalid.

I accuse NP of not accepting me as the capt'n now.

 

[Catman8274]

We interrupt this monologue to bring you this! *throws a boulder at you*

I accuse the NP of monologuing during a point in which they should be killing you.

 

[Deadbre12]

I don't kill things. Except for rats. Rats are the worst.

I accuse NP of monologuing while petting a cat.

 

[Catman8274]

Something a lot of villains say to me: "You sly sunuva ! You caught me monologuing!" This is because I am a known monologue-interrupter! If there's a monologue, I'm usually the one to interrupt it! Just ask Papyrus! That's the one mistake he keeps making when fighting me: he starts monologuing!

I accuse the NP monologuing during a fight.

 

[Deadbre12]

Okay, I admit that I have a bit of an ego, but not enough to monologue while fighting. I'm no anime character.

I accuse NP of monologuing while there's no one listening.

 

[Ivyss]

There's always someone there... always.

I accuse NP of following someone all the time, watching them.

 

[Catman8274]

They were a suspected threat to the timeline.

I accuse the NP of monologuing during dinner.

 

[Deadbre12]

I'm too much of a messy eater without monologuing.

I accuse NP of always monologuing.

 

[goblin 53]

It's not monologuing if it is I, Cato Sicarius, do it. It is just that I, Cato Sicarius, spread my light by telling everyone what I have done, will do, am doing and how those work in detail over time.

I accuse NP of not knowing who the ultrasmurf Cato Sicarius is.

 

[Deadbre12]

Psh, I obviously know who that is! who is that?

I accuse NP of dying for no reason.

 

[goblin 53]

I have not died yet and so it wasn't for no reason yet.

I accuse NP of trying to sell me a hairy sandwhich while having some random monologue about the stormcloak rebellion.

 

[Deadbre12]

I don't sell things. I'm a dog.

I accuse NP of complaining about politics 24/7.

 

[goblin 53]

Not even following everything in politics, and so I can't find anything to complain about.

I accuse NP of having sudden bursts of propaganda deliveries from Russia.

 

[Deadbre12]

Well... my philosophies are "Down with the red flag!"

I accuse NP of assassinating the entire CIA and all connected persons, including Alexa.

 

[Catman8274]

Just because I'm a marksman doesn't automatically make me an assassin.

I accuse the NP of monologuing even after they've died.

 

[Deadbre12]

But I can't even die because plot armor, so your argument is invalid.

I accuse NP of being forced to live forever as a shell of their former self.

 

[Catman8274]

You have confused me for Asriel.

The NP was supposed to make post before me in the form of a monologue.