Weird solutions to ordinary problems!

[♥Astolfo♥]

Build an anarchic government.

The toaster isn't working.

 

[deletedaccount12]

Breathe on the toast until it might eventually cook.

I can't breathe.

 

[XtroyX0r]

Eat an oxygen tank.

I got stuck on the Watcher Knight boss from Hollow Knight.

 

[deletedaccount12]

Buy a watch and mutilate it in front of him, intimidating him into dying by himself.

I am unsuccessful at trying to catfish pedophiles.

 

[♥Astolfo♥]

manipulate time, become 6, try again

I keep saying the same things over and over.

 

[YourCatgirlCareProvider]

Drink 12 wax shots under a minute

dying internally

 

[Ivyss]

Die externally as well.

I'm tired

 

[♥Astolfo♥]

play awaken

there are aztec vampire strippers outside my door

 

[Ivyss]

Eat a single slice of pizza with a single clove of garlic on it at 3:42(AM) on monday the 5th of february in an abandoned warehouse exactly 500 cubic meters in volume in Kano.

That's an extremely specific solution.

 

[deletedaccount12]

Don't solve the problem because it's too specific.

I am a freak of nature.

 

[Streyll]

Make nature more freaky, then you'll fit in.


I have a PDF of a MIPS32 quick reference guide.

 

[Ivyss]

Make it a slow reference guide instead.

I've been having this same headache for over a week now.

 

[Streyll]

Remove your head. You can't have a headache without a head.

Timezones exist.

 

[Tibithia Σ]

Go back in time and kill Sandford Fleming, relieving the National Canada Railway of an engineer, and preventing time zones from existing.

I don't have a poutine.

 

[Ivyss]

Go to Russia.

I'm constantly in pain.

 

[Tibithia Σ]

Go to Russia.

I'm sick of Russia.

 

[Vella]

Go to Belarus.

I can't seem to stop loophole abusing.

 

[Tibithia Σ]

Go to therapy.

I can't afford to go to Belarus.

 

[Pigman Δ]

Steal from a Belarus bank.
I am bad at spriting.

 

[Tibithia Σ]

Go to a grammar school, shove their books into your brain area, and get better grammar.
I am not a dragon.