GawenStarTeller

the pokemon center nurse in sun and moon is like "Welcome to the Pokemon Center! You're up late!", it's 6:00 PM

Wouldn't it be an ideal world if mosquitoes didn't irritate your skin when they bit you? Like, I'll reproduce the amount of blood they typically drink within a minute, do I care if you steal some and use it to survive? But nooo, your skin swells up afterwards for a couple of days...

Jet packs are so incredibly popular in science fiction that I keep forgetting that they're exclusively fictitious

ever just purposely not fall asleep because you know that if you do you're going to inevitably wake up and have no excuse to avoid facing pressing responsibilities for the day

beh

it may come as a surprise to people that saying you find listening to thunderstorms to be relaxing and stress relieving doesn't actually assist individuals that have a fear of them

WHY IS THERE A LOWER PERCENTAGE OF GREEN AND BLACK JUJUBES

calamine lotion resembles a strawberry milkshake while its still in the bottle and i have the urge to drink it

we need a moose pokemon that channels the essence of canada

Look man, I know that Axe body wash is advertised towards a certain brand of customers, but I don't think there's a single person in this world whose favourite scent is specifically a combination of new sneakers and freshly baked cookies.

I feel like Gamefreak could add a very slight amount of variety to their generic Pokemon formula if the protagonist lived with exclusively their dad in one generation instead of their mom.

sheldon, this isn't water. this is gasoline

Something the removal of Adobe Flash Player has taught me: you're telling me that people have been capable of creating animations that are compatible with mobile users all this time, and they just, didn't?

Fun fact: Spinarak and its evolution, Ariados, are not available in the Galar Pokedex in Pokemon Sword and Shield. This is because spiders don't exist in Britain.

And then God said, "only certain people will be deathly allergic to nuts, because them in particular."

It's such a tragedy that Yahoo Answers is filled to the brim with trolls and genuinely unsalvageable stupid individuals considering it has the potential to be such a helpful community platform.

just saying, but if you were one of the teachers that forced all of the children to go outside during a blizzard at recess and just stood indoors watching them all bundled up and cozy instead of supervising them outside, sincerely, you

furnace (blast edition)