Gone Horrifically Wrong/Right

At a very poor time, as when you go outside, it would be during a rather severe thunderstorm, with you being struck by lightning after a couple minutes.

I try to open a portal to Shadowfell.
 
Apparently, it's a portal to your deepest nightmares, but they're true. One of them gets you killed, another, trapped in a loop to be killed over and over.

I try to open a portal to Equestria.
 
You are successful, however, the Equestria you end up in is currently in a state of war as Daybreaker and Nightmare Moon are both sending ponies to fight and die for them with no regard to the lives of their subjects. And you are quickly conscripted, and sent to fight.

I set a bottle on a shelf.
 
The bottle falls down on you, breaking upon your head and somehow fracturing your skull. It reaches through and punctures your brain, killing you in 3 minutes, before you can even make it to the hospital.

I make some pavlova
 
It's absolutely fantastic. Except for how someone misread it as pavlava, leading to it accidentally having actual lava added as an ingredient, which you only discover after you start eating it...

I decide to start over on a fanfiction.
 
But you accidentally ended up reading detailed instructions on how to commit the worst crimes imaginable and the FBI and every country's police force is after you...

I lay down in bed.
 
Except you lie for too long and your muscles atrophied to the stage where you couldn't get up. And then you died of dehydration.

I have some sorts of strange daydreams.
 
And one about you being chased by a dragon suddenly comes true.

I wrap a present.
 
But there's a huge spider under it, it bites you and you die.


I put on my sweater.
 
And the explosives-sweater wearing MrChainChomp actually didn't blow up. In fact, there was an ability to conjure some under you, which caused you to blow up and of course be unable to type out your other part.

I cram the subjects for the exams.
 
Unfortunately, somehow this ends up going horrifically wrong in that all of the papers for your exams get crammed inside of your head, and crush your brain.

I stay up until 4:00.
 
And... end up passing out inside a car that's running itself off a cliff.

I wonder what kind PFP Undying Lovatic has - to do that, I decide to release it from the frame.
 
However, as I can't find a ussr by that name now, it causes an error, which makes the exec_drwf73 script fail to execute, making me also stop existing.


I talk about definitions of tangent and cotagent and how if you define one in terms of the other there should be a point of discontiniuty that doesn't exist when defined properly in terms of sine and cosine
 
When you try to talk about trigonometry, a horde of natives apparently hunt you down because the knowledge they can't use and since dragon is fulfilling meal for them, well.

I start building a house of cards in my boredom.
 
When you try to talk about trigonometry, a horde of natives apparently hunt you down because the knowledge they can't use and since dragon is fulfilling meal for them, well.

I start building a house of cards in my boredom.
You successfully complete it. Aliens kidnap you to exploit your inhuman precision.

I steal this thread and post it in Klei Forums.
 
You accidentally clicked on the wrong link, causing your computer to download malware and completely destroy it!
I become a super mega genius! (Like 10000 IQ)
 
In doing so, you're seen as a war machine, and therefor, neutralised before putting your intelligence into breaking an important monopoly.

I decide to crack on monopolies by running for a politician.
 
In doing so, you're seen as a war machine, and therefor, neutralised before putting your intelligence into breaking an important monopoly.

I decide to crack on monopolies by running for a politician.
You get shot in the head.

I decide to uncover the mystery of a man that was shot in the dead attempting to crack on monopolies.
 
You succeed in such, but before you can speak up about it, you are successfully poisoned by the CIA.
I just want to get a girlfriend
 
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