Absorb The Non-Issue

[Ivyss]

I point out that's not how physics or thermodynamics or whatever works. You freeze me and shatter me with a flamethrower as proof for your point.

I get frozen and then shattered.

 

[SaltyDog]

Pieces of you fly at me and one goes straight through my neck.

I was slain by piece of Chir'.

 

[Streyll]

The piece of Chir' then goes through you and then goes through my neck, killing me.

I turn on a water fountain.

 

[SaltyDog]

The water fountain overflows onto me and freezes, freezing me solid again.

The room is full of ice now.

 

[Flask & Vella the Latias]

The piece of Chir' slide from frozen water fountain and hit my leg, causing me to fall into frozen water fountain, impaling me, and making a dead pegasus blood fountain.

I probably stained the ice with my blood.

 

[SaltyDog]

Which causes the ice to melt onto me, which it then refreezes.

I'm frozen solid once again.

 

[Flask & Vella the Latias]

I'm tired of ice, so I try to thaw you, only for earthquake to destroy the house, burying me under rubble and killing me.

I get killed and buried by earthquake.

 

[SaltyDog]

You then become a zombie and kill everybody.

I've become zombified.

 

[Flask & Vella the Latias]

A Francis kills me in a Francispocalypse.

I get killed by a hater guy.

 

[SaltyDog]

He threw you off a cliff, onto a button that when pressed blows up the entire universe.

The universe just exploded.

 

[Flask & Vella the Latias]

I attempted to kill Francis only for <ERROR - UNIVERSE MISSING>

<LOAD LAST SAVE?>
> Y
> N

<You are dead due to Chir' dead body. You are overwhelmed. Respawn?>
> Y
> N

I attempt to see what caused a backup to kill me with Chir'.

 

[SaltyDog]

It happens the reason that is your most recent backup is because it was the last time you weren't dead. So, when you come back to life, you create a paradox that kills me.

I was slain by paradox.

 

[Flask & Vella the Latias]

I get deleted by world auto-repair machine.

I brew some spirits in Frackin' Universe.

 

[SaltyDog]

One of the spirits happened to be mine, killing me very brutally.

I'm melted from the inside, out.

 

[Streyll]

I watch your body melt, then kill myself because I can't deal with the memory of watching you melt.

I throw an avali TF potion at someone.

 

[Flask & Vella the Latias]

I get hit, turn, and explode, killing me.

I get killed by Dragonwolf throwing an avali TF potion at me.

 

[SaltyDog]

Pieces of you fly at me, and one flies through my head.

My face was impaled by piece of Changing Flask.

 

[Flask & Vella the Latias]

Then you murder me for murdering you even though it was caused by my dead body.

I get murdered by a glitching Lunatic Cultist.

 

[SaltyDog]

You start glitching, and delete me by accident.

<Name> was deleted.

 

[Streyll]

Because you didn't specify a name, you delete me by accident.

I drink an avali TF potion.