Bad Translator

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Original text:

"That Spy is an Engineer!"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"This is the Scout master."

Damn Scouts.
 
Original text:

""Y'all might be flame :red:ant, but ya sure ain't bulletproof.""

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Repair fire alarm systems,Ah,you know what I'm doing."
 
Original text:

"Oh, cuddles, I AM both fire-proof and bulletproof! You silly dragonite."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Oh, was born! This is really bad."

Apparently it's bad that you were born, Cuddles.
 
Why not?

Original text:

""We wonder are you ready to join us now? Hands in the air we will show you how. Come and try. Caramell will be your guide. So come and move your hips sing. Look at your two clips do it. You and me can sing this melody."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Let me teach you how ready you have to make sure caramell pension, contact information, forget it, talk to him, look, you know what happened to me two pictures and say that I'm not"

Nailed it

You need to make sure that you are ready for us...I'll teach you how come and try caramell pension. The contact information. So :red: it, sing it, take a look at these two photos, just for you and for me, I don't know how to sing.
 
Original text:

"You were good son, real good; maybe even the best."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"So,well,good for kids."
 
Original text:

"We are who we are, but that is constantly changing. Always re-arranging."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"X - we will do everything we can, but the situation has changed. And at any time."

Mr. X strikes again!
 
(how did I not find this gem of a thread sooner)
Original text:

""You can use your pickaxe to dig through Dirt, and your axe to chop down trees. Just place your cursor over the tile and click!""

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"You can use the hoe to dig to reduce the axe. Use your mouse, click and hold, then select, then click below."
 
(how did I not find this gem of a thread sooner)
Original text:

""You can use your pickaxe to dig through Dirt, and your axe to chop down trees. Just place your cursor over the tile and click!""

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"You can use the hoe to dig to reduce the axe. Use your mouse, click and hold, then select, then click below."
Sounds like some kind of secret!
Hoes...
Axes...
Using a hoe on an axe reduces it's durability and you can do something by clicking and holding on a block, to select it, then click the block below?
Minecraft Easter egg confirmed?

Original text:

"Using a hoe on an axe reduces it's durability and you can do something by clicking and holding on a block, to select it, then click the block below? Minecraft Easter Egg Confirmed!"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"In the upper right corner, lower energy consumption, you select it and click on the building that you can use the code from the gallery group, new, enter the name"

Bad translator is the master of cryptic messages.
 
Original text:

"You did not reach the Nuclear Throne"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Nuclear power is the old king"

Alright. That's ok I guess.
Let's try make the translate order random...

Original text:

"You did not reach the Nuclear Throne"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Nuclear throne "

Apparently Nuclear Throne killed You did not reach the.
 
Original text:

"Let's translate this sentence that is about translating a sentence based upon the idea of translation. The translation could be fun to decipher the hidden meaning within, but you never know."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"I want to change the translation of ideas. Translator and not in the sense of hidden, but I don't know."

It wants to change the translation of the idea of a Translator, that's not hidden. Well, it's not sure, anyway.
 
Original text:

"Some people hate needles. Some spiders. I hate it when the hole in the center of the bagel is mushed."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Some people, needles, I hate this kind of back down the hole like potatoes."

What's with the potatoes!?
 
Original text:

"Some people hate needles. Some spiders. I hate it when the hole in the center of the bagel is mushed."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Some people, needles, I hate this kind of back down the hole like potatoes."

What's with the potatoes!?
Original text:

"Something tells me the bad translator likes potatoes... a bit too much."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"Can someone please tell me what is the problem? Potatoes, I want to eat a little more."

It sees no problem in liking potatoes.
 
Original text:
"Pirates killed my Goblin Tinkerer, my Painter, my Angler and my Nurse."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:
"hacker killed, I think he's an artist,a hunter and a brother."


Original text:
"Random fact: Mimics drop more coins than the Wall of Flesh."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:
"For example, this is part of a wall of money "


Original text:
"I have a strange tendency to pick things up with my feet. (True!) "

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:
"The problem is that the foot ( ... ) "


Original text:
"This is my fourth and final translation of the post!"

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:
"The fourth and last here is the updated message!"
 
Original text:

"Nobody knows if the Pyro is a man or a woman, except for me, because I am Gabe Newall."

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:

"IC, if it's still a man and a woman, for me it seems to me that Gabe Newell."
 
I managed to pull these off even though they exceeded the maximum characters:


Original text:

"“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!” "
...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:
"When life makes you lemons into lemonade, let life take the lemons back! Lemon didn't do x, I don't want you to judge? After meeting with the prime Minister, who is responsible for ensuring life, we're looking for! This is a decision on the day, rice cereal, I'm sorry, I love lemon! You have to know who I am actually, I don't want to know who I am, the wood, and lemon, and I want to be an engineer, I can't burn down the house toss with lemon!! "



Original text:
"Well here we are again It's always such a pleasure Remember when you tried to kill me twice? Oh how we laughed and laughed Except I wasn't laughing Under the circumstances I've been shockingly nice You want your freedom? Take it That's what I'm counting on I used to want you dead but Now I only want you gone She was a lot like you (Maybe not quite as heavy) Now little Caroline is in here too One day they woke me up So I could live forever It's such a shame the same will never happen to you You've got your short sad life left That's what I'm counting on I'll let you get right to it Now I only want you gone Goodbye my only friend Oh, did you think I meant you? That would be funny if it weren't so sad Well you have been replaced I don't need anyone now When I delete you maybe I'll stop feeling so bad Go make some new disaster That's what I'm counting on You're someone else's problem Now I only want you gone Now I only want you gone Now I only want you... gone "

...43 translations later, Yandex gives us:
"And now here we are again. We will always do... Remember, we have a little more time. Two people have died... What we laughed with each other. You will not lose anything Very It's a strange thing. I want to be free? It I love I want to die. But I want to get out of here. You (This will be very difficult) Now little Caroline is in here. I wake up It's always been. It's a scary thing. . You can do it In summary, I don't know. I love I said it's my choice I want to get out of here. Hi, I'm a man I know it's personal? Could be interesting If you're tired. What I mean is, will be changed. I believe in you. Don't get it. You need to stop feeling like this. You won't be bored. I love This guy is not a problem. I want to get out of here. I want to get out of here. Besides,I'm just trying to understand this. "
 
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