The NPC Chronicles 1.3
Chapter 1 - Legend of the Player
By Kyouko Tsukino
Last update: October 20, 2015
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"Lunette, you can't be serious."
"I'm very serious, Amy. That guy is worthless, we can't depend on him to save our world."
"But he's the Player. He's the one meant to save us all."
The Dryad, Lunette, sneered at that. "I'll admit his title fits him, since all he does is
play around all damn day, and sleep at night. And just look at this room, if you can even call it that."
The Nurse, Amy, knew what her friend meant. The room was obviously made in a hurry, with wooden boards which didn't quite align correctly, and let the cold air of the snow biome seep in. And from what she had seen, the few other rooms in the base were just as bad, even her own. To add insult to injury, the only furniture in the room were small, dim torches, a table, and a chair. She let out a short sigh, then nodded. "You may be right, but the legends..."
"May have been a scam," Lunette interrupted. "We can defend ourselves, we may be able to fight the bosses the legends speak of - if most of them even exist, judging by how accurate the legend has been about the Player."
"So we just kick him out? He may defend himself."
"With what? A copper sword and his tin armor? He used all the gold and silver he found to build himself a huge house before even crafting better gear. The Player, the legendary savior of Terraria? He looks more like a legendary failure."
"You're not much better off, though," Amy commented. "The most threatening weapon you seem to have besides your sarcasm is... A herd of bunnies."
"Even a herd of bunnies would beat that guy."
"... I'm sorry, but I'll believe it when I see it."
"Still, you're smart, Amy. Probably smarter than me. You should see things don't work like that ancient text - the one Garret treasures like a million platinum coins - say they should."
"Yes, you're right."
"I'll need your help convincing the others, they both seem to be suffering their own kind of blindness."
As they walked out of the 'room' - it was hard for Lunette to think about it as a room at all - the Dryad's mind drifted to the not-so-distant past, to the day she first met the group.
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Lunette wasn't sure where she was, but there was something calling her to the snow biome. As a Dryad, she would generally avoid it, as her race's clothing wasn't too keen on keeping them warm. Still, she knew she had felt something in the back of her mind, ever since she woke up in the forest, and she had decided she would find out what it was.
As she finished climbing the fifth snow mount, she saw buildings in the distance. Or rather, a large golden building surrounded by a few small wooden huts. That was what she had been looking for, somehow she knew it. When she was less than a hundred meters away from the 'village' she saw a woman wearing a nurse uniform walk out of one of the huts and straight to her. "Uh... Hi?"
"Hello, you must be the Dryad."
"I'm a Dryad, yes," Lunette said.
"Strange, the legend predicted you would come after the first Boss was destroyed," the other woman fell silent for a few seconds before smiling. "Oh, but where are my manners. I'm Amy."
"Lunette."
"Nice to meet you. The Player is not here right now, but I can take you to him."
"The Player?"
Amy nodded. "Yes. Come with me and I'll explain all I know while we get to where the Player is."
It was then that Lunette saw a tall, wooden tower in the distance. For some reason, that building filled her with dread, but she didn't know why, at the time. She would find out soon enough...
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Much despite himself, he couldn't complain. While he missed his world, in that world he was just another guy, but here, he was a hero, and even though some creatures he had seen were dangerous, he just had to avoid the areas where they dwelled.
As he approached the base he had built for himself and his crew, he saw they were all waiting outside his house. The Dryad was leaning on the large golden door, staring at him in a way that told him she wasn't there for a social meeting. Just what were these useless goons up to? "What's up, tree face?"
"Your time here, that's what's up," Lunette countered.
"... What does that even mean?"
"It means you're useless and the world doesn't need someone useless, it needs a hero."
"I'm the Player, miss. You've surely heard Garret-"
Garret, the Guide, decided to interrupt him. "I'm willing to admit legends may not be a hundred percent accurate. In your case, they were somewhere around zero percent."
"When weighing your worth to the group, mister Razor, you have been found extremely lacking," Calvin, the Merchant, added.
Razor sighed. "You morons can re-spawn, and so can I-"
"If legends are true on that," Lunette noted.
"If you want me to kill, I'll do it until you see I'm a hero."
Amy blinked at that. "I don't think that's quite-"
Razor looked at the four. "So, who's first?"
"I'm going to fight you," Lunette said, "alone. If I win, you'll leave. If you win, I will never say a thing about your methods again."
"
You are going to fight me?" the man mused. "What are you going to do, heal me with flying leaves, or wear less clothing?"
The Dryad picked up a spear she had concealed in the snow. "I bet you'd love the second choice to be a thing, but I guess I'll take a third option."
"You must be de-spear-ate to win," Razor noted.
"Know what I won't miss?" Amy asked. "His horrible puns."
Lunette didn't give a warning, thrusting her spear at Razor. He dodged by rolling to the side, and used his momentum to stand up, rushing at the Dryad while swinging his sword.
"I forgot to bring popcorn," Calvin commented as the two fighters switched back and forth between offense and defense. He noticed bunnies had started gathering around them. Dozens of bunnies. For some reason, they were getting on his nerves more than Razor had during the month he had known him. "Uh, what's with the-"
"That's Plan B," Amy simply said. She had to admit that Lunette's explanation on how bunnies could be used was both hard to believe and, if true, something she wanted to see.
"... Okay, I'll just keep watching The Beauty and The Imbecile then."
"Now, now," Razor noted after barely dodging his foe's spear, "I know Lunette isn't the brightest mind in this world, but she's not an imbecile."
Calvin sighed. "Can I stab him through yet?"
"Lunette can beat him," Amy said.
"Ha, as if!" Razor said, right before being stabbed through his right arm, causing him to drop his sword. "
, that hurt."
"That was the idea," Lunette said, pulling her spear back and preparing to stab him again.
"There's something you're forgetting, dear Dryad," Razor said.
"And what is that?"
Razor smirked as he picked the sword up with his other hand. "I am left handed."
The Dryad dodged a few swipes and sighed. Again, Razor was trying to stop her from attacking by making sure he was close enough to her for her spear to be useless. But she had other means of fighting. She dodged again, then ducked and kicked his legs, making him lose balance and fall to the ground face-first. She stood up and put her spear near his throat as he tried to stand up. "Give up."
"Oh, I guess I will have to give- Nope!" As he said that last word, he threw a couple grenades at the Dryad. She yelped and leapt back, but the explosion still got her, knocking her back and against the golden walls of Razor's house. "Had enough?"
Lunette staggered up, bruised and bleeding, but still refusing to surrender. "I've had enough of you, yes." She smiled. "Plan B time, guys."
Razor took a defensive pose, expecting the others to attack him, but instead saw dozens of bunnies gathering around his foe. "... What."
"If you, the mighty 'Player,' spent more time learning about how things work than killing and looting everything you find, you would know some creatures can be tamed."
"But really, bunnies? I'll admit they are probably better fighters than you are, but they're still harmless."
"If you had actually ventured into the Corruption or Crimson, you would know what happens to bunnies when infected by those biomes." As she said that, she took out two small bags, one purple, the other red. "Get ready for the bunnygeddon."
Razor saw the Dryad drop the contents of the two bags. Two small clouds of dust, one purple and the other red, descended on the bunnies, and the change in them was swift. Some of them had their skin turn purple as their fur fell off, while the other half simply seemed to lose the skin altogether, becoming flesh-like bunnies. In seconds, he was being stared at by dozens of red, glowing eyes. "Oh
no..."
"Bunnies, attack!" the Dryad ordered, and the small creatures all charged at Razor as one.
Garret saw Razor run away, followed by the horde of small yet dangerous monsters, and sighed. "Guess that means you won."
Amy walked to Lunette and gave her a healing potion. "I don't get it, though. Why did they only attack him?"
"It's because of the dust itself, and how I trained them. See, bunnies hate to be turned into monsters. They don't attack because they're evil, they attack because they're angry and looking for targets. I turned those bunnies into monsters and back to normal countless times, and each time I turned them 'evil' I would make sure the first thing they saw was a tin armor."
Calvin stared at the Dryad in shock. "Lady, if only you were twenty years older..."
"I would still not be interested in your flirting," the Dryad said bluntly.
"So, now what?" Garret asked.
"Now we tear this stupid building down, get ourselves some gold gear, and build some actual housing. Then we'll start working on that legend of yours, if there really is an ancient evil out there, then it shouldn't be left alive so idiots like Razor stumble upon it and screw the world up for everyone else."
"Who died and made you our leader?" Calvin asked, half-joking.
"Razor, hopefully," the Dryad said with a shrug.
